what a keikaku

As English as it gets. Autumn, 24 now what, yo peeps what up

[oneofthoseseasons]

if you can't handle me at my plinko, you don't deserve me at my blorbo

[swagpaws]

when u exit hyperfocus mode and ur immediately hit with every status effect ever

[verthanthi]

Oh fuck I gotta pee. Wait wait, I can’t stand up I’m gonna fall over. Shit I haven’t eaten in like 23 hours. Damn I’m thirsty, maybe I should— fuck why am I nauseous? Oh, I didn’t eat, right. It’s WHAT time? 3AM? Do I even have time to eat? Shit, I forgot to take my meds earlier. Or did I? Damnit. Why is my head pounding, oh, right, haven’t eaten and I’m dehydrated… fuck I still gotta pee

[maestrosmassacre-deactivated202]

[a-real-human-person-not-fake]

*minimizes word document and stands up* My body:

[onceiwashere]

when the microwave says my leftover pasta is ready but the middle is still cold 

[onceiwashere]

oh this is absolutely the wrong gif

[onceiwashere]

WHEN the microwave says my leftover pasta is ready but the middle is still cold 

[normal-horoscopes]

Gnomes of pleasure

[unbakehisbeans]

Gnomes of pain

[normal-horoscopes]

Gnomes of wind and gnomes of rain

[gunsandfireandshit]

Gnomes of wood and gnomes of grass,

Gnomes who'll kick your fucking ass

[powerburial]

Gnomes of day and gnomes of night

Gnomes of darkness and gnomes of light

Gnomes of life and gnomes of death

Gnomes of sickness and gnomes of health

[normal-horoscopes]

Come ye gnomes, come one and all

Gnomes of winter, spring, and fall

Let no year of gnome-war pass

Without kicking fucking ass

[inthefallofasparrow]

[belovedblabber]

Solas is so tragic. How did BioWare go ‘we are making an elven trickster god companion’ and then end up with ‘elf benedict cumberbatch negs you asmr’

[saltwaffle]

full offense but none of you would have ever survived fanfiction.net in 2009

[jetru]

remember when writers had to be all like: “omg omg lemon starts HERE” y’all are lucky that ao3 has tags and filters you can set

[domicileensnared]

Sometimes shit was marked “lemon” and it’d just be them making out, and sometimes they’d just start pissing on each other

No rules, no laws, you took your life into your hands opening fics

[frostyemma]

A/N: this contains SLASH, that means TWO MEN, if that makes you uncomfy, DON’T READ!

A/N: please don’t sue me, o anime overlords, I’m not making any money off of this! I’m just a broke student! I don’t have any money!

A/N: I totally wrote this while high off 10 Red Bulls wheeeeeee!!!!!

A/N: COMMENT if you want me to continue the next chappy!!!

[raimagnolia]

No, no, no

remember when there’d be interactions with the author and the characters?

InuYasha: I don’t get why I have to be here for this

A/N: Because it was in your contract!!1!1 *revs chainsaw*

[janekfan]

god those were lawless times. 

[the-apocryphal-one]

[e-v-roslyn]

[signerjarts]

“Jolene" 

 Your beauty is beyond compare

I shudder from your Eldritch stare 

With scaly skin and fins of emerald green

[feefal]

Growth stages of various mushrooms! from young spore to wisened, old granny fungi.

[pixelblitzer]

@zombieella​

[mythgenderedloki]

I'm sorry I had to...

[chaoticgouda]

shipment officers, gently nudging Ever Given with their 8 tugboats: Ever Given move out of the way please so you don’t block the entire global trade

Ever Given, her lamplights enormous: you SHOVE ever given? you shove her hull like the big boulder? oh! oh! no commerce for human! no commerce for human for One Thousand Years!!!

[melodaia]

[wizardpotions]

[occasionallydiverting]

hnnnngh, I’m trying to conduct global maritime trade, but I’m dummy thicc, and the clap of my hull plates keeps blocking the Suez Canal

[primevalthule]

http://www.tommyarnoldart.com/ 

[lunnefisk]

drake? where’s the horn of jurgen windcaller?

[crookedempathwombatdonut]

Michell is 29 Yеаrs & Wаnt t0 Fuск HERE

[lunnefisk]

michell the horn of jurgen windcaller isnt here we have to stay focused