Hermione in the Friendzone
I always fucking hated Hermione’s attitude in the 4th and 6th books toward Ron.
Like, the Yuleball thing. Up until then, she treated Harry and Rom equally. She didn’t make any distinct impression that she felt differently toward Ron than Harry. And both of them treated her generally the same.
So I never got how it was fair that she was mad at him for not asking her to the ball. She gave him no overt indication she was interested in him, so why would he risk ruining the friendship? And why would she think he, whos shown no overt indication he was interested in her, would ask her? Because...she wanted him to?
She got offended that he didn’t assume she already had a date, although logically I would think if my best friend who I spent all my free time with got a date to the biggest event of the year that Im constantly talking about, my friend would mention it. If they hadn’t I wouldn't assume they got a date and just for some unknown reason didn’t tell me.
And, for some reason, it was his job to ask her. She wanted to go with him, as far as she knew (there was no way she knew he was also interested in her) he regarded her as a friend, but it was up to him to ask her, and in no way should she have had to ask him. It wasn’t even a question of whether he was actually interested in her or not. She was interested in him, therefore if he didn’t ask her to the dance he was an asshole.
Like, Krum asks her to the dance, she doesn’t say no and go ask Ron. She doesn’t ask Ron at all, she agrees to go with another guy, and gets pissed that Ron didn’t ask her. While she already had a date. He was not only suppose to guess she was into him while treating him 100% the same as she did Harry, but also ask her after agreed to go with someone else.
I can’t think of a single reason she wouldn’t have told them she had a date and was going with Krum other than wanting Ron to ask in some bizarre “ha! i already have a date so there!” thing. Refusing to tell them who after that looked like some even more fucked up attempt to shock him with how awesome of a date she got. Thats....severely fucked up when you realize the only indication she gave that she wanted Ron to ask her was absolutely nothing at all. (And it wasn’t to keep everyone from finding out she was going with a celeb and bothering her, both of them would have kept it secret. It wasn't just to punish Ron for asking her ‘as a last resort’ -Harry neither in case he told Ron- because she was already keeping it a secret before he asked.)
Like, if you have two people you treat exactly the same, and you get pissed when one of them doesn’t guess A) you're into one of them, and B) its them and not the other one, you’re a goddamn whackadoodle.
Now AFTER that, for the rest of the year, the next, and halfway through another the only evidence either of them had was her being upset he didnt ask her, and him being upset she went with Krum. Both reactions which can easily be misinterpreted as having platonic reasons (Hermione= treated like a last resort/him thinking she couldnt get a date. Ron= shes going with his sports idol, his well established jealousy over people getting attention/things he wants)
Again, neither of them have talked about it for about 2 years now, neither of them have given any other indications of interest.
Ron gets a girlfriend, and Hermione attacks him and refuses to speak to him.
Shes had 2 years to make a move. Just because 2 years earlier he was upset for a night that she went to a dance with a famous dude, doesn’t mean his choices are A) date Hermione B) date no one ever. Without her actually telling him at all shes into him, and without him showing any sign hes into her.
No, shes into him, therefore whether hes interested in her or not, he should never date anyone ever????
And asking him to go to Slughorns party is in no way an indication of her intrest. He spends weeks bitching to high fuck he can’t go. Theres a party where you can bring a date. Harry isnt going to take him, if my best friend offered to let me be their +1 to a event Ive been vocally complaining I want to go too, Id think they were being my best friend and doing me a solid, not that they want to bone me.
Especially if I basically lived with them for several months and spent every free moment for half a year with them and the only time they slightly indicated something might be going on is two years earlier saying “you shouldn’t have asked me as a last resort”. Which I would have taken as “im offended you thought I was last resort material” not “i wanted you to ask me using a flock of doves and fireworks come look at my research on wedding china”.
She hasn’t made any moves or any further expressions of interest, so he gets a girlfriend. And she gets to attack him? Refuse to speak to him, cause massive strain on her other best friend whos pretty fucking worried about the whole “being of pure evil trying to hunt me down and kill me”, and then on top of that specifically find the one person in the whole school that would piss Ron off the most to make him jealous???
Don’t even get me started on how we’re suppose to feel like hes a total jackass to her for being egotistical and trying to make out with her and shit. Hermione literally confunded him because of horrible things she heard him saying about Ron and Ginny and he knew he was totally self absorbed. And from the way its written, he didn’t try to make out with her, they did make out. From Jackasses point of view, he was making out with a girl who asked him on a date and then made out with him when he went in for it. Why would he assume she hated him and was totally grossed out by kissing him, and only asked him out and kept sucking face with him to make someone else pissed off? Shes making out with a dude who said shit about Ginny, too, one of her best friends. I mean thats goddamn low. She gives no shits if that upsets Ginny as much as Ron they both hate him. Just as long as Ron feels like shit for not dating her like she wants.
However shitty and gross Jackass Keeper was, that guy had no idea he was on a date with someone who hated him and was making out with someone who was utterly disgusted by it, and was going around saying shitty things about him. Basically she decided because she found him to be a jackass, she could humiliate him and ditch him like trash for being exactly who she knew he was when she asked him out, as long as it helps her make her best friend feel like a pile of dogshit for not dating her.
And THEN, knowing Ron insecurity over his Quidditch abilities, said she was only into “really good Quidditch players”. Thats right, someone she called her best friend didnt appear to reciprocate her feelings, so she publicly used his insecurities to insult and demean him. AND, knowing that shit like that could lead to him yet again questioning his skills (and if shes his best friend/into him, she has to know its not some petty ego thing, hes dealing with a lifelong inferiority complex) humiliating himself in front of the school. Possibly having an entire course of people singing about how poor he is, added in there.
What??? Listen, ok. Hermione physically attacked her best friend for not (as far as she knew) being into her, refused to speak to him, tried to start dating someone she knew he hated, and used his insecurities to make him feel like shit, and possibly humiliate himself in front of hundreds of people who will then sing abut his poverty ... to get back at him for not being interested in her (again, as far as she knew).
Basically, holy shit how is she in anyway in the right?
If you act totally platonic toward someone, who acts platonic toward you, but you are secretly into them, that is your job to pursue ask them. Your not entitled to them because you’re into them. You dont get to fucking attack them when they don’t ask you out.
And, yes, Ron WAS into her. But he didn’t expect her to ask him to the ball. He didn’t expect her to ask him to Slughorns party, he only got pissed she was going to yet another party he wasn’t invited too. He did get pissed off after Ginny said shit about her making out with Krum, but she didn’t know that.
Both of them were into eachother, neither of them let the other know, and it was up to themselves to make a move if they wanted. Neither of them had any right to get mad at the other for not guessing how they felt and making that move for them.
Like, could you fucking imagine if he set a flock of birds to attack her, leaving actual cuts all over her, when she went out with Krum or Jackass Keeper? How in any fucking reality is it ok for someone to physically attack someone and leave them covered in fucking cuts when they date someone else? Why in the fuck is it ok for her to do it, even putting it in a kids movie? Look, girls! If a you like a boy, and he asks out someone else, you cut him up and refuse to speak to him till he apologizes to you!
Basically, (from her point of view) Hermione was friendzoned and felt entitled enough to him that she believed it was ok to physically, emotionally and psychologically attack him as punishment for dating someone else, wont speak to him unless he apologies or stops seeing the other girl, and only stops being a totally horrible person to him hen he almost fucking dies.
And ya know what? When she showed up at Rons bedside, she had no clue he wasn’t still totally into Lavender. After doing all that shit to him, she actually shows up and snottily tells the girl shes been punishing him for dating that shes there because shes his friend thank you very much!
Could you, just for one second, imagine this reversed and in the real world? Two male and female platonic friends, the girl starts dating someone. The guy attacks her leaving her covered in cuts. Then he finds a girl he knows she hates and loudly says the new girl is in fact, better at the thing he knows the girl has serious anxiety issues over in an attempt to make her feel like shit about herself. Then! When oh no, shes been injured! Showing up at her bedside like he’s entitled to be there because hes got feelings for her despite what hes done, and telling her boyfriend (whos quite obviously pissed the guys there after everything the guys put his girlfriend through) that he has every right to be there.
Could you imagine anyone then using “but the girl actually had feelings for the guy” as acceptable reason to excuse the guy from doing something that left her covered in cuts?
Fucking imagine “well, he attacked her when they were teens and she got a boyfriend, then used a girl that she hated to play on her anxiety in a further attempt at revenge for not being into him, but guys, she actually WAS into him!!! Once he knew that, everything was good! Especially once she started making an effort to show him she was into him! Well, except that one time they had a fight and she left, and he ‘started punching every inch of her he could reach’ when she came back...But it was smooth sailing after that! They’re married with kids now!”