It's interesting to see this post a second time bc the first time my response was only, "Checks out. Ugh." But the second time, looking back at my responses to things throughout life, I obviously experience the same goddamn thing. All the time! We all do, to some degree.
I'm not talking about gay and black people or interracial couples in media and society, etc etc, but like... idk, mundane stuff like fandom antis, right? It's a small population, but it's so incredibly grating on fandom enjoyment, that it feels like some fandoms are completely overrun. "Everyone in that fandom is a hater."
Or, oh, far less mundane example — homophobic comments!
I see ONE person in a reddit thread be homophobic (or a few if it's a large comment section, whatever the equivalent of 5% would be), and I'm thinking "Oh, they HATE us hate us over there." Bc I'm also, emotionally, still upset over the homophobic comment I read last week when my browser loads this next one. (ADHD probably doesn't help lol. Last week can easily feel like yesterday or even five minutes ago.)
The fact that I didn't even remember/notice being upset in all the intervening time between then and now is irrelevant. The fact that I read 20+ threads between then and now without a single peep of homophobia is also irrelevant.
The brain doesn't really care about small details like "facts."
It felt afraid/threatened then, and it feels afraid/threatened now, and it's starting to develop a certain ~sense, a subconscious wariness, about the experience of going on reddit.
(Which... that wariness likely makes it hyper-vigilant and more likely to notice homophobic comments it might have otherwise skimmed over, reinforcing the experience.)
Thus, over 15 years, I have become convinced that Reddit is informational (esp in the age of Google becoming useless), BUT is also irredeemably homophobic, racist, sexist, etc. etc. despite the fact that I mostly curate my experience and stay off egregiously unpalatable subreddits.
Some things feel threatening for good reason. Racism, homophobia, misogyny are scary bc they can portend real harm. (Even fandoms with too many fans willing to harrass and death-threat others can result in real harm.) It's good to know how to deal with that fear, but the fear isn't unwarranted.
Other things, like seeing a black person at a shopping mall, you know, doing their shopping... or seeing a somewhat broad-shouldered woman in the ladies' room going about her business, you know, going into a stall or washing her hands... these things are threatening bc someone has conditioned others to consider these things threatening.
Who did it? Why? What did they stand to gain from your fear?
Generally — money, power, and control on a scale that the casual pleb racist/transphobe doesn't get so much as a whiff of.
Unfortunately, these aren't questions people are asking themselves so... we continue to try to integrate through education (history, science, critical race theory) and through exposure in non-threatening contexts (sesame street, will & grace).
Idk what's so threatening about topless women in public, nipples are generally quite dull and soft and can't hurt you, but whatever it is, perhaps we can import more European films to finally free that nipple, idk.
