It's Paradox Time~ @paradox-time - Tumblr Blog

damn [PRONOUN] your pussy is crazy!

the pussy:

while I am talking to you about something gay and stupid a mosquito lands on my arm and sucks all my blood out in an instant, swelling to the size of a person as my remains flutter cartoonishly down to the ground, and it continues the conversation where I left off in a high pitched approximation of my voice

I am now better at snake I think, I'm glad this is a feature

#tumblr snek

beemovieerotica

which 3 US presidents do you think would be the best omegas and which 3 bisexual pop stars would be their best matched alphas

1) John Adams

John Adams was a tireless advocate for the revolution (i.e. topping from the bottom) and he once described himself as "obnoxious, suspected, and unpopular" - "he was known for his bluntness, impatience, and tendency to be easily frustrated with those who disagreed with him." As a brat in Congress, his personality was repulsive, but everyone listened to him and they all still wanted him. They wanted him so bad they made him president. Kind of makes you think.

His match:

Adams needs someone with a strong personality to challenge his - someone who's not afraid to repel the mainstream in order to realize their vision. Gaga has it, and he needs it. "Bad Romance" in many way encompasses Adams' struggles through the 1776 Continental Congress. They could teach each other much.

2) Theodore Roosevelt

A man dedicated to the preservation of natural parks and ecological wonders - and for what? To run through the trees under the full moon as his pheromones wafted through the air? We know.

His match:

Grimes once described herself as becoming "way less gay" after she became pregnant, which is 1) weird, and 2) the reason I'm sticking her with Teddy. I don't think that he could fix her completely, but she seems the type to maintain no moral compass of her own, simply adopting the political ideology of whomever she's with, so maybe there's hope. Maybe Grimes could introduce Teddy to shrooms, and Teddy could take her out on trips in the forest. And then we can find out if Grimes getting a man pregnant makes her more or less gay.

3) Richard Nixon

Best known for his one legendary debate with the handsome JFK, wherein he became a stuttering, sweating mess, unable to focus or say what he meant. Interesting!

His match:

Bisexual icon Taylor Swift is also struggling to appease both sides of the political aisle. They could share their woes and their love of good ol' fashioned Americana, and then Taylor could tie him to the wall and make him bark like a dog. The pregnancy would be difficult on both of them with Taylor's extremely busy schedule, and Nixon would regrettably terminate it in the second trimester, causing a rift in the relationship that would never be mended. The resulting laments that Taylor composed about Nixon's abortion would of course be dissected and attributed to a secret relationship with a woman - Nixon's wife.

I welcome critical analysis.

destinationtoast

this website is so damn hard to explain to the outside world

grand-theft-carbohydrates

#terrible forever and ever #time to share

Im awful at snake why is this a feature

#tumblr snek

sorryitssmudged

just a cute little Sinosauropteryx

sunnfl0w3rr

nobody:

tumblr when Ides of March:

a-tian

i-still-am-distantstarlight

The Ides of March, coming soon to a coliseum near you. Knives not included.

mageless

🔪🔪🔪

Free knives!!! Take one on your way down the dash!

cyancees

yaoi between two beautiful knights who keep ending up fighting each other but it turns out both of them are pretending to be men in order to be knights so its actually secret beautiful butch yuri. picture this

cyancees

one is the handsome gentlemanly princely type with long hair riding on a white horse that all the ladies fawn over, the other is the badass grim bulky type with scars and a scowl and a big ass broadsword who always aura farms in the corner of the tavern alone

cyancees

yep exactly

thebristolboard

“The Militarization of the Police Department – Deadly Farce,” an original painting by Richard Williams from “The 20 Dumbest People, Events, and Things of 2014″ in Mad magazine #531, published by DC Comics, February 2015.

spaceraptor

Here’s the original, for comparison. And here’s a bit more about the artist and why he created the piece above for MAD Magazine.

pennamerequired

Richard Williams on Norman Rockwell:

“For most people, he was the painter of ‘America,’” he added. “But even he said his vision was what he wanted ‘America’ to be. It was a mythical ‘America,’ a place where all people were decent, honest and full of good will. His work was full of gentle humor that made you feel a little better; even if you knew it wasn’t really true… you just wished it was. My parody of Rockwell’s painting simply says, ‘That myth is dead.’”

1-420-666-6969

I think it’s relevant to add that even Norman Rockwell chose to leave his cushy job at the Saturday Evening Post because he wanted to make artwork that was more radical. The Post had rules that wouldn’t allow him to do artwork depicting black people as anything other than servants. The job paid really well and that was a huge reason he continued on. But he wanted change that and so he moved to Look magazine.

A lot of people know about the very first piece he did when he left the post which was the The Problem We All Live With which depicts Ruby Bridges walking to school under federal protection.

But I don’t think enough people know about Murder in Mississippi which depicts three real civil rights activists who were murdered by the Ku Klux Klan and sherriffs. The magazine ran the sketch instead of the finished piece because they felt it had a more striking statement to accompany the article. Norman Rockwell would finish that version after publication which is here

Rockwell’s legacy is sanitized because he decided to maintain his job at the Post for so long despite his frustrations with not being able to express himself. The civil rights movement was just his final straw to change what he could with the little time he had left. Look magazine received a lot of hate for Rockwell painting these as well.

Another favorite piece of mine is The Right to Know which depicts an integrated populace questioning their government. In 1968, the year of Vietnam and the year the Fair Housing Act only just got signed in months prior:

But I think it’s important to include the caption Rockwell originally wrote for the piece as well. I think it represents how a 74 year old Rockwell felt about the America he believed in and the people in it:

We are the governed, but we govern too. Assume our love of country, for it is only the simplest of self-love. Worry little about our strength, for we have our history to show for it. And because we are strong, there are others who have hope. But watch us more closely from now on, for those of us who stand here mean to watch those we put in the seats of power. And listen to us, you who lead, for we are listening harder for the truth that you have not always offered us. Your voice must be ours, and ours speaks of cities that are not safe, and of wars we do not want, of poor in a land of plenty, and of a world that will not take the shape our arms would give it. We are not fierce, and the truth will not frighten us. Trust us, for we have given you our trust. We are the governed, remember, but we govern too.

batboyblog

I’d just like to briefly say even Rockwell’s seemingly feel good Americana pieces are often more political than people today realize for example

likely the most famous picture of a Thanksgiving dinner ever painted and you see it all the time.

What you may not know is its actual title

“Freedom From Want” it’s a part of a series of 4, including this now famous meme

“Freedom of Speech” These paintings were illustrations of FDR’s “Four Freedoms” speech where The President laid out a vision that would become what the Allies were fighting for in WWII universal human rights that became a part of the UN charter.

So this homey American Thanksgiving scene was also a bold statement that no one in the world should go hungry

Rockwell’s work was very political, he used that Americana small town America vibe of his work to make what he was saying feel very close to the viewers he was trying to reach and also his optimism of the human spirt but for sure not blind to the need to build a better world.

synnthamonsugar

While they aren’t as poignient as his works relating to race, class & civic participation I would feel remiss reblogging this without pointing out some of his depictions of girls & women rejecting stereotypically feminine roles, since I think they’re supporting evidence toward the progressive messaging of Rockwell’s art and against the retvrning trad fascists’ attempt to appropriate his artistry.

A well known piece but one that resonated with me as a kid for showing that girls can fight (or fight back) and find joy in aggression, while also hinting that consequence exists for those who do so.

A girl unhappy with her role as babysitter, who isn’t naturally nurturing or well suited to taking care of children. This one resonated with me as a girl, and resonates with me as a woman who feels no natural inclination toward babies or mothering. I feel honored to have seen the original in person.

On a similar note to the previous one, a toy saleswoman who is obviously fed up dealing with children, rejecting the concept of an inborn affinity for caretaking.

This one from the 1960s exploring women’s changing role in society, quite literally contrasting one woman (and her daughter) looking back on a traditional model of femininity vs. a woman looking toward modernity. (As an aside, I personally love the fan interpretation that the two women are the same person, and the painting represents the choice between the traditional and expected life path, and something new and uncharted.)

And of course his Rosie the Riveter artwork that depicts a rather large, muscular, realistic-looking woman eating and handling heavy equipment versus the more glammed up and presentable Rosie the Riveter artwork that most people remember, and his Liberty Girl, likewise depicted as plain-looking and physically powerful, but which I’m not including because those were both culturally-acceptable models of femininity at their time. (The WWII era, after women were allowed into the workforce and before they were forced back into domesticity.)

dairypropaganda

Me watching iron lung: oh well I guess I don't have a choice in becoming a pretentious film major they made the movie too good and no one is being annoying enough about it

#iron lung #markiplier #mark fischbach #iron lung movie

hallowvamp

"How can you like these very toxic and horrible characters that have done despicable and unforgivable things?" oh it's quite simple actually, this is fiction and I think with my dick.