My favorite straight people proverb is “not that there’s anything wrong with that”
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@mcnuggys
My favorite straight people proverb is “not that there’s anything wrong with that”
him: i have a mommy kink me: okay…..im supposed to act like ur…mommy? him: yeah me: why all these damn dishes in the sink
funny story
one time in sixth grade i got into a fight with my best friend. after some time, we started talking to each other again on msn messenger. we had been chatting for a while until we realized we hadn’t “officially” made up yet so she asked me “will you be my friend again?”. i then simultaneously thought back of the recent hannah montana episode i saw where lilly and miley fought and lilly asked the same question. miley’s answer was “no” “…i’ll be your BEST friend”. thinking that she was so cool saying that i wanted to reply the same way. so i sent her “no” and before i could type out the rest of it my internet decided to disconnect. needless to say, she didn’t talk to me after that.
when you’re a lying ass power bottom living in the heteropatriarchy
Eh I’d still let him plow me.
when somebody is crying and ur like
[while choking back a sob, tears visible] i’m good dude i’m so good. i’m way fucking. good. man. i’m GOOD
being the cutest and gayest member of my family is a lot of work but somebody has to do it
Like I’m straight but I still feel like this implies to me. Haha
no it doesn’t.
reporter:
the funniest part about this vine is that u can literally see her get the idea to tape her nose like that omg
Why aren’t we talking about Dylan sprouse have you SEEN his tweets?
GUYS SERIOUSLY
G U Y S
we could have had a singing career.
when she says she doesn’t send nudes
when guys objectify women and expect them to send nudes
when someone asks you about your nuclear plans for russia
When Russia sends you nudes
what i learned from school
im a fucking piece of shit
everybody else is also a fucking piece of shit
mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell
cant argue with that
I feel you
Only people that I trust can touch my hair