resting lich face

Hi there, I'm Sage! 30s, stagehand, certified Ant Freak, lover of fantasy and history. Don't you dare go Hollow. bluesky: oddside.bsky.social

[mewvore]

"we detected a mature post" yeah I'm in my 30s

[swishersposts]

artists fuck better because we turn sex into art, masterpieces, mattresses become canvases where we can paint our love to someone with bodies.

[zsnes]

its like, impossible to come up with anything funnier than the experience of seeing this post

[targuzzler-deactivated20180224]

pharoahs fuck better because they ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh put the pussy in a scarmophogoghs

[nongunktional]

i really hate the way the "boobs vs butt" thing got broken down into this implicit idea that butt is the nobler stance. it's really stupid. personally im a woman guy. [realizes how that sounds] [purses my lips in thought] [nods confidently] im a woman guy

[glutko]

[graceofgosh]

🌱 EXTREMELY ROBUST SCALLIONS 🌱

do NOT scroll past the scallions. these are extremely robust. i did not seek them out, they were placed before me.

the produce misters had just run. the bundles were tight. the whites were WHITE. good fortunes await.

🧅 repost within 24 hours: robust scallions

🧅 repost within 1 hour: robust scallions + minor windfall

🧅 do not repost: limp scallions. flaccid stalk. the celery will look at you and it will know.

a man in Fresno scrolled past. his scallions went to seed the same evening. his dog stopped making eye contact.

a woman reposted immediately. she found $40 in a coat. her scallions have not wilted since March.

I AM NOT SAYING IT’S THE SCALLIONS. I’m saying look at them. good fortunes await. 🌱

[romanceyourdemons]

this is my first time in the pacific northwest. we drove through a forest so wet and foggy you couldn’t see the bends in the road ten yards ahead of you and it straight up felt like a horror game until we emerged into a sunny valley with a rainbow over it and then we went to a taco bell and in it there was a guy dressed like a hot dog and a guy dressed like hamburger. is it all like this

[again-please]

kitten i'll be honest daddy isn't sure he's cut out for full time employment

[angelicguy]

[estrogenesis-vaporeongelion]

top economists are saying today that so long as the coyote doesn't look down he will never fall

[femalegothic]

[captain-price-returns]

SENATOR DOWN!!!!

[fruitsoftheape100]

No Homo We Smokin Penisas

[destikneeschild]

I am having a full throttle giggle attack…I am dying. I need to get off this app & get chicken & pasta stat!!!!

[fakelaurent-deactivated20191028]

So so so fucking real

[nlog-sama]

i dont know what love island is but from what ive heard its like danganronpa for people that use snapchat

[desimonewayland]

Arnold Böcklin

Centaur Watching Fish, 1878

Kunsthaus Zürich

[halondrus]

The hardest part about dark souls isn't the combat or the bosses or any of that stupid shit it's making solaire not kill himself like a hamster following the red string of fate into the jaws of the family dog

[rosieandthemoon]

Excalibur (1981)

[were--ralph]

No one:

Men™️ taking a Big Manly Piss: