MomFaceJace

Just scratching the surface

[momfacejace]

Let’s talk about labor... FAST labor

I want to start off by saying.. all labor sucks. C-sections suck too. Children are totally worth it but that doesn’t change the suck-factor.

We’ve all seen the shows and documentaries about “beautiful, natural” labor where breathing techniques, tubs of water, aromatherapy, music and healing touch are used make a calming environment, no medications are needed and the baby comes out with two pushes.... this has not been my experience. If this has been yours.. HIGH FIVE, but I bet it still sucked in some way, shape or form.

That being said, I have short labors... hold your applause.. I know. When I say this, people typically respond with “I hate you” or “that must be nice” today I even had a fellow mother tell me that, (since she had a 21 hour labor) “people like me call people like you, bitches.” First off.. WTH?!?!

Moving on, I have a strong distaste for people who think this way, the ones that say “you’re blessed” or “lucky you”...

I’ll tell you why

All mothers should acknowledge that labor isn’t easy no matter how fast or slow.

There is a difference between a fast labor and precipitous labor, I have precipitous labor. This type of labor can have a multitude of issues associated with it.

Precipitous labor is defined as the delivery of a baby in less than three hours from the onset of contractions. It happens in less than 3% of laboring mothers.

You know the three stages of labor we learned about in birthing class? Yeah, you can throw those out the window... along with the breathing techniques, position changes and massage points they told you would help with the pain.

Physical issues

Pain- there is zero opportunity to get accustomed to the type of pain labor brings. When contractions progressively get longer, harder and closer together your body has the chance to release substances that help with pain, like natural pain meds. In this type of labor it is 0 to 10 in T-minus NO seconds. You are blindsided by pain. Personally, when my contractions start they are about four minutes apart with very little, to no recovery time between, it basically feels like one long contraction. This type of immediate active labor causes panic (especially in first time mothers) and the complete inability to cope with the escalating situation. An epidural is essentially off the table unless by some miracle (literally) you have enough time.

Complications associated with precipitous labor include hemorrhage related to uncharacteristicly long and forceful contractions, as well as tissue injury from expedited dilation and delivery. In my first delivery I lost a quarter of my blood volume and passed out.. maybe from shock, pain, blood loss or a combination of all three.

Psychological issues

These issues range from anxiety to PTSD. I know, personally, I have an extremely strong case of labor anxiety that is very real and present in the third trimester. No amount of planning or preparation can ease the anxiety, I have gone through all possible scenarios in my head, I keep umbilical clamps in my purse for God’s sake. Here are just a few of the reasons people with precipitous labor have anxiety.

Pain: remember, there is almost no option for an epidural. The pain is unpredictable and immediate, like you’re waiting on your arm to get chopped off at any given moment.

The fear of being alone or unassisted: It is absolutely and entirely unsafe for a woman who delivers this way to drive herself to the hospital for obvious reasons. So you wonder, What if my partner isn’t there to get me to the hospital? Who will deliver my baby? How do I deliver myself? How do I keep the baby safe if I have to deliver this a way?

If you have kids, the fear of being unable to take care of them: What if the neighbors aren’t home to take the kids? What if Im home alone with the kids and they see all this go down? Will that traumatize them?

The fear of delivering in an unclean environment: will I end up on the news? “Lady delivers baby in... car, waiting room, bank (insert any undesirable place here). Infection and amniotic aspiration is a very real concern for people who deliver in situations like this; thats something they don’t tell you in those news stories.

So, my point is, when someone tells you they deliver fast, don’t downplay their anxieties or concern by saying idiotic things; like they won some sort of biological lottery of motherhood.

Labor sucks, just accept it, it’s not a competition

Maybe even ask them about their labor experience so you can hear it for yourself. Believe me, you’ll be able to tell if they feel “lucky” or “blessed.” You both can connect over the stories instead of casting judgement about how YOU think THEY should feel about THEIR unique experience, because in truth, every labor is unique.

If you want to hear my unique labor story for my first son, Liam, just check out my blog about it. I haven’t documented my son Beau’s labor story but now that I think about it.. maybe I will. Baby #3 on the way... 3rd trimester.. bring on the labor anxiety.

[momfacejace]

So you want to go to Nurse Anesthesia School?

I am now well in to my second semester of Nurse Anesthesia school and I can finally breathe.. at least somewhat. I am enrolled in the Raleigh School of Nurse Anesthesia (Raleigh, NC).  I thought Id say a few words to those nurses who were searching the corners of the internet for "what to expect when you're expecting Anesthesia School."  

If you are planning on applying to school:  There a loads of blogs out there where people have asked what credentials you need to get in.  NO ONE KNOWS.. bottom line!  All you really can do is have the prerequisites and as many "extras" as possible.  I have known schools to accept people with the bare minimum over others with a "stacked" application.  I would suggest you go to the summer "sneak peak" type of courses for the schools you are looking at (if they offer any).  I had no idea which school was the best fit for me until I saw it for myself.  That being said, the two schools I was looking at had drastically different "personalities" and I thank the sweet baby Jesus that I didn't end up in the "other" school.  If they don't offer programs like that, maybe you can request a meeting with the director.  The school you go to and the hospitals you rotate to will truly make a difference in your education.

REMEMBER: The "ratings" of schools are subjective, basically they hand out surveys to influential people in the field.. there is little to no standardization of results.

Now you know you WANT to go... but can you AFFORD it?  Figure it out! From my experience, it is almost imperative to have a nest egg of funds before even thinking of applying.  Im talking an ostrich egg.. not a robin's egg.  Some financial aid is available... take EVERYTHING they are offering (you'll be able to pay it back).  The key is to not be distracted by finances AT ALL while you are in school, aint nobody got time for that!

The most important thing to me is family, above all, it was my priority to make sure everyone was on board.  They had to understand completely that I would be committed to something, OTHER than them, for the next two years.  You are signing your WHOLE family up for this crazy life so be considerate or you won't have one when you get out.

[momfacejace]

Im back.. and Ive been busy!

So its only been a few years but heres an update..

A.) Im still a mom, Its the best thing Ive ever done.  Liam is two and a half now!  He is funny and kind, spoiled but smart.  He amazes me every day.

..and..

B.) I have started a Nurse Anesthesia program, unfortunately it rules my life. 

Me and Lee had to move our little family to Raleigh to live with his parents so we can afford to go to school (Ill be doing a series on Anesthesia School after this)

We are renting out our home to people we don't know, through a rental agency, while living 2 hours away (talk about anxiety)

I will be without a paycheck (but working 50+ hours a week) for the next two years.. this blows

[momfacejace]

The most wonderful time of the year

[momfacejace]

Tips and tits

Here are a few pointers I have learned in the past 5 months about breastfeeding.. Its not all inclusive, its just a few things I have run in to.  This is in no way supposed to be instructional.. it is mostly things that people dont tell you, but things that I have found to be true in my own experience.

First things first, Its amazing, one of the only things I would really stand behind as a "you really need to do this" thing for babies.  For the most part Im very, do it how you want to, kind of mom but I feel like each mom should at least make an attempt to introduce breastmilk into their baby's diet.

Here goes: (the stuff you have heard)

Its good for baby, lots of good stuff to help baby fend off germs and so many other good medical advantages

Its cost effective, the most expensive thing is a pump (which I reccomend getting a good one) and that is WAY less expensive than what you would spend on formula

It is fantastic for baby/mommy bonding and as a way to really take the edge off some of that postpartum blues 

(Stuff they didnt tell you)

It hurts.  Lactation consultants will drill it in your head that if it hurts youre doing it wrong.. thats bull.  It hurts like crazy for the first two weeks, but if you can tough it out it eventually does not hurt in the least.  If you want to give up, call up a friend that knows about breastfeeding and talk about it, chances are they went through the same thing.  If you dont have one, there are ALWAYS breastfeeding support groups, this is also a good way to meet moms with babies around the same age.. play dates anyone?

A note about lactation consultants, they are a great resources but I think sometimes they forget what is like to be a nursing mother, especially if its your first time.  They can be abrasive, matter of fact and some times down right inappropriate.  They may touch you without asking, tell you that youre doing it wrong, get frustrated with you when youre already frustrated with the situation... etc..  Just keep trying and be an advocate for yourself, ask whatever questions you have and know that you are trying to do something beautiful here and negativity is NOT ALLOWED!

Within those first two weeks; Lanolin is good to have, but it will by no means "take the pain away" or even fix the problem.  This time is simply your body getting used to breastfeeding... THIS TOO SHALL PASS.

Growth spurts suck.. you feel like your breasts are out all day and you never put your baby down.  Just feed your baby when they are hungry, lounge in bed all day if you have the opportunity.. your baby depends solely on you.  Soon; THIS TOO SHALL PASS.

Eat, sleep and drink.. keeeep those calories coming, and if your loosing weight too fast (yes this happens) have your significant other keep you in check.  I know my wonderful husband cracks the whip when I havent had a really good meal all day.  Its understandable, you are a new mom, taking care of a newborn or infant and at some point you also add going to back to work in the mix.. its not easy to remember to take care of yourself.

Your breasts get big, real big.. some people find that one will get bigger than the other and that can be fixed or lessened by good feeding management or a few extra pump sessions.  If you have any questions about milk management please feel free to ask, I feel like a breastfeeing pro at this point.

When you pump, dont assume what you are getting out is all you have.. pumps are no where near as effective as your little one at getting the goods.

When bottle feeding your exclusively breast fed baby, remember, they will over eat if you let them.  They dont have to work as hard to get the milk out of the bottle, so they will drink the same amount faster and their "Im full" receptors wont have caught up yet.  Also sometimes bottles will allow little drips to come out when the baby isnt actively sucking but this stimulates their suck reflex and they will finnish off that bottle in no time.

Some breastfed babies eat every two hours.. or three.. or four; breast milk is metabolized in 90 minutes which is faster than formula. A good rule of thumb, feed your baby when they are hungry, common sense is a beautiful thing.  Some people like to "train" their baby to last longer, if you want to do that, its your prerogative. 

Exclusively breastfed babies poop a lot in the beginning.. like every feeding, but after the first month their habits change.  Every kid is different but mine for example has gone 10 days with out a bowel movement.  As long as your baby has plenty of wet diapers, seems happy, has a soft tummy and is passing gas regularly, I wouldnt start to worry right off the bat.  Exclusively breastfed babies have much less trouble with constipation than do formula fed babies.

I have heard people suggest things like juice and suppositories but I didnt feel like I needed to result to that since he seemed comfortable.  What I did do was take his temperature once a day, rectally, lubricated with vaseline.  Another key thing is to bathe your baby, lather him with some really good smelling lotion and dress him in one of your favorite outfits... see where Im going with this?  It seems like the universe will only let a baby be clean and good smelling for a short period of time.

Another note about poop, keep an eye on it but dont stress over it.  Liam's turned green.. so I researched what it could be, and used my noggin to narrow down what I thought it was.  I ended up cutting out dairy and he has been A-OK, basically I thought it was a food allergy and all the resources I looked at said dairy was the most common.  Since then I have reintroduced dairy and he has tolerated it wonderfully, a lot of people wait until a year to do this or 6 months off dairy. I have been told its a all or nothing response, so if you have just a little dairy one day and baby's poop is green again or he is super fussy.. you know its not time.

If you get sick, it is almost always recommended that you continue breastfeeding, you will give your little one antibodies to the bug you are fighting off and no one wants to battle engorgement or mastitis along with whatever cold you already have.  Not to mention, this kind of "cold turkey" weaning would be an emotional roller coaster for both mom and baby I would imagine. 

Finally.. formula is NOT the enemy.. many babies thrive on formula, hell I never had one drop of breast milk and I am happy, healthy and pride myself on my awesome immune system :)  Attempt to breastfeed but dont put so much stress on yourself that your milk supply is affected.  Make sure your baby gets fed when they are hungry and you are doing a lot more than some people in this world.

If you have any questions or need support you can always contact me or your local la leche league representative.  A lot of hospitals also have lactation consultants that can help.. but remember what I said about lactation consultants :).  There is always plenty of online and local support.

Good luck!!

[momfacejace]

[momfacejace]

"Ode de spit-up"

Soo... its been a while since my last blog but being a mommy plus a heap of fall weddings have kept me and the family busy. 

  So lets catch up!  The last time I wrote I had just had my beautifully perfect in every way little boy, Liam.  Hes still beautiful and perfect and the most important thing Ive ever done with my life.  I cant imagine how I ever felt complete with out him.  Being a wife is something that made me feel the same way, just not as quickly.  I had been with Lee for 4 years before getting engaged and 5 years on the day we were married so there was some time to "wade" in to the role of wife.  Being a mom is something that is so crazy fast that it really surprises you how it feels like you were made for it.

   In Liam's first three months he had traveled first to the North Carolina Coast, then spent a week in the mountains of Tennessee, a few weeks later, enjoyed a weekend in the North Carolina mountains and finally back to the coast.  He turned in to a world class, back seat, rear facing, rider; and I mastered the art of breastfeeding in the back of a car jam packed with luggage.  He attended more weddings in his first three months then I had in my entire life before having him.  Life was wild and crazy to say the least! 

   Unfortunately, I eventually had to go back to work.  I haven't for a second regretted taking my full 12 weeks of maternity leave, even though our finances took a hit, it was worth it and I really advocate for that time spent between mother and child, it truly is precious.  Adjusting to going back to work was a bit tough and Im still working out the kinks but everything is pretty stable for now.  Jobs had to be changed, schedules had to be altered and grandparents had to be enlisted in order for Liam to have childcare.  Dropping down to one income was just not possible for us.  I really am grateful for our close knit families; we live an hour and a half away from both sides and they are being FANTASTIC in working their schedules to keep Liam on the weekends.  Another thing that I am a huge advocate for is family childcare, it takes a village to raise a child and I am so happy to have my family around to help.  Another thing that is important in this type of childcare is a family that will ask for, and carry out your wishes when it comes to raising your child.  There are things that I want to do with Liam that my parents or brother didn't do with their children and it is so helpful that they are willing to do it "my way."  As a mom you HAVE to be able to take advice and decide what you want to do with it, but in the end, it should still be your choice.

  Liam is gaining weight well and has already gotten his first shots, he is coming in to his personality and changing daily.  Its hard but Im just trying to remind myself to take it slow and enjoy every smile, giggle and sleepy minute I have with my son.  My new perfume is "Ode despit-up", I wear it with pride.  I have been peed on, pooped on, drooled on, and spit-up on and Im A-OK with it.  Strangers have seen my boobs and heard my child cry, coo and fart... Im a mom and its the absolute BEST thing in the world.

[momfacejace]

Running off rocket fuel..

So I absolutely refuse to watch TLC and anything related to "baby stories" but I tell you what, if my labor was on video tape, you could show it in courses for the "pros of celibacy."  I HAVE to share...

August 2, 2011

  11:45 Appointment with my midwife Vicki (I love her)  she offered to sweep my membranes, I had done some research on this and I declined in hopes baby Liam would eventually come on his own, I was only 39 weeks and 4 days.  I was a bit worried that it would make me cramp and not have any results or worse, make labor longer or harder.  She did check me, I was 2cm (for the second week) 75% effaced (for the third week) and -1 station (for the third week).

..after this I started having some braxton hicks.. no biggie but I thought hey, lets try to turn these in to  the real thing...

     ..veggie buffalo chicken for lunch, a short bounce on the exercise ball, a brief walk in the park with chewi, buffalo shrimp for dinner, a stroll around Target and some desperate housewives on netflix with the hubby.. still contracting.. but none of them were painful, I could tell they were harder than normal but no real reason to think they were the "real thing."  I started timing them around "desperate housewives" time and realized they were pretty darn regular... about 5-10mins apart.

    so I says to my husband, "if we go lay down and they dont go away Ill consider these the real thing" 

    after getting ready for bed; we lay down.. contraction one.. (OK that could be a fluke ).. 8mins later.. contraction two (well that was kind of a long break) and riiight at the end of it, the DISTINCT feeling/sound of a balloon popping inside me (thats not normal).  I hesitated for a second, I know what this feels like, but I feel no "water."  I got up to the bathroom and the flood gates open... this was 11:20 <-- remember this time guys

     Lee and I both called our parents and let them know my water had broken and they assure us they are on their way.   I take a shower, get ready, Lee takes a shower, drinks 2 cups of coffee, lets out the dog and by this time.. contractions hurt a hell of a lot more and are anywhere from 2-4mins apart... yeah

     12:00 We get to the hospital (mind you, we have yet to be able to get in touch with our midwife)  They get me in a room to check me.. Im 4.5cm, but holy COW it hurts.. Hillary; my midwife (I love her) had JUST finished delivering another baby; said OK dear, lets get you in a room.....

          ..... we get to the room and Im thinkin, this is hurting WAY more than I thought it would.. so I inform the nurses of my history of vagaling with pain/fear.. not to mention my nausea...

Hillary says "do you want a saline lock?"  Me: "its probably smart"  Hillary: "do you want a little bolus"  Me: "Its probably smart"

RN starts an IV; I say be careful with that tourniquet; she (for whatever reason) opens up my bolus with the tourniquet still on, vein blows (in a BIG way) surprise

Contractions by this point were super close, and SUPER hard to deal with, Im screaming, crying, trying to throw up and trying to let the RN start another IV, all the while not breathing in any particular pattern and cussing like a sailor.. I remember saying "I cant do this without some help, IM GOING TO NEED AN EPIDURAL"  Hillary said: "you need an IV first, so lets check you and see where you are."  We checked, 8cm (this was a good 30-40mins after they said I was 4.5cm) this is when I stated the obvious "ITS GOING TOO FAST!!"  After this, its all an uncontrolled, frantic and horrific blurrrrrr... I remember screaming like I was possessed, it sounded like nothing I had ever heard before, I remember not ever having the "option" to push like they do on tv.. my body wouldnt have cared anyway.. I remember the "ring of fire" if you ever have a kid, you'll know.. I remember looking down (bad idea) I dont remember how many times I pushed, but most vividly I remember this wet, warm, sticky baby being handed to me.  I cried because I had never in my life felt so much pain, I was unimaginably relived it was over and I was holding... him.  Time: 1:55am, (2.5 hours after the start of all this, Liam was waiting on no one)  Pain meds= 0.

My mom and dad made it right in time for the last push (my dad heard one good banshie scream, from outside the room, and immediately decided he would go no further)

After Liam was born I continued to bleed quite a bit and Hillary had to sew on me for a good hour to repair the damage from the 8lb 6oz linebacker running off rocket fuel, torpedoing out of my birth canal.  At this point I was still nauseous just from the shear thought of how much pain I had just been in.  The nurse said I had to try to pee before I went to my mother baby room, half way to the bathroom and I hit the floor, passed out cold.  I imagine someone should have put two and two together seeing as EVERYONE was aware of how much blood I had lost.  Thank God for Lee and his mad skills; he was the one kept me from cracking my head open.  Finally I got up to the mother baby room and thankfully, things got much less interesting.  36hrs and a good 2 hours of sleep later we got to go home :)

As of now, my hemoglobin is still pretty low at 8.5 from 12.5 (for those of you who know what that means).  Motrin and Percocet around the clock for all the damage my big boy inflicted.  Liam is eating well and getting plenty of kisses.  Mom and dad are ecstatic but very very tired.  So there it is, the baby story.  What a wild ride.

[momfacejace]

Are you having triplets??

hahha.. youre so funny, perfect stranger.  Im about to my wits end with people telling me how incredibly HUGE my baby is going to be.. mind you, none of the people offering this advice are doctors or midwifes.  So Im 39 weeks now, and just when you think you cant possibly get ANY bigger, you wake up one morning.. and youre still pregnant.  I work anywhere from 12-14 hour shifts as a nurse in an pediatric ICU, walking about 95% of that time so I feel all that hooplah about "walking the baby out" is a crock.  I have the hospital bag packed, the car seat installed and the nursery ready for its new occupant.. the only thing not ready is little Liam who seems much to happy swimming around in mommy's tummy.  I am going to miss the fact that I get to bring him with me everywhere with minimal effort, all the little kicks and jabs, and the feeling that everyone just seems nicer in general when youre pregnant but Im SUPER excited to meet the little guy.  At most I only have to wait 3 more weeks and I hope to God this child is of normal weight and has a normal sized head.. because this.. this is going to hurt.

[momfacejace]

One month to go.. am I excited?

Im in total disbelief that there is only one month before we meet our little man.  It feels like its just around the corner but at the same time, forever away.  People LOVE to ask me if Im excited, this is an interesting question for me.  In theory, Im excited to be able to hold him in my arms, and scared out of my mind about the amount of pain I will be going through to get to that point.  I guess this is around the time that mothers-to-be get nervous about labor.  There are an astonishing amount of complications that could happen with you, or your baby, and this doesnt even include the pain.  My worry for this week is that something was missed on his anatomy scan, having a "low risk" pregnancy is great except the fact that your baby only gets looked at one time, early in development, to decide if they will have any serious defects, this makes me super nervous.  Im also nervous about labor, obviously.  Where will I be when I go in to labor?  I work 45 minutes away from home, will I be able to get to the hospital Im delivering at if I go in to labor at work?  I may be working night shift, what happens when I have to drive all that way at 3am?  Will Liam be in the right position/mood for delivery?  Will the cord be an issue?  Will I hemorrhage?  I could go on for days... So when people ask me if Im excited, I have all this swirling around in my head but I politely say "oh yes, so excited!" because I know thats what they want to hear.  Not to mention, I honestly dont think their 2 cents is going to help me, and when youre pregnant... everyone has AT LEAST 2 cents to give.

[momfacejace]

Patiently Waiting 

[momfacejace]

Hot, Heavy & Out of Breath

... sounds like a good thing, but its so not.  This is how I feel all the time at this point thanks to my ever growing little man.  At 34 weeks pregnant these are just a few of your issues.  There is one thing that makes some of your "fat girl" symptoms a little more bearable, water, more specifically, the pool.  This would be all well and good if people weren't so judgmental.  The two places I get the most judgement is at the bar, and the pool.  Im not actually sure which is worse.  Im going to tell you, I do enjoy a glass of wine from time to time and I make no apologies for this (I am an educated woman and I have made an educated decision on this matter but I do expect some amount of judgement.. considering I live in America).  Back to my original point, the pool makes for a GLORIOUS retreat from some of the usual ailments of pregnancy.  I recommend every pregnant woman schedule it in there week as diligently as their prenatal appointments, its truly amazing.  If you say to yourself, sheesh I feel like I could cook an egg on my thigh...  get in to a cold pool.  If you feel like your body is full of lead and your legs cant carry you any further... the pool makes you feel like a dang weightless beauty.  If you are in your third trimester and your midwife or physician says you need to stretch/stay active and you think theyre nuts.. swimming is more realistic choice.  But be warned, as you waddle your beautifully huge belly poolside you will have all the looks, stares & whispers you can handle.  Its like being a leper in biblical times but do it anyway, its about the most fun you are allowed to have while you are growing your little one.  

[momfacejace]

Are you gonna make it??

I am very tired of people asking me this.. I dont understand what about me makes people think I am going to have my baby tomorrow.  I have 7 weeks left guys and Im not clinching my stomach in pain.. so take your "are you headed to the hospital after this" comments somewhere else.  So other than this, this week was fantastic.  We had our third and final baby shower last saturday and throughout these shindigs we have had an extreme amount of generosity and love shown to us from our friends and family.  The only thing Im not looking forward to is putting away all the cute little outfits and finding a place for all the other gifts, I need a fairy godmother to take care of this for me.. and while shes at it.. she can write my thank you notes and study for the GRE for me too!

[momfacejace]

As the belly grows.... and grows... and...

[momfacejace]

The Bumpy Road

So… here it is… a pregnancy blog. I figure after spending 32 weeks at it, its time to write a little something about my experiences.

Just a little something about me (incase your randomly found this); I’m a mid twenties nurse who works in the ICU at a children’s hospital. I have a FANTASTIC husband whom I love more than anything, and the best, most ridiculously adorable schnoodle on the face of the planet. Moving on…

The first trimester is a doozy... true story. I somehow managed to dodge most of the first trimester nausea; although I did have a taste of it for about a week it just made me appreciate the fact that I had so many weeks without it. The most nausea inducing thing I have had to do is battle the damn prenatal vitamins, pure evil. These things were made to torture people with no appetites; if you can’t put something on your stomach you might as well OD on some Flinstones, which is what I did most days that I feared the heave.

One question I have gotten a lot of is "how did you tell your parents?" We were right at 2 months along when Christmas rolled around; this made the whole thing exponentially more exciting. We had recently gotten our 8 week ultrasound done and had the tech print out a picture of our little blob. We put this in an envelope along with some champagne and put it under the tree, the story really writes itself. The fantastic thing is, because my family needs to document things like opening presents (who knows why), we caught the reaction of my mom and dad on video, it’s priceless. I’m sure Christmas was a magical time this year but I wouldn’t know, I slept through the whole thing… its funny how growing a human can be so draining, all I did was sleep and eat for an entire week. The best reaction to the "big news" came from my grandma Susie. She took one look at the ultrasound picture and said "what about this is supposed to tell me you’re pregnant." Apparently it was WAY too tech for her.

Wanna know how I told my work? Passed out in the middle of rounds… like hit the floor passed out. One of the attendings runs to my rescue and immediately try’s to work up a differential; I’m sure I looked dead (as I always do when the blood leaves my face- Alice Cullen has nothing on me). He starts rambling through all the obvious questions related to my blood sugar and pressure… I was still in a sweaty nasty daze when I finally could utter the words... I’m pregnant. They called the ED and in 3 minutes they were at my side with a stretcher… there was NO WAY I was getting on that thing. I was 14 weeks at this point and it was about time to tell them any ways… I was wondering how I would do it… problem solved.

All the books and websites will tell you, the second trimester is the best thing in the world! You get all your energy back and your pregnancy symptoms subside for about 3 months… for the most part… they lie. I had no such "surge" of energy. I did eat more, A LOT more; this is when I started showing- Id say around 16 weeks. We told our friends around this point, once the fear of miscarriage started to fade… this thought was ever-present up until about 20 weeks. The anatomy scan was the most nerve-wracking day I’ve had so far; as a Pediatric ICU nurse I know a lot of things that can go wrong, whether it was a boy or a girl was the least of my concerns. Luckily, the ultrasonographer assured me that our scan was negative (this is a good thing) and that we were looking at a developmentally appropriate growing little man (I know that’s an odd way to word it but… it sounds beautiful to me). My advice to anyone going for their anatomy scan, don’t get it early (i.e. 18 weeks) just so you can see if it’s a girl or a boy… schedule that sucker for 20 weeks so you have the BEST information as to how your little one is developing. Plus the pictures get better the longer you wait ;) you have no idea how much difference 2 weeks can make in what the ultrasonographer can see.

I know this is long winded, but 32 weeks is a long time.

After the anatomy scan our focus switched to baby showers and registries. Registering was a hard thing for me, being a super practical woman I walked in to Babies-R-Us and couldn’t, for the life of me find ONE place to register for a college fund. I settled for baby-proofing materials and large items like car seats, monitors, pumps and strollers.

As the days have gone on I really have enjoyed my growing belly. Don’t get me wrong, no one likes the see the numbers on the scale go up but don’t you worry… you wont be able to see them for long, your belly eventually gets in the way.

Alien. It’s the best way to describe what it feels like for a small human to move inside your gut. It starts with a soft little flutter, then comes the kicks and squirms. I have been blessed with a long torso so I have yet to get much discomfort from my little mover but I know its coming, I can feel the beginnings of it in my sternum, not from kicks as much as just how he’s getting so big in a place that has decreasing amounts of room.

I am well into the 3rd trimester at this point and the belly keeps getting bigger, I waddle more, and I realize I am no where near ready for this little man but I am so super stoked to have d-day right around the corner. I’ve decided to use this little site from here until August to update some of my friends and family who can’t be a part of this whole process. The updates will be more frequent and MUCH shorter, promise. Please, ask questions and leave comments with these blogs… they will MUCH more fun for me that way 

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Chewi loves his brother

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Lee's new toy; I like things that sparkle so I had to take a picture

Gibson "The Paul"