Plaalt @plaalt - Tumblr Blog

#touhou

thatoneunknowncognitohazard

*to the tune of Welcome to the Jungle by Guns 'n' Roses*

Fuck this stupid seagull

It broke into my house

Stole my fucking sandwich

Right out my fucking mouth

Fuck this goddamn seagull

You now have beef with me

I'll make your world a living hell

I'll make you fucking bleed

This isn't based on personal experience or anything I just hate seagulls regardless.

plaalt

Investing at one note

azulcrescent

Context : around a year or 2 ago, my lil sister told my mom that i take 4 times longer to show now compared to before. Found it hilarious so i decided to draw this comic lol also me and my 2 sisters both like dyeing our hair so we all end up looking like different flavors of pudding haha

glowcowboy

does anyone wanna hold hands until we feel a little braver

its-your-mind

the reblog map is all of us holding hands btw

beautifulterriblequeen

We are each other's night sky. No one is alone here.

dear-ao3

night sky continues to get brighter. theres always people here for you

azulcrescent

Doc, why can't I find love?

Was watching a PM Seymour video from a year ago and you were in it. Congrats, I guess? I don't really know what the etiquette is for that pls help me

Look he has found me worthy of his funny voices and i am graced with freaking people out on being in a famous persons videos

It feeds me soul

leatherwingsinc-deactivated2015

caluummhood-deactivated20140506

HOLY SHIT, IT WAS THE ORIGINAL ONE

MAKE A WISH

heritageposts

date of origin: 2013

maryland-officially

NO NO NOOOO

shencomix

pukicho

do you think you have more men or women followers?

Only women follow me, because they can sense my gentle, deer-like aura

silli-billy15

Nuh uh I’m a guy and I follow you

You're a guy

For now

I forgor to charge it

plaalt

how did i do the same thing as azul wtf

writing-prompt-s

You never knew your birth parents, growing up across the country in orphanages. While alone you learned to cook and shared your meals across the world, eventually owning your own business. One day you suddenly find out what your parents were. They were Fae… you’ve fed thousands Fae Food.

caffeinewitchcraft

The call from your New York restaurant comes at 2am their time which is a sensible 11pm your time.

“Boss, we need you,” the manager says. Hercules – the name he chose for himself when he first started working for you – doesn’t scare easily. He can’t, not while running three of your restaurants in the cesspool that is New York city. “Someone just drove a truck through the flagship.”

You’re already out of bed and out the door. “I’ll be there before the sun comes up.”

Hercules’ relief bleeds through the phone. “Thank you.”

“You’re my right arm, Hercules,” you say. You’re wearing the plaid pajama set Mercedes, your left arm and the woman who runs your LA restaurants, gave you for your birthday. You can buy clothes in New York. “Thank you.”

Your Thank yous are far and few between. They’ve always felt awkward in your mouth and worse leaving it. But Hercules is one of yours and it’s easy to volley the words back, to not accept his gratitude in the face of his loyalty. No thanks needed. You’re part of me.

Hercules swallows hard. He knows you well. “Boss.”

“Hercules.”

You hang up at the same time.

Los Angeles is still awake as you roar onto the streets. Your motorcycle is the same one you bought when your first restaurant started turning a profit. Prodigal. The name of it is carved into the body. The streets are damp from a rare spot of rain. You’d gotten caught in it while leaving Queen earlier. It had felt like a bad omen then and your lip curls as the moisture sprays up under your tires now.

You should always listen to your gut.

motherfucker-somewhat-limited

lonesomenecromancer

more isat drawings yay

talisidekick

A while back my pharmacist saw my deadname on my profile and accidentially called it out, he corrected and deleted my deadname from the system so only my preferred name shows up now. There was a crowd of people behind me, so as he hands over the pills he apologized, in equal tone and volume as when he called my deadname and lied saying it's been a long day and he didn't mean to call out -his own- name. I quietly told him it was fine and he didn't need to do that for my sake.

His response: "No, it's my name now."

I went to the pharmacist yesterday, his nametag is my deadname. He informed me he's immigrating and in the process he's changed his first name to my deadname to have an English sounding name. That's why he's now able to get a reprint of his nametag to be my deadname. And repeated, with the intense seriousness of someone who is going to die on this hill: "It's mine now. Not yours. I'm taking." His tone indicated that decision is final.

Bro literally deadnamed me once, and has committed to flat out stealing my deadname. It's his now. Legally. Officially. I over heard his co-workers call him by the name.

vhalesa

Perspective exercise but with snoms

icecream-noodle

Please free them OP 😨

rockandtoon

@i-am-a-snom

i-am-a-snom

[cc • )___\] Eh, it's not too bad in here.

[cc •)___\] For now at least.

uss-edsall

When you’re an archaeologist with a set schedule, sometimes people really get to understand who you are

When I dug in France I always got a croissant at 0520 from the same exact place in Échemines. A week in, they had one lying on the counter for me by the time I walked in. By the second week I got the exact amount I’d pay in hand when I walked in, because they’d reliably have it ready. I made sure to tell the owners that I wasn’t returning on my last day of the dig.

uss-edsall

I may mention that every time I ordered in French. On my last day the owners gave me hugs and kindly told me to never speak in French again