- [x] Yes Mash treats both Lancelot’s differently. No we don’t know exactly why. Please avoid asking her or Galahad may take over and punch you with their shield. No I’m not sure how you punch someone with a shield but Galahad can do it.
- [x] Yes Goredolf if only in his twenties. Yea his mustache adds 20+ years. No he will not be shaving it. His has a massive baby face but you didn’t hear that from me.
- [x] If you are going to quote pop culture to a servant you must be prepared to explain the reference and expose them to the source
- [x] To the individual who keeps hiding realistic white bunny toys in Tristan’s room please stop. He has trauma from the Beast of Caerbannog and you are being insensitive.
- [x] To the individuals who keeps throwing cheese at Medb, it was only funny the first 12 times, she has learned to dodge and Emiya is upset you are wasting perfectly good Gouda.
- [x] Please stop giving Lancelot parenting advice. No matter your intention he will take it the wrong way and no one wants another “Dangerous Beast incident”
- [x] To whomever spray painted Mari’s armor green, congratulations you not only pissed off a berserker but you gave Gawain a panic attack.
- [x] To the person who decided it was a good idea to try and shave Fou. Congratulations, Merlin said something stupid which has redirected Fou’s justified rage, you can now come out of hiding.
- [x] If you see a little white dog playing with Lobo don’t worry, that’s just Caval II and Lobo either thinks Cavall II is one of his pups or his mate, not sure which.
- [x] Please stop using Kintoki as a phone charger, it was only funny the first 23 times and Kintoki has a habit of overloading the battery, do you know how hard it is to get a smart phone these days? This rule also applies to Fran, Tesla and Edison.
- [x] If you are going to use the flames servants create to see which is best for roasting marshmallows, please ensure you have someone from the science division documenting the experiment
- [x] To whoever showed Leonidas 300, you are grounded.
- [x] Please stop trying to use movies/books/video games as summoning catalysts. There is a not zero chance you will succeed and frankly we don’t want be sued for copyright infringement
- [x] Please stop trying to get Mash drunk, it’s not good for Ritsuka’s heart.
- [x] If the Knights of the Round Table say they are looking for their Queen point them in last place you saw Shirou Emiya.
- [x] Gilgamesh is not a Swiss Army knife
- [x] If you see Saber Gilles losing control you have Jeanne’s permission to poke him in the eyes. It’s for his own good. It’s not as effective on Caster Gilles but the nostalgia will calm him down.
- [x] This is a multi faith household and if I here anything that sounds like a holy war you will lose TV time for a month
- [x] Give manicures to Cursed Arm at your own risk
- [x] Tota is the undisputed Food Fight champion, get over it.
- [x] Please place your world domination plans on hold until we confirm there is a world to dominate. The same applies to destroying the world as you can’t destroy what’s already destroyed.
- [x] No major remodels without permission, this includes taking down walls so you can share a double apartment with your boyfriend, Iskander
- [x] No turning unused areas into swimming pools. This rule applies to ice rinks as well
- [x] Stop following the knights of the round table with coconuts and making horse noises. ON a related note Kojiro does not know anything about the airspeed velocity of unladen swallow, it doesn’t mater if it’s African or European, he only used Asian swallows.
- [x] Please refrain from stroking the egos of the Gilgamesh or Ozymandias more than necessary, the structural integrity of Chaldea cannot contain that much inflated ego in one place.
- [x] No Ozymandias and the Gilgamesh do not realize the other isn’t complimenting them. Please do not inform either party. The battle would be glorious but frankly we live here and don’t want to lose all our stuff.
- [x] Please inform the proper channels if you plan on using the simulator for LARPing. One of the new servants got lost and thought the simulator was a new singularity and almost took Jingle’s foot off.
- [x] No using other servants visage to promote produces without their written permission.
- [x] To those of you who enjoy being berated by Andersen a bit too much for it to be considered appropriate for the work place, please at least try to remain professional when on the clock.
- [x] No playing keep away with others glasses. This goes double for the Medusa’s.
- [x] Chocolate is not moldable clay, it is meant to be eaten. If you don’t want your chocolate creations eaten please make your wishes clear
- [x] To whomever dyed David, Achilles and Ozymandias’s hair red, I don’t care if it’s “historically accurate” you nearly gave Romani a heart attack and he refuses to leave his room, we aren’t sure why but let’s try and avoid taking our leaders out of commission.
- [x] For reference the Emiya Brothers are Shirou Emiya (OG), Archer Emiya (F/SN), Nameless Emiya (Extra), Emiyu (Miyu’s Shirou), Shadow Emiya (Singularity F) Edgemiya (Emiya Alter), Femiya (Female Emiya), and Kuro Emiya (Shirou Alter). Special mentions go to Angra Mainyu who Iri has declared her adopted son, and Senji Muramasa who Iri has declared her father in law.
- [x] Please refrain from using your abilities to try and seduce extra servings from the Emiya brothers. They all possess Dense EX, your flirtations will not only not work but will also raise the ire’s of the SaberFace, RinFace, SakuraFace, IllyaFace, Miyu, Luvia/Astraea and any other servants who have legitimate crushes on our favorite chefs whether they admit it or not.
- [x] Warning if you are caught body shaming anyone the Casters have full permission to temporarily transform you into the body type you were just shaming.
- [x] Concerning Ritsukas pronouns. They prefer They/Them but also accept He/Him in male form and She/Her in female form.
- [x] Servants please be warned, any changes made to your Saint Graph may result in the creation of a new Servant. See Swimsuit and Santa servants for reference.
- [x] In order to stave off cabin fever, Chaldea is now officially recognizing and endorsing the formation of clubs in order to keep everyone occupied. If you wish to form a club, please fill out the necessary paperwork with the HR/Morale department. Note all applicants need at least two members to create an official club. Only official clubs will receive stipends to keep their clubs running. Every member of Chaldea is assigned a specific club stipend which can only be used in clubs. Note you can join as many clubs as you want but it will not increase your stipend and it will be spread out between all the clubs you join.
- [x] While it is not unusual for Servants to join clubs based on their country of origin it is not required. Example, Lancelot is French but is firmly in Britain’s Round Table Club
- [x] While joining a club is not required it is recommended if only to stop other servants from hounding you to join theirs.
- [x] You cannot punish a servant for crimes their template committed. Servants are effectively clones of those who gave entered the throne of heroes and you cannot punish a clone, regardless of the fact they may or may not retain their originals memories, for the crimes of their Template. However if they continue those crimes in this lifetime you are allowed to punish them within reason.
- [x] If you wish to make any “improvements” to Chaldea you must have permission first. No one wants the cafeteria collapse because someone decided to build a swimming pool, again.
- [x] That’s it ya’ll need therapy and the second we find/summon a competent therapist who isn’t part of a sex cult I’m making it mandatory.
- [x] Warning, the Emiya Brothers have declared the next person to start a food fight will be forced to only eat MRE’s for a month. They are serious people, they are tired of people wasting food, be glad they are only targeting the initiator and not all of us.
- [x] If you are going to break the rules at least be smart about it
- [x] Please stop materializing right in front of the staff, it’s not good for their hearts
- [x] If your club wishes to reserve a venue within Chaldea they must submit a request within 24hrs. It is first come first serve and it’s up to you to convince the club that reserved the space first to either give it up or share it. If violence is used to procure the venue your club will not only lose the venue but lose club privileges for a month.
- [x] No we cannot forcibly disband clubs just because they mess with your sensibilities. Frankly we would rather have Servants do “improper” things in the clubs than do it where we can’t stop it before it’s too late.
- [x] While the Emiya brothers take requests they are not obligated to follow through on those requests.
- [x] Please stop submitting requests for fetishized Mystic Codes to be made for Ritsuka. Yes Ritsuka’s male form has the legs to pull off a mini skirt. Yes Ritsuka’s female form would look great in a butler’s suit. No we will not force Ritsuka to wear them by giving them awesome spells.
- [x] Do not tell the Mages association that Ritsuka is somehow “catching” solved singularities and putting them into pocket dimensions they have coined World Seeds. I don’t care how awesome and world changing it is, we don’t want Ritsuka to send up with a sealing designation. ~Amendment: this applies to Lostbelt and “Event” singularities too.
- [x] Servants who like playing in the snow, please remember have a buddy and to check in every four hours so we don’t worry you were forgotten about after the kid servants buried you in snow and turned you into a snow mermaid. It took us hours to find Teach last time.
- [x] To whomever put a full sized Aquarium in the third loading bay, we know it was you Jeanne Archer, please restore the loading bay to its original state and submit a remodeling request this time. I don’t care if the kids love your dolphin show, you need permission first.
- [x] Heracles please stop trying to rip Teach limb from limb. If he was actually guilty you could but he is innocent of any child involved crimes.
- [x] Servants are not guinea pigs. If you want to try a new concoction/spell/ritual involving Servants you must have the permission of the servant in question, Ritsuka, and the acting director.
- [x] To avoid confusion the Artoria’s are getting official nicknames. Artoria (Saber), Alteria (Saber Alter), Lily (Saber Lily), Santer (Alter Santa), Archuria (Archer) Alrideria (Alter Rider), Castoria (Caster), X (Mysterious Heroine X), Lalter (Lancer Alter), Lartoria (Lancer), Alcas (Caster Berserker), Aruleria (Lancer Ruler), Ecchan (Mysterious Heroine X Alter), XX (Mysterious Heroine XX), Xxalter (Mysterious Heroine XX Alter), Mixa (Mysterious Idol X Alter) and Logres (Lord Logres). Note this list will most likely be expanded later.
- [x] No using Saint Quartz to try and make light sabers. Da Vinci already tried, it doesn’t work, move on
- [x] If you are going to use abstract concepts such as youth or beauty to gamble, bet your own youth or beauty of whatever, not someone else’s, I don’t care if you are their parent, king or god, consent is sexy and betting something that doesn’t belong to you is cringe.
- [x] Chaldea has a strict recycling policy (being marooned in space time means little supplies are coming in) please place your trash into the appropriate receptacles.
- [x] Please don’t ask what’s in the emergency mana pills. All you need to know is they contain Ritsukas ethically sourced excess mana and can keep a servant going in the world seeds for a month straight without Ritsuka being near them. You really don’t want to know what’s in them.
- [x] If it’s Japanese themed nonsense it’s probably GudaGuda. If it’s Space themed nonsense it’s probable Serverse. If it’s Christmas themed it’s probably Santa Servants. If it’s Halloween themed it’s probably Elizabeth. If it’s a random fighting tournament it’s probably Nero or Gilgamesh.
- [x] Please do not tell Jasil that Amakusa is Santa Island Mask. Yes it’s obviously him wearing Mozart’s mask but Jasil hasn’t figured it out yet and Jalter threatened to set the last person who tried on fire and Jeanne agreed with her.
- [x] Please remember to take period accurate currency into singularities. They may be forgeries but it’s still better than dropping a twenty dollar bill in Orleans, Mozart
- [x] If you are arrested in a singularity you are not allowed to break out of jail right away, call Chaldea and Ritsuka will decided if and when to pay the fee/bribe the sheriff/stage an over complicated prison break due to boredom. If you are not freed within seven days you are allowed to break out but you can’t use any of your skills, NPs, or beyond human traits. Consider it test of your skills.
- [x] Mozart is not allowed in Orleans unsupervised. ~ revision Mozart is not allowed anywhere unsupervised.
- [x] Ritsuka has specifically requested that no one turn them into a Magical Girl. They are willing to be a mascot or mysterious love interest but not a Magical Girl. They have magical girl related trauma from Zelretch and the Prisma Opal incident.
- [x] No you may not use Gilgamesh’s youth potion to deal with your wrinkles.
- [x] No stealing from singularity natives. However if you are attacked and are forced to non lethally defend yourself no one will complain if you take victors spoils/dropped items.
- [x] Please avoid killing singularity natives unless doing so puts your primary mission in danger.
- [x] If you want to learn how to fight sentient beings without killing then please see Mash, she’s really good at using the back of her shield.
- [x] Please stop asking the casters to create magical items based on fiction. They have a backlog and are currently stuck on how to keep people from falling into the Bag of Holding prototype. If you do have a suggestion please place it in the suggestion box outside Da Vinci’s workshop.
- [x] Please do not give Servant moonshine to humans, their stomach lining can’t handle it.
- [x] If you have blackmail material and a third party steals it, you cannot simply demand it back as doing so would lead to exposing the blackmail material thus rendering it useless. You are allowed to steal it back though.
- [x] No attempting to “improve” another’s NP with out their permission. One of their counterparts okay is not considered permission. The NPs traced by the Emiyas are not subject to this rule
- [x] All clothing must have a label identifying its owner. this is to prevent laundry mix ups or accidentally reignite the great Panty War of 20XX.
- [x] Please stop forcing Fou into cute outfits. He’s plotting vengeance, I just know it. Seriously do you not notice the murderous glares he gives you once you turn around?
- [x] Please refrain from weaponizing mistletoe. Frankly there is a real threat of reigniting Ragnarok.
