- “If you were really gay, you’d have sex with me. Are you sure you’re not actually straight?” is not helping you find the right label, it’s manipulating you into sex and that’s abuse.
- “I accept your asexuality but I have needs. You need to give me blowjobs at least.” is not a compromise. It’s demanding you to perform a sexual act and that’s abuse.
- “You’re bi and that means you’ll cheat on me if I let you hang out with guys!” is not the cute kind of jealousy. it’s controlling who you spend time with and that’s abuse.
- “I know you go by them/they but I’m angry at you, so I’ll call you he today.” is not a normal little fight. It’s using your dysphoria against you and that’s abuse.
- “If you don’t do what I want, I’ll tell your mom you’re trans and she’ll kick you out” is not a normal little fight, either. It’s using a vulnerable situation to manipulate you and that’s abuse.
- “You’re lucky you got me, nobody else would love someone as complicated and weird as you” is not a love confession. It’s trying to make you feel dependent on them and that’s abuse.
All of those sentences are examples of someone using your identity against you. That’s not acceptable behavior and is not the way you deserve to be treated.