threetequilafloor

[heijian]

not every single long sentence is a song title by fall out boy 

[parkway-nosedive]

there are two ways to read this

[fladurblegon]

i really haven't been right since the accident (my birth)

[sweatermuppet]

i don't want to start a free trial i want to own things for the rest of my life

[woman-becomer]

I'm on a noble quest to feel something

[woman-becomer]

things felt so far:

humidity

[woman-becomer]

shame

[evilwizard]

fyi i will be extending some dark tendrils across the sky later today. just a heads up

[darkhexqc]

The Red ones are mine try not to get tangled please

[evilwizard]

i thought we scheduled around this

[obeliskthetormentorsfeetpics]

i know its last second but is it ok if i send green lightening arching into the heavens while all this is going on?

[evilwizard]

for fuck’s sake guys

[corrosadaltedio-deactivated2020]

Blasphemia, 2018 Eliran Kantor

[huffy-the-bicycle-slayer]

I haven't seen dancing pumpkin guy ONCE this year, are you guys okay?

[huffy-the-bicycle-slayer]

FINE! I'll do it myself

[huffy-the-bicycle-slayer]

Why did 12 people reblog this today??? IT IS ONLY AUGUST!!!

[illinicoise]

“But if you forget to reblog Madame Zeroni, you and your family will be cursed for always and eternity.”

[spn-fandom-breathing-heavily]

not even risking that shit

[codyslipring-deactivated2015060]

scrolled past this, re-evaluated my life, then SCROOOLLLED back up and hit the damn reblog button. 

[tumblgang]

She ain’t no games in real life so I take her serious all the time

Anyone with a name that starts with a “Z”, ends with an “i”, and isn’t some kind of Italian pasta, IS SERIOUS

I’m not climbing no mountain with a pig on my back, 🙅🏽🙅🏾🙅🏿 Negative.

[skuubasally]

Nope. I know better, have your reblog Madame Zeroni.

[luckytaters]

who the fuck is Madame Zeroni

[saudadesinfinitas-deactivated20]

Look at these stupid children who don’t know who Madame Zeroni is

[drayaintshit-deactivated2019030]

☝🏾😂

[callmedeku24]

Man lissen if you don’t know you better ask somebody AFTER you hit the reblog button

[emeraldmercury]

Idk who she is but I have an exam today so I’ll reblog her

[haiku-robot]

idk who she is but i have an exam today so i’ll reblog her

^Haiku^bot^0.4. Sometimes I do stupid things (but I have improved with syllables!). Beep-boop!

[jacobmick]

Because wise, I am.

[seymonecristina]

Oh fucks no she’s back lmao must reblog. I’m sorry guys

[queenofravens01]

Considering the fuckery we already live in…. Not risking it.

[waitineedaname]

"we don't have girl talk, we have creature talk," my roommate Julia just said while rolling on the floor, "put that on your fucking tumblr, they'll love that shit"

[waitineedaname]

she just asked how many notes this post has and I told her eighteen and with restrained glee she said "this is going to do horrible things to my ego"

[waitineedaname]

I'm out of town rn but I told her this broke 500 notes and sent her some of yall's tags

[bugsybaritone]

Hey op why is the contact icon a T if their name is Julia? *condescending tone* do you have your roommate saved as “trash” in your phone?

[waitineedaname]

nope!

[frailbug]

it’s awesome how we have unlimited chances to become a better version of ourselves

[eagans]

(Anne Lamott, Bird by Bird)

[sexchangedotcom]

"tumblr's the only social media without algorithms!" "you can still be anonymous on tumblr!" "tumblr's so nice because you don't have to show your face!" WRONG tumblr is special because you can have 3000 followers and still get an average of seven likes a post. i'm doing stand up comedy at a packed venue and one person is laughing

[sexchangedotcom]

youre right im sorry beautiful

[i-am-a-fish]

I'm glad that people are still having fun on tumblr even after we found out about the frightening ghoul that reblogs posts but doesn't say anything

[the-frightening-ghoul]

‎

[goslinggf]

i feel like i'm going Italian

[goslinggf]

*insane

[omtai]

love the word “rapscallion”. like not only are you a rascal but you’re also kind of spring onion about it too

[girlwhoisnormal]

They should invent a job that i actually want to do

[rattle-my-stars]

[saucysage]

wear robes do magic serve cunt

[mindflamer]

there is still time. there is still time. until your bones are in the fucking ground there is still time.