i'm gonna carpe this diem so hard @primordialmushroomsoup - Tumblr Blog

this video has been the last hinge holding me together for weeks now. I need to watch it once a day or I'll start disintegrating

fluentisonus

they're trying to get me to do something called ""my job"" instead of reading about medieval english poaching laws

drtrinitysantos

I need to smoke weed with this bitch

yepperoni

waitafrikk

i hate when a book describes a pause as pregnant. get your dick out of the pause

lunyselene

terry pratchett is the only person who actually knew how to use a pregnant pause

hymneminium

Not that there's anything wrong with having something wrong with you

probablyautistic-definitleygay

omegaversereloaded

ilove when someone posts about an issue that's supposedly plaguing society and it's painfully obvious that said issue is not a thing that matters if youre not on tiktok

nianeyna

reminds me of this reddit comment I have saved

kacey-luv

exeggcute

one of my favorite this american life segments of late is about the people who played orchestra pit for phantom of the opera on broadway and how, like, a sizeable majority of them had literally been playing the show since it opened in 1988 (on broadway. I know it opened in 86 on the west end, you random pedants, but I am specifically talking about broadway musicians) because their contracts stipulated that they'd have jobs throughout the show's entire run... but nobody anticipated that phantom would become the longest-running broadway show of all time.

and none of these people wanted to walk away from a guaranteed job, so very few of them ever quit. they just kept doing the same show eight nights a week... for twenty or thirty years... and by the time it finally closed last year most of these musicians (who had been working together for DECADES) hated each other and really really fucking loathed phantom. I can't stop thinking about it. it's indescribably hellish to imagine but also the funniest thing I've ever heard in my life.

exeggcute

can you imagine.

bisexualshakespeare

[ID: excerpt from an article reading: One of my favorite stories, which should drive anyone who has every played in a band crazy-- there’s this bassoon player who has sat next to the same clarinet player since 1988. She’s convinced he plays half a note4 flat on every note he’s every played. He denies this. /]

cleverlittlefox

gloriousmonsters

when you're feeling full hater mode about a piece of media but you know one of your beloved mutuals enjoys it

milf--adjacent

Let the historical record show that Mr. Beast was entirely ignorable if you were just like doing literally anything else. I've been on youtube as long as it's been around and I've never been recommended a video by him. I see him in passing as a meme. I thought he was a made up joke, a caricature of bad youtuber content miners until someone I trust confirmed his existence to me in late 2025.

sporeblossom

“the millenium falcon would wipe out the enterprise in seconds” lmao the enterprise is just an innocent science class floating thru space…. all they wanna do is look at some rocks… kiss an alien…. find some space plants….. why would you fight that its not a battleship theyre just nerds…… leave them olone

berniesanderssaggyleftnut-deact

lystheni

A friend of mine saw this and brought up some interesting arguments

so, in other words,

professor-maple-mod

Pretty much.

jaegerdelta

here have some size comparison

two-punch-man

Who wins in a fight, a fully staffed Navy research vessel or your local weed man and his best friend in their souped up VW Bus?

regionalpancake

tags via @procrastinatorproject

So while it’s true that the Enterprise is not as big as people think, that goes double for the Falcon!

A good way of thinking about the relative size is by using a bridge comparison:

The Enterprise bridge has space for 11 people to work, as well as a significant amount of space between stations to move around comfortably:

[Bridge illustration by Tobias Weinmann via here]

And the whole thing fits in the nipple thing up on top of the saucer:

Meanwhile the Falcon (beloved weed bus) has a cockpit that seats 4, with only 2 main operational stations, and zero floor space:

And since Serenity was mentioned too…

Serenity has a bridge more comparable to La Sirena - with 2 stations at the front and quite a bit of floor space.

And for those interested in a visual comparison:

(Boeing 747 for scale as well as the Delta Flyer because Why Not)

TLDR: The Millennium Falcon is pretty dinky, so I propose *true weed bus status* goes to the excellent smuggling ships of Serenity and La Sirena. The Falcon is herby demoted to man on his weed bicycle with his pet monkey and a gun (to be clear the monkey is Solo)

enigma-the-mysterious

This is the analysis I am here for

disease-danger-darkness-silence

I was gonna say it’s more like a weed guy and his 1986 Honda Civic hatchback.

voroxpete

This is something that actually gets brought up in the Star Trek canon, since it’s standard Federation policy to state that they do not make warships. They make diplomatic and science vessels, and then they arm those science vessels purely for self defence, because it’s a dangerous universe out there. The Federation, as a matter of policy, does not have a navy, they have an exploration fleet. Starfleet is - they will take great pains to stress - a purely scientific and diplomatic organisation.

To which every other civillisation immediately calls bullshit, because “Yo, what the fuck bro, your ‘lightly armed science vessel’ can go to toe-to-toe with our top of the line warships!”

And the Federation’s response to this accusation can more or less be summed up as “You’re absolutely right, our lightly armed science vessels can go toe-to-toe to with your best warships… Which means you probably don’t want to find out what happens if we actually start building warships.”

beatnikdaddio

john berkey. star wars concept artwork. 1976.

charlesoberonn

If Sherlock Holmes was Isekai'd to a fantasy world he would just deduce the rules of this world and get back to solving crimes. He'll find an elf girl sidekick,name her Watson, and pretend like nothing happened.

ironmyrmidon

"If you look closely, you can see traces of chalk dust on the floor. Our murderer must have used a magic circle to kill our victim."

"Actually Holmes, this looks like salt. Quite unusual for a magic circle, since it can be scattered so easily..."

"It tastes like salt too. Good eye Watson. Let us start by visiting the fish mongers."

"Well I would enjoy some fried dragonfish, but how does this help our investigation?"

charlesoberonn

"A process of elimination, my long-eared friend. There're only two ways for the culprit to get salt in the city. They could have brought it in themselves-"

"But then they'd have to pay the tarrif!"

"Very astute! No, a much likelier option is that they bought it here. Either the docks or the meat market would be the place. And I have a hunch that our culprit is fishy in more ways than one."

charlesoberonn

"But Holmes, how did you know the merfolk ambassador was the killer?"

"An excellent question, the key was the footprints."

"But he doesn't even have feet!"

"He doesn't as of right now. But you forget, the magic circle."

"I see! The killing spell was a water spear, which normally requires a circle."

"But doesn't if you're already imbued with water magic like our scaly ambassador."

"So the circle..."

"To grant him a pair of feet. For just long enough to leave distinctive footprints in the scattered salt and to make us suspect a two-legged killer."

"By the Goddess, Holmes, you're a genius!"