[narcissistcookbook]

"i've got no qualms about it" meanwhile i'm over here making qualm chowder

[horse-is-a-horse-of-course]

bad news kitten it looks like we're dying at sea

[botanyshitposts]

plants love being polyploid its one of their favorite things to be

[botanyshitposts]

you give animals an extra set of dna and they crumble into a little cartoon pile of ash. you give plants an extra set of dna and they say ahh finally an extra set of dna to do activities with

[afterword]

[biglawbear]

This is really funny on dark mode

[transfeminine-anarcho-post-egg]

On dark mode this is like a clown trying to hide behind a light pole.

[killy-deactivated20241228]

[evilwizard]

[charl0ttan]

yeah i have an outside husband lol i know its unethical but he just loves exploring

[notyourpunkprincess]

Are any of my mutuals on here anymore? This is a call into the void 😂 if you are, what are you up to, are you active on any other social media?

[reggiemess]

I love it when dogs try to help but the task at hand requires zero dogs so they just kinda stand in front of you and look serious.

[twitchytyrant]

middle aged men do this too

[alisonzai]

[dcbnam-aep]

this is how i feel whenever i open tumblr

[shiftythrifting]

Help her. 

Community Thrift, West Palm Beach FL

[hackercult]

“the internet didnt fuck me up but its fucking kids up now” i dont think it didnt fuck us up guys

[meangirlnurse]

tumblr post: women should not be obligated to wear makeup

bootlickers: just a little reminder though that it’s ok to wear makeup i wear makeup just a reminder it’s ok to wear makeup i like to wear makeup i have eyeliner wings sharp enough to kill a man why do you hate women who wear makeup i love wearing makeup let women do what they want wear makeup wear makeup wear makeup wear makeup wear makeup

[zitrontorte]

it’s a little more nuanced than that

[meangirlnurse]

actually “women should not be obligated to wear makeup” is not a statement that needs more nuance

[greelin]

here’s a concept: me, riding your ceiling fan like a gargoyle. you, smacking me with a broom. both of us are yelling

[mclennonyaoi]

“i am now heavy with child”

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

shirt that says "i hope the next thing i love kills me" on the front and a massive red rectangle on the back

[skelii-deactivated20230909]

kinda slays

[bunkey]

notice how everyone is horny today

[bunkey]

[clown-gender]

“Are we going to thrive? Are we going to thrive, Goosey, or are we going to wither? Are we going to thrive within the framework of the system or in spite of it? Ouch! That’s right, Goosey. I feel pain. I feel many types of pain.”

—My dad talking to our dog, Goose, first thing in the morning