(ﾉ･ｪ･)ﾉ･*☆ @noogetz - Tumblr Blog

Jesus it's been ages since I last updated this.

Hi hello. In the last 6 years or so I've:

- gotten married

- became a full stack developer

- bought a house

Woweezowee. I figured it's time I dust this thing off with Twitter dying and all.

doggosource

homopower

I literally felt stress leave my body watching this.

goaliesarethebest

I love him, I hope he’s having a good day.

tastefullyoffensive

Close enough.

i-amal-m-deactivated20220218

Adorable 😩❤❤

fat-birds

BABY

parentheticalaside

The only acceptable reason for this is if this character is actually a demon who seduces men and then eats them. [source]

blacklaceandcombatboots-deactiv

who wrote this, expose him

ofools

my breasts are nicely separated. Completely divided, every year they move apart by half an inch.

tobjoernebaer

My breasts are nicely separated though they still fight for custody of the children.

tyradicalsaurusreg-deactivated2

I,,a woman,,,am WiDeR LOweR dOwN

lesbian-lizards

That was difficult to read.

didi-is-spiffy-deactivated20190

So ugly

beforeliteracytherewasdeez

My name is Ebony D'arkness Dementia Raven Way, and my breasts are nicely separated

sunnysrecovery

OH MY GOD WHAT IS THAT AND HOW ON EARTH DID IT GET PUBLISHED

bonitabreezy

You can always tell when it’s a man writing a description because they focus oddly on the breasts. There will always be something about breasts and I can’t tell you how many times I’ve read historical or fantasy fiction and they talk about “her breasts hanging freely under her tunic” or what the fuck ever and it’s like…women don’t do that? We don’t describe ourselves by saying “I have blonde hair and blue eyes and my breasts hang freely under my tunic”. I kind of feel like we should counter by awkwardly mentioning all male character’s balls in their description. It’s kind of in the same vein.

imoldbutimstillintothat

“I have auburn hair and hazel eyes and my copious nicely separated balls hangs freely under my breeches”

lyriumandbiotics

G E T W I D E R L O W E R D O W N

ventrue-rosary

“To get back to my body”

starlitsylveon

synonym-for-life

This is the first time I saw this post with art and I am in tears.

l0vegl0wsinthedark

Reblogging again because IT HAS BEEN ILLUSTRATED NOW 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

thenatsdorf

myunrealisticfiction

He got mad as helllll

robotlyra

Turns out getting pissed off at inanimate objects refusing to work properly is a feeling that extends into the animal kingdom

gifbro

4gifs

Tasha isn’t ready to come back inside. [video]

weloveshortvideos

x

rynabuns

what on earth

edvardgrieg-official

please if you do anything useful in your life, don’t scroll past this

watch it

PLEASE

whyisthisfrenchguymasturbating

tchaikovsky is proud

tinker-tanner

In case anyone is baffled by this, there’s a Tchaikovsky piece in which there’s supposed to be a loud sound but he never specified what you should use to make that sound. People have done all kinds of weird shit depending on how they think the sound should, well, sound. Hitting a large piece of wood with a sledgehammer is a relatively conventional one.

bettydraperlookingpissed

goldkat-g0negrey-deactivated201

reblog the Don Draper of getting a job he’s unqualified for and you’ll have 10 years of getting jobs you’re unqualified for

mediocrepresident

YES

fortangel

No but my dad actually did this at McDonalds in the 70s!

So here’s a true story: my father, sometime in the 70s was looking for his first job. He went to the local McDonalds and told the staff, [manager’s name] said I was supposed to start today. They took his word for it and started training him and by the time the manager saw him and asked who he was, people just said “oh that’s the new guy.”

Somehow this actually worked. My dad worked there for a couple of years as a cook. He even won an award plaque which he had on the wall until the day he died.

trilllizard666

Confidence Helps

advanced-procrastination

Me, walking into FBI Headquarters:

“Name’s Burt Macklin, I work here now.”

creativekarma0

Me walking into Translation

batfamcreys

gailsimone

These pages have been going around a lot lately. It;s from a story I wrote for Wonder Woman’s 75th Anniversary Special, and I am reblogging to make sure that the artist/co-creator, Colleen Doran, gets proper credit for making Star-Blossom so adorable! :)

tethmos-deactivated20180313

This cured my depression

yourplayersaidwhat

Literally just started a new campaign, DM gives us all 3 gold coins each and we are in an inn for the night.

Dragonborn: I approach the counter, ask for some tobacco to put in my smoking pipe.

DM: “Very Well” the inn man says “How much?”

Dragonborn: I put a gold coin in the counter “This will do”

DM OOC: DUDE, WTF?

Drgonborn OOC: What? I smoke a lot

DM: THATS,,, You know what, OKAY! - The Inn guy laughs “Okay kid” and goes to the back, only to come back rolling a BARREL of tobacco. “Here you go”

Dragonborn OOC: OH,,,,, a Gold coin is a lot more then i thoug-

DM OOC: NOPE, now u gotta carry this around, BETTER SMOKE ALL OF IT!

Now all the Dragonborn stealth roles are in disadvantage because he is carrying a giant barrel around and refuses to trow it away because it was literally 1/3 of his money.