RMH
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$LAYYYTER
blake kathryn
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Game Changer & Make Some Noise
todays bird
Cosmic Funnies
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
tannertan36
occasionally subtle
roma★
hello vonnie
TMBGareOK. The Official They Might Be Giants tumblr
Keni
The Stonewall Inn
izzy's playlists!
noise dept.
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taylor price
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Norway
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Indonesia
seen from Russia
seen from Japan
seen from Brazil
seen from Australia
seen from United States
seen from Germany
seen from Germany
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@qt3-14-not-a-bot
if light just said he was gay and swapped out the porno mags for GAY porno mags he would have gotten away with everything, i believe that with my entire being
“why does he have so much to hide” gay, next question. “why does he act so strange around L sometimes” gay, next question. “why is he so perfect and meticulous” gay, next question.
My favorite dynamic in both platonic and romantic ships are “we share the braincell” or “they are both very smart until you put them together and then they’re dumbasses.”
"My braincell is allergic to yours" is peak dynamic.
Will Graham's batshit leaps in deduction are so much more valid and interesting than BBC Sherlock's so called reasoning. Sherlock would go on some pouty big brain tirade about how the killer is clearly the cousin based off the imprint of the dust layer and the way he turns on lamps meaning he has a meth habit and a need to kill or smth whilst our boy Will Graham just stares off into space, starts vibrating and perspiring like a wet excitable dog and then simply announces terrifying shit like "had to cut you open to get a decent sound out of you... anyway the killer is a violin stringer"
imagine hiring an assassin and they talk to you in a customer service voice
"Hello, how can I help you today? Wonderful, can I get a first and last name? And how would I spell that? Awesome. And would you happen to have an address for this individual? And place of work? Fantastic.
Now, I'm going to give you a number, and I'm going to ask that you send in a photo of your target alongside any additional information you may have- family members, security, combat training, medical conditions, just anything you can think of that might be helpful.
Wonderful, you are all good. All we need now is a piece of government-issued ID, for insurance purposes, and a location for payment pickup. We accept cash, gold, processed uranium, and etransfer.
I'm sorry, we don't take american express.
Good, okay, so it looks like we are all set- when the job is complete, you will be notified VIA discreet codeword that a stranger will whisper to you on a crowded street.
We do not issue receipts, but if you'd like, I can arrange for a specific breed of tropical flower to be sent to your home address. Our associates will be able to validate it should the need arises.
And is that everything you were looking for today? Great! Thank you for coming to us. Have a nice day!"
Alternatively,
"I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid the Pope is a high-status target that is beyond our area of service.
Yes, I- no, I'm sorry, I'm not able to do that for you.
Okay. Okay. Yes, I understand.
Sir, if you're going to use that sort of language, you should know that our HR department does operate in a hands-on capacity.
Wonderful. You take care."
They create a perfectly normal call cemter staffed by decidedly amoral college students and paying them at least 4x minimum wage.
hiring manager: you’re not concerned about the ah, services we offer?
a college student who has eaten ramen twice a day for the past year: for $25/hour i’ll pull the trigger myself
I still think about when Owl City sang "and I'll kiss you between the ears". What the fuck does that mean. I can't get over it
i wondered this for like a year before I realized the line immediately preceding it was "we'll take a long walk through the cornfield" and it clicked and I haven't been the same since
His puns are simply of a calibur too high for the commonfolk to comprehend
if you have a crush on the same person as someone else just unionize
enemies to lovers romance between me and myself
The guy behind the counter at the post office was just like, "can I getcha anything else? Stamps? Pint of blood?" And the ten seconds it took me to remember my mask has vampire teeth printed on it was the longest most bewildering moment of my year so far
"how did you hear about this job?" it came to me in an extremely vivid and unsettling prophetic dream
"congratulations! you're hired" i know.
sky high but it’s about being gay
I’ve seen Horny Internet Fangirls fall physically in lust with everything from standard hunks to weird cartoons to robots to monsters and every body type from potbelly bear to skeletal beanpole and it never fails to amaze me, when by comparison, straight guys seem to have trouble with any woman who isn’t hourglass shaped
at first I thought this post was going to bash horny internet fangirls, but it turned out great.
in the words of the great Elizabethan wordsmith William Shakespeare, in Hamlet Act IV Scene V, “When sorrows come, they come not single spies, but in battalions.” or, in the words of the great Twitter wordsmith @Horse_ebooks,
this is 1947 Cincinnati Enquirer erasure
please do not forget your smash mouth
not to talk about doctor who but remember being a lonely depressed teenager and hearing him say '900 years of time and space and i've never met anyone who wasn't important'
he was like ‘just this once-everybody lives’ and i chased that shit with homosexual determination for every day since, like maybe through pure force of will i could save everyone i loved from a system that wanted us dead
you know how the greeks wrote about love between two men being the highest form of love, but like, it wasn’t a #winforthegays, it was just because they hated women sooo much? supernatural vibes.
It really took a global quarantine to make my autistic ass miss human contact huh
No wait I think I'm over it
bitches will bring a million things to do on a train ride or long car trip and then spend the entire time looking out the window and daydreaming. i’m bitches
bitches will plan a million things to do during self-isolation and then spend the entire time mindlessly scrolling through social media. i’m bitches
