It wasn’t “Wedding of the Year” and it’s not the typical wedding you see on movies and such but everything about our wedding seemed perfect. You may have heard this from almost all people who had just gotten married that, indeed, their weddings are perfect and one can’t really judge what perfection is.
However, I loved the intimacy of our ceremony. It was just me, my wife, and my sister. Calling her my wife, by the way, is giving me that romantic excitement and those butterflies in my stomach.
September 20, 2019. Pre-wedding Meeting.
It was a rainy afternoon. We were collected by the hotel chauffeur from the airport and we immediately went to the hotel-apartment. We sent a message to Andred, the marriage minister, informing them that we were already in South Africa.
We met them shortly after arriving at the hotel-apartment and wanted to offer them something to drink but we literally did not have anything to offer at the moment. We didn’t know where the store was and we’ve literally just thrown our baggage inside the rooms so the living room did not look crowded. Andred and Alison are the proxy wedding coordinators because Kirsty, our main contact person from Weddings Out of Africa, was away for business.
During the meeting, Andred and Alison explained to us how the ceremony was going to happen. They said that the driver will pick us up and we’ll meet at the venue, Bakoven Rocks. Andred had a few questions about our preferences for the ceremony as he didn’t want to make it like a Civil Wedding where it is rushed and is lacking that romantic touch - which, by the way, was what we expected.
Then he asked us if we wanted the ceremony to be more religious or spiritual. Us both being omnists, we preferred something spiritual and factual. We told him that we didn’t want to offend anyone if we push through with religious verses and anecdotes on the wedding and neither of us are religious as well. With this, Andred smiled and asked a few more questions about our relationship, how it started and how long we’ve been together.
He and Alison were a joy to speak with. By the end of the conversation, we found ourselves adoring them!
We had a pre-wedding shoot at Signal Hill and met, for the first time, Jilda, our photographer. Being both Filipino women who are working in the Middle East, we aren’t used at all to be intimate on photos. We don’t kiss and barely hold hands in public. So you can imagine the discomfort we felt while we were there wearing dresses and all glammed up and was told to kiss for the camera. The first 15 mintues was excruciatingly awkward. We were so conscious of the people around us who were looking at us too. Then Jilda told us not to worry because we will not be discriminated there. She said that every second or third couple you meet in Capetown was a same-sex couple. Then some lurkers who passed by were smiling and saying “Congratulations” to us. That was when we started to calm down. People were looking but there was no judgment. It was as if they were just looking at a normal couple who were having a photoshoot. Then on the other side of the mountain, we saw another hetero-couple who were doing the same thing and they both also congratulated us like it’s the most natural thing
To be honest, that was the first time we felt free in our own skin. It was the first time we were acknowledged by strangers to be girlfriends and not as girl “friends”. It was a freeing moment for us both.
10AM-3PM, we went for hair and make-up and by 4PM our driver, Brian, was already waiting for us outside our hotel-apartment. We were already dressed in our wedding outfits and Honey, my wife, was looking gorgeous as ever!
Brian welcomed us and told us that we looked stunning, “Thanks, Brian.” LOL. We got in, tried our best to feel comfortable and were actually NOT nervous at all. On the contrary, we were super excited. We drove about 10 minutes to the location and upon arrival, the photographers and wedding coordinators were already there.
We stepped down from the car and Brian told us that he’ll just be on standby there so we can leave our things. We thanked them and the photographer greeted us while Andred and Alison hugged us. We walked a few minutes towards the big pile of boulders which made both of us laugh because we were wearing high heels. Alison held my hand for support and my sister was helping Honey.
As we were situated by a flat boulder, we were asked to position in front of the minister, Andred. The weather was surprisingly great despite the rainy days beforehand.
No words can describe our wedding. It wasn’t the usual type; there was no entourage, it wasn’t in a church. Excluding the photographers and the wedding organizers, the only guest was our sister. The outfits weren’t blinding white nor lacy (as a matter of fact, we got it off the racks), the champagne non-alcoholic (LOL) and to top it all off… there were two brides.
Andred started reading his script and we were simply blown away with how simple it is yet very sincere. The ceremony wasn’t grand nor was it lavished with romantic anecdotes, but it was sincere.
Having spent night and day with each other for the years we’ve been together, one can definitely say that we’ve been through a lot.
We literally came out to our families at the same time, became OFWs together and learned the ropes in life in the same manner.
I was still a kid in the head when we met and we grew up and matured together. There were times that we learned, laughed and there were even times when we both were miserable and downright low… but we held on knowing that even as the world around us crashed into us - we had each other and its all that matters.
So the vows were said from the heart… they were words that had been etched in each of our souls. We both cried. Not with any specific emotion but with a lot of emotions being felt at once.
After all the years that had passed, we have finally turned into reality a long-aspired reverie that used to seem impossible.
We put the ring on each other’s finger and kissed for the first time - as wife and wife. Mrs. and Mrs. Rabanes.
The wedding itself wasn’t what most would say is their dream wedding, but it was ours. Every bit of the ceremony for us was perfection! The waves crashing into the boulders were our music, our melody. The cool wind brushing to our skin demanded for our embrace and the sun brought out glitter and joy from our eyes.
The venue was secluded and very romantic. It was a dream come true where “I do” was professed in a whisper of authenticity rather than a loud declaration of ownership. It’s everything we dreamed of and more… It’s the beginning of another sequel to the story of our lives.
(For post with photos, see photos here) @pinoylesbiancouples