simp for madara

🍒celestino/28/bi-ace/they/them🍒 🌸just a simple madara uchiha and sakura haruno simp, also multishipper trash🌸💮if you don't like anything I reblog oh well💮

[bigbosscangotohell]

years ago i watched this p/orn and the girl was screaming ‘oh god!! oh god!!!’ and the dude was like ‘there are no gods here’ and to this day it haunts me wtf was he talking about

[byjove]

cis people will say “I found out I’m having a baby girl at my anatomy scan and I’m experiencing gender disappointment” but be mad when you say “who knows? maybe you’ll end up with a son anyway”

[byjove]

they found this post and they’re very very in their feelings about it

[blue-eyes-white-cheddar]

Cis people will basically just sag “I’m sexist” and you say “maybe you don’t have to be” and they say “well now I’m gonna be transphobic too”

[paperrrat]

[lesbianshepard]

Sometimes I think that I’m moderately intelligent and then I realize how frequently I’m deceived by things meant to fool wild animals

[dannyvantass]

why leave half of the post in the tags this is amazing

[lesbianshepard]

being mildly nearsighted keeps me humble

[gumi-megpoidd]

I am whatever gender has the shortest line at the bathroom

[gumi-megpoidd]

No need I think

[maxi-is-not-well]

​I see this one going places

[gumi-megpoidd]

Yeah. The bathroom

[im-a-vertebrate]

ah but which bathroom

[gumi-megpoidd]

the one with the shortest line did you not read the post

[lizziemack]

[cherrishnoodles]

i hate you shein i hate you temu i hate you amazon i hate you microtrends i hate you fomo culture i hate you aesthetic restocking videos i hate you constantly on the grind mindset i hate you overconsumption i hate you fast fashion i hate you tiktok influencers i hate you i hate you i hate you

[allsadnshit]

Being an adult in this recession and being like wow I am totally "splurging" on 3 new sets of cotton underwear and 3 pairs of socks like whoaaaaa hold your horses duke of the land where's all this money gonna come from

[nitw]

i fucking hate being an adult with a slowly increasing number of responsibilities its like one day you wake up and youre like aw fuck when was the last time i descaled the coffee machine

[nitw]

"theres gonna be a power outage tomorrow welp i better boil some water in advance!" "oh gee looks like its time to vacuum the carpet!" GET REAL?????? YOU SOUND INSANE

[nitw]

someday youre gonna be out of baking soda when it matters most and its gonna destroy you

[scratch-meowt]

my hottest take

[keeper-of-the-flames]

Counter point, those machines can make me a peach sprite.

[pusheenthenerdcat]

guys did you know the tech in that nefangled machine revolutionized preemie healthcare

[maimonideznuts]

[pusheenthenerdcat]

yeah the guy who invented them made incredibly precise infusion pumps (as opposed to gravity fed ivs) which not only meant they could give medications to teeny tiny babies safely, it's also used for insulin pumps and portable dialysis machines. the key element is that it's a peristaltic pump so the liquid stays in sterile tubing for safety

(unholy drink cloaca uses it to dispense precise amounts of flavored sugar syrup)

[hedgebotherer]

Then how the haters loved him,

As they shouted out with glee,

"Unholy Drink Cloaca

You'll go down in history!"

[duskydestra]

Happy birthday to AO3 🎂🎉

[transformativeworks]

When I opened tumblr this morning:

[anidiotlearning]

Drew this a while ago and I don't have anyone to show it irl, and I was taken by a mad impulse to create a tumblr at 3am and so here we are posting naruto fanart in *looks at watch* 2025

[allthingswhumpyandangsty]

ao3 turns 16 today.

reblog if you’re older than archive of our own

[daggerdoggy]

Hey bro on a scale of nothingburger to everythingbagel how would you rate our gay sex last night

[xxviolet]

❄️

[ltwilliammowett]

This video depicts a moment that is nearly impossible to observe: a sperm whale surfacing with a giant squid clenched between its teeth. These predators hunt at depths exceeding 800 meters, where light does not penetrate, and only biosonar directs the pursuit. Consequently, clear surface images are exceedingly rare.

🎬: @lud_adventure

[strawbeary-moonlight]

This is, factually, the first footage of this that we have ever gotten. This has never been observed by a human being before in recorded history. The only reason we knew these whales ate those squids before was the beaks of the squids found in the stomachs of dead whales, and the battle scars on whales consistent with fighting giant squids.

My favorite thing about this clip is that, in the original uncropped footage, you can see her calf is right beside her, ascending from the depths along with her. Whale calves don't dive until they're taught by their mothers. It is very likely that this footage is of a mother whale teaching her calf to hunt on one of its very first dives.

When I saw this footage for the first time, I cried a little tbh.

[isaacsapphire]

Arising from the inky depths with a delicious giant squid snack… with mama.

[mal-studyblr]

hey quick PSA but “reading before bed to wind down” only works if you’re normal about books btw. if you aren’t you are going to end up awake at 2:52am after finishing the whole book just trust me on this one

[evilwizard]

i have hidden a golden ticket in one of my posts, and whoever finds it will get to go on a Marvelous Tour of my Whimsical Tower in which I Will Not Kill You and You Will Not Be Killed .

[evilwizard]

you will Not be chopped up and used for spell components, let me make that clear

[evilwizard]

ignore the Doompa Loompas

[dieuwt]

Doompa Loompa Gloomity Grain

The tower's a trap and they'll cut you in twain

Doompa Loompa Wiggity Woo

The spells in these books run on pieces of you!

[evilwizard]

could you guys shut tf up for once