he/they • This blog has almost 0 tags unless I posted it and multiple fandoms are represented. I should probably fix that but I'm lazy lol • I MOVED TO @regiusquidam !!!
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When you're unsuccessfully looking for something and start gradually increasing your It Could Be There range. Like yeah sure maybe the rice cooker pot is in the freezer, idk
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Bruce Wayne is Danny Fenton's Bio dad but I'm getting sick of comically evil parents so Maddie and Jack had a 3sum with Bruce way-back-when and she never ACTUALLY got a paternity check (they forgot/it didn't matter) but then Jazz gets into knowing her bloodline and family history and does a 23andMe test and then it comes back that her and Danny are only half siblings and they're like "omfg…. did mom cheat on dad??? ….. ITS NOT VLAD IS IT??? OH NO. OH NO" and then Maddie and Jack see it and they're like "oh! lol! that's probably Brucie :)" and then they're like "wouldn't it be nice for you to meet your bio dad? he's such a fun guy. He's funded some of our projects <3" and then they send Danny to live with Bruce for the Summer
cue Batfam shenanigans of everyone trying to keep identities a secret
It's drizzling out. Danny's hair is still a little damp from the short trip from Jazz’s car to the front door. She hasn't even attacked him with a towel yet, insisting he'd catch a cold. Instead she had been too preoccupied with the pile of mail on the kitchen table. She'd screeched and dove for it, shuffling through the letters before pulling out one, large and thick, and ripping into it immediately.
Danny pulls out a piece of bread and slathers butter on it. He jumps on the counter and folds the bread in half and shoves it in his mouth.
Jazz stares down at the packet in her hands, face almost unreadable. “Huh.” She says.
The envelope on the table reads Ancestry.com.
“What, find out that you're actually adopted?” He asks through a mouthful of bread.
Jazz doesn't even [scold] him, just hands him the papers before sliding into a seat at the table, putting her head in her hands.
Danny doesn't quite get all the mumbo-jumbo and graphs and actually, hey. Did she steal his DNA for this because-
His eyes catch on “half-brother” and he can't look away.
The bread feels like cement as he forces himself to swallow.
“Uh, what?” He feels numb. “That can't- that's not-”
Jazz is shaking her head, hands moving to grip at her hair. “It's a mistake,” she says, “these things are- they're not that accurate. I thought it'd be fun to see if- but they must have gotten something wrong. It's probably a scam. Or something. I'm- I should call.” She stands up, a wild look in her eye. “I'm going to tell them they screwed up and that I want my money back because this-!”
“Dann-o!” Their dad calls as he enters the kitchen from the basement door. “Jazzy-pants! After school snack time? Boy I could use a sandwich! Hey what's this?” He pulls the papers from Danny's numb fingers. “Hey, hey! You got the fancy DNA results back! Think your grandpa lied about the Scotland castle? Haha let's see...”
“Dad, wait!” Jazz cries, but it's already too late.
It's like watching a car wreck in slow motion. Danny watches his dad scan the paper, watches his eyes freeze when he gets to the middle of the page.
Jack flips through the papers a few times, before returning back to the front page again.
His face is entirely unreadable.
“Hun?” He calls, still not looking away from the life ruining papers. “Could you come up here for a sec?”
Danny makes eye contact with Jazz.
“What is it?” Maddie calls as she comes up the stairs. “Did the new part come in?” She's still got goggles hanging around her neck.
“I need you to take a look at this,” Jack says, handing Maddie the papers. Danny looks on, horrified. It’s like everything’s moving in slow motion. It’s like watching someone walk up to the guillotine.
Maddie doesn't notice a thing, doesn't see the looks on her kids' faces. "Sure thing, dear, what is...?" she starts to ask, then trails off as she scans the page. She frowns.
The tension that had been sitting in Danny's stomach like a lead weight finally snaps. He stands, his chair screeching behind him, and says, "Mom, Dad-" not even knowing what he means to say, just knowing he needs to stop this, now.
Jack interrupts him. "That can't be right, can it Mads?" he asks, a strange solemness to his tone, his eyebrows drawn together.
Danny has a sudden, desperate, selfish wish that they weren't doing this in front of him. He doesn't want to see his family get torn apart, doesn't want his own existence to be the thing that ruins them. He's feared for that eventually ever since the day he walked into the ghost portal, but he never thought it would happen like this.
Maddie puts a hand up to her mouth. "No, it couldn't be," she mutters against her fingers.
"Danno was born in February," Jack points out, seemingly out of nowhere.
"Right," Maddie agrees. "So-" suddenly, her eyes spark in recognition. Danny's breath catches to see it. "Oh my goodness, Jack, Brucie!"
Danny's gaze snaps to his father, who... brightens? "Brucie!" he says jovially. "That'd explain it!"
What?
"Oh, I feel so silly," Maddie says, tapping her forehead. "We should've had a DNA test done ages ago, but I didn't even think about it!"
Jack laughs. "Don't worry, Mads, it completely slipped my mind, too!"
Jazz jolts up from her seat at the table, making Danny flinch. She slams her hands down and harshly demands, "One of you explain what is going on, right now!"
"I'm so sorry Jazz, this is yours, isn't it?" Maddie says blithely, and holds out the packet.
Air huffs from Jazz's nose. Danny thinks that she's trying to take deep breaths to keep calm, but mostly she sounds like an angry bull. "Are you implying-" she says, very deliberately "-that this information is accurate, and that Danny and I aren't full siblings?"
Jack claps Danny on the back, startling him. "Not to worry, Danny boy, you're just as much Fenton as ever! No silly thing like genetics will keep my son from taking up the noble pursuit of ghost hunting!"
Danny, feeling suddenly faint, collapses back into his chair. Hearing the words "my son" is somehow both relieving and terrifying. Because, yes, it's nice to be reassured, but he really didn't need the reminder that, apparently, he and his dad aren't even related.
Maddie turns to him as well. "Brucie is a perfectly fine genetic source, sweetie, it's alright. Very nice man, very handsome, a little dim a times but, well, he certainly does alright for himself."
Jack's hand comes down on Danny's back again. "No wonder the kid hasn't hit his growth spurt."
"Brucie is over six feet, Jack."
"Explain. How. This. Happened," Jazz seethes.
Maddie gives her a look. "I'm fairly certain that you know where babies come from, sweetie."
Jazz throws her hands in the air.
Surprisingly, it's Jack who actually picks up the thread. "Back before our research really took off, your mom and I used to get out a bit more."
"I was so happy we found a good babysitter for you, Jazz, do you remember her?"
"And Brucie was the best," Jack continues. "He always knew great spots! Jazz clubs, wine tastings, the works! We all got to be such good friends, and he even helped us start our business!"
Maddie smiles. "Our first investor," she says fondly.
"Our only investor!" Jack corrects.
Jazz also sits down, very abruptly. "Are you saying you were swingers?" she asks.
"Nothing so regimented as all that," Maddie says, flapping a hand. "Brucie only brought his own dates a few times, really. And we'd been spending time with a couple of others before him, but he was the last one. Gosh, Jack, we haven't seen him in forever!"
Jack agrees, "You're right, it's been too long, hasn't it?"
Finally, Danny manages to croak, "Who's Brucie?" His head is spinning with this new information, barely even latching onto the connection between himself and a man he's never met.
Jack says, "He's Bruce Wayne, of course!"
Jazz pops back up to attention. "Bruce Wayne?" she asks incredulously. "The Bruce Wayne?"
Maddie claps. "We should go for a visit! I'm sure he'd be happy to see us, and he'd love to meet you, Danny." She smiles warmly at him.
"That's a great idea!" Jack bellows. "A Fenton roadtrip to Gotham!"
Danny has a sinking feeling that his life is about to get significantly more complicated.
Alfred wasn’t surprised that his pseudo son had inherited his parent’s romantic preferences, preferences Alfred knew better than anyone.
Alfred was surprised by Master Bruce’s choice in partners. Partners who apparently had a child and had recently discovered that their son was not Mr. Fenton’s biological child.
At least the Fenton’s had the decency to inform Master Bruce once they discovered the … mix up, unlike Miss Al Ghul, whom just showed up at his doorstep with a ten year old.
Master Bruce had such… eclectic choices in romantic parents. At least the Fenton’s weren’t villains or heroes, though they definitely were some flavor of mad scientist.
But who was he to judge. His own paramours were not people one could call … conventional.
Master Bruce must have inherited that trait from himself.
Nevertheless, Alfred now had a new mission to focus on.
The mansion was to have guests soon and he needed to inform Master Bruce his brood had expanded while he was away.
Alfred has set up three rooms, one too many he thinks, but one can never be certain, goes down to the bat cave, with a fresh batch of pastry goods, waits, seated, for Master wayne and brood to return.
The screech of the batmobile can be heard.
"Bruce, we need to talk, young sirs and young ladies, please, leave us, post haste, take a pastry with you" Alfred speaks before anyone can get a word in.
All of Bruce's brood, take their preferred pastry, and leave Bruce in the thick of it.
"Alfred, what is it, it sounds serious" Bruce asked taking his cowl off.
"Remember Madeline and Jackson Fenton's,"
"Well, uh, I do"
"Their son Daniel Fenton, who has a birthday in February has no relation to Jack Fenton"
Bruce squints his eyes in deep thought, "ok and you bring this up why?"
Alfred, looking disappointed, world's greatest detective, his ass "9 months before, you and the couple, were in a intimate relationship no"
Bruce, gears turning, but he doesn't want them to turn "I have another kid, Alfred, request them to come visit please"
Alfred sighing "already on it master Bruce, should I tell Madeline and Jackson your room is open, or no"
Bruce walks away.
Alfred "duly noted sir, they will be here with young master Daniel, and young lady Jasmine in a week from now"
Bruce sighs "you already made plans, thanks Alfred"
---
The ghosts of Martha and Thomas, who are watching over their third.
"we have another grandson and granddaughter. Yay"
"but did it have to be with the ghost hunters, they nearly caught you in that box, I just barely got you out of it"
In what felt like no time at all the Ghost Assault Vehicle was packed with their weekend bags and the Fenton Family was barreling down the highway toward Gotham.
Danny hadn’t even gone to school that next Thursday morning, too lost in reeling thoughts to care about taking the day off - Jazz had called him out sick for the next two days, and she’d sounded shaken enough as well that the school office worker hadn’t questioned it.
Neither of the siblings had spoken much since the big reveal, both trying to wrap their heads around everything their parents kept excitedly gabbing about as they tossed photo albums, travel toiletries, and ghost weapons into a suitcase. But they sat close in the back seat of the GAV, supporting each other emotionally as well as physically through Jack’s merging and screeching curves.
Danny had at least texted Sam and Tucker Thursday morning to let them know he wouldn’t be in classes and was taking off to Gotham for a few days. He wasn’t sure how to say “hey turns out my dad isn’t my dad - well he still is but not my bio-dad - guess what it’s Bruce Billionaire Wayne! Haha, whodathunkit? Two himbo fathers for the price of one! Turns out my mom has a type” so instead he just asked his friends to take notes for him and keep their ghost weapons and extra thermos close in case the Box Ghost or Klemper showed up.
They knew to call if something major popped up. Sam told him to take pictures of the cool gargoyles all over the city, and Tucker said if he had time to visit a Wayne Tech store for the newly released memory bank he’d send Danny the money to pick it up for him. Danny responded to both messages with a thumbs up and tried to avoid thinking about the added squirming in his guts at the thought of being related to the guy who owns the company that pays the inventors of those memory banks.
On paper the drive between Amity Park and Gotham was about 11 hours, but Jack’s driving shortened that to 8 1/2 even with a couple bathroom stops and fast food drive-throughs.
The closer they got to Gotham the more Danny felt like puking those chicken nuggets back up. He must have made some kind of noise when he saw the “Welcome to Gotham” road sign lit by the setting sun behind them because Jazz reached over and held his hand.
“It’s just two days,” she whispered, also looking a bit sick but meeting his eyes intently. “Friday and Saturday here, then we leave early Sunday morning to drive home. Just two days. This doesn’t change anything between us, Little Brother.”
“Of course not,” he responded immediately, then gave a weak grin. “It’s not like I could donate you a kidney since my accident anyway. And a DNA change didn’t stop me before so why let it now, yeah?”
“That’s the spirit.”
They both snorted at the unintended pun, and entered Gotham laughing.
Pulling up to Wayne Manor was a shock even though they knew a little of what to expect. What they didn’t expect was Bruce Wayne himself walking out the front door to greet them, and Jack launching himself out the abruptly parked GAV with a shout of “BRUCIE!!” to literally scoop the man up into his arms and plant a kiss right on the billionaire’s mouth.
Maddie laughed and jumped down from her seat to walk over, “Let him down, honey, so I can say hi too!”
Bruce was smiling widely as his feet touched back on ground and he leaned down to give Maddie a peck on the lips, holding her hand as he kept the other hand on Jack’s chest. Jack in turn had a hand on each of their hips as they stood in a tight circle.
Danny just stared. The whole scene looked… so normal? Sweetly domestic?
His parents had packed up the hazmat suits in their luggage and worn what they call their “on-the-town clothes.” Not date-night clothes, but nice outfits. He honestly hadn’t been paying much attention to them during the morning pack-up and long drive, but seeing them greet their old flame in real people clothes, acting like humans with a past instead of scientists with a lab in the basement… Danny felt like he was in a different universe. He knew logically that they had lives before him and Jazz were born but it really struck him in that moment.
And then Bruce Wayne looked up and their eyes met and everything came crashing back.
Grian's new episode (9th one) has this phrase and… please tell me that I am not the only one who noticed it and had already created some scenarious with watchers or angst :{
Being an adult in this recession and being like wow I am totally "splurging" on 3 new sets of cotton underwear and 3 pairs of socks like whoaaaaa hold your horses duke of the land where's all this money gonna come from
when boy bands sing a love song addressed to the listener does that imply all 5-10 of them are in love with you at once. that seems like a lot of pressure i don't know if i want to be the nucleus of the boyband polycule.
