live a life of messy memories, not regrets

❗18+ONLY❗ Tj /22/she her/ requests open!! send me prompts or headcanons or just say hi dudes+dudettes https://ko-fi.com/cryptidclique

[pettyprocrastination]

PettyProcrastination 2021 Masterlist

Now yes I know this is an ugly masterlist, i plan on editing it and making it more pleasing to the eye, I’m just putting this out there as a placeholder for the time being so you all can find the things I’ve written with ease. Please let me know if there is a specific fic or character you’d like to be tagged in for the future. 

Simon “Ghost” Riley

Military Ball

Pretty Girl

Two Phantoms

Johnny “Soap” Mactavish

Mutt

König

Spooning with König

Big Bear

Marcus Pike

Of Molly Houses & Mourning Clothes

Dieter Bravo 

Extra Whipped Cream

1/2

Din Djarin

Braiding

I Met My Savior and His Name was Death

Shah-tezh and Keldabe Kisses

The Collective’s Affection

Javier Pena

BodyGuard intro HC

BodyGuard Protection HC

BodyGuard You meet Javi and Gemini HC

Frankie “Catfish” Morales 

Panty & Bambi 

Introductory BB Post (Cam Girl)

Frankie & BB do a show together HC (Cam Girl)

Frankie & BB how frankie stands out during shows HC (Cam Girl)

Shortcake introduction (poly fic)

One Last Time

Divorced!Frankie helping you (One last time-verse)

No Elves Were Harmed in the Making of this Meet-Cute

Grinding on Frankie 

Ezra 

The Devil Beckons (And I Must Heed His Call)

Incubus!Ezra HC

Aristocats Ezra HC Ezra hiding his desires for Duchess

Aristocats Ezra HC Ezra scolding himself for desiring Duchess

Aristocats Ezra HC “I’m nothing more than a mutt”

Stupid Man

Detective au hc

Oberyn Martell 

The Viper The Princess The Lover & The Sentry (poly fic) (UNDER CONSTRUCTION)

Airbender Meditating HC (poly fic)

Princess Domentzia and Knight!Reader adjusting to Dornish climate

A Lady's Brood

Cyvasse

Condolences 

Oberyn & Food

Jack “Whiskey” Daniels 

Austin Powers AU

Dave York

Carol York x Reader “Girl’s Night”

Maxwell Lord

(everything i currently have written for maxwell lord is all within the universe of my main fic here)

Rip Out Our Seams & Stitch Us Together

Your Background and Childhood HC

Max and Valerie don’t know how to tell you they love you because theyre stupid rich people HC

You knowing you're a fucking snacc HC

The Lords and Breeding kink

Fancy Robes HC

Taking Alastair out for a family day 

Maxwell and Cujo

Max Philips 

(i completly forgot i wrote this lmao)

Hell is a Nine to Five

Max Philips x Werewolf!Reader hc

Pedro Boys HC

Pierced Nipples HC

Pedro characters as horror villains

Pedro characters as werewolves

Pedro characters with a demon!reader

Spencer Reid

An Ode To Black Lipstick

Neat Shoes

Eddie Munson

No Dice Needed

Eddie dating a derby girl

eddie expressing love hc 

His first i love you

[papayajuan2019]

the "in another universe" "in another life" posts are funny cause you only get one, this one, and you've already resigned to losing it too. try fighting in this one

[goyangi-deactivated20251013]

the goal for this year and for every year is to be kind and also to stop being scared of literally everything

[kylieminvogue]

"WHEN HARRY MET SALLY..." 1989, dir. Rob Reiner

[homosexualslug]

beautiful conversations happening on twitter

[sygol]

Hi I'm 1 years old and learning to read through your posts. Cigarette.

very good job using your words! will someone get this toddling bitch a smoke

[ryebreadgf]

why do so many songs just not have bridges anymore. why is your song 2 minutes long

[bastam]

Little bit funny how people's dislike of Harry Potter has now lapsed into like complete and total dismissal. The other day I was at a flower show and the theme for the displays at this particular flower show were book themed. And of course an admiring crowd went round and did the circuit of displays, ooh-ing and aah-ing at various renditions of The Railway Children and Little Red Riding Hood and taking photos. All extremely cool. And then they got to the Harry Potter section and there was just a complete blank look on a lot of people's faces. They didn't even comment like with the other displays, they simply walked by giving each other what-the-fuck-is-this shrugs. My sister is getting offered the opportunity to go to Harry Potter World by her college for art purposes this year and she said people were so distinctly unpsyched by even the offer of a very cheap coach trip and abysmally low priced tickets that they were already counting themselves out of the trip months in advance. There are stores with discount Gryffindor lunchboxes and scarves piling up desperately by the masses. Little stickers on them denoting price drops. Some stickers on top of others. Nobody gives a fuck about Harry Potter. It's all terribly exciting. I hope the HBO show is the nail in the coffin and we can finally put this shambolic corpse to a stake through the chest rest

[pettyprocrastination]

God I miss challengers

[omar-little]

good morning and happy tuesday I’m so excited for another day of posting on company time with y’all

[seffersonjtarship-deactivated20]

reblog to put a weighted blanket on the person u reblog this from

[mad-rieux]

[electronicmail]

Hey how's the ovulation going

im a danger to myself and others

[pettyprocrastination]

Anybody have reccomendations for trying to find a full time job while the market is in shambles and companies are ghosting applicants left and right

[grandpayaoi]

new rule you have to live to be 34. you cant kill yourself until you turn 34. jesus died at 33 you can do better

[grandpayaoi]

this is a common law btw. you can check it out by looking up 'rule 34'

[fifty-fired-fay]

Dear God there's pussy here

[transhuman-priestess]

That’s the other reason you can’t kill yourself

[pettyprocrastination]

Sometimes I think about succession and I suddenly get hit in the face with how insane that entire family was. What do you mean you locked your brother in a cage and made him eat out of a dog bowl to the point where he started wetting the bed and got sent to boarding school.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

that post that's like. "americans sincerely trying to argue that they're UNIQUELY incapable of learning things about other countries and cultures is still a form of american exceptionalism." I think about that a lot.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

like rather than just own that they're ignorant they'll really act like ICE will grab you off the street if you google a world map or read a translated book and there's no possible way to learn anything that's not on fox news. fucking clown shit.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

idk man something about my countrymen insisting we have no choice but to be ignorant and no way to learn when we live in one of the most resource rich, coddled countries in the fucking world just makes me insane.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

and like. the whole reason we're so comfortable is, largely, because of the rampant exploitation of, you guessed it, the people and resources of those other countries that you can't even be bothered to learn the names of! incredible work everybody!!!

[digital-magus]

You’re not wrong, but you can’t deny the contributions of the massive propaganda machine designed with the express purpose of KEEPING us distracted and disinterested so that said exploitation can continue unimpeded.

Yes, we are still the ones making the choice, and must take responsibility for the repercussions, but let’s not pretend there isn’t a massive finger on the scale.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

the United States, famously the only country to utilize propaganda,

[digital-magus]

I never said we were, but the modern American propaganda machine is one of (if not the) most powerful and insidious the world has ever seen.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

okay so you're doing american exceptionalism on the "stop doing american exceptionalism" post

[dykerory]

i think it can be uncomfortable to admit for USamericans to admit to ourselves that the reason we stopped learning after school is largely due to our own inertia. I don't think it makes anyone a bad person, but I think the very first step in trying to rectify the situation is properly identifying what the problem actually is.

[fadedlovemp3]