Its called surviving @queenofthecrossroadss - Tumblr Blog

You may have a toxic dysfunctional family if....

You force yourself to disassociate at the table during Sunday family dinner because your parents are yelling at and berating your other siblings for no reason AND THEN, they make you all (yes including yourself even though you don’t even live there 🙃) sit at the table for another half hour talking about every little thing you all need to change about cleaning habits but just talk in circles the entire time and get mad when someone try’s to make a point or counter argument or really just say anything 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃

But atleast there’s cherry cobbler 🙄

Edit: I stole away for 20 minutes to have a cig and the “conversation” is still happening

mockwa

earthdad

this is what a king looks like

midiport

what-username-where

When he starts SCREAMING the gummy bear song in German I dIED

gallusrostromegalus

So while I was getting my haircut, the lady asked me if I had other plans for the day and I said:

“I’m just going to pick up the boy from daycare and then it’s date night.”

And the lady says “Oh! How old is he?”

“He’s three.”

“Mine too! Where are you registering him for kindergarten it’s such a hassle-”

And that’s when I realized I said “boy” and not “dog” because I always think of Charlie as “good boy” but this slip up has lead to a miscommunication.

The lady is now 6 minutes into a clearly needed rant about how unnecessarily complex shopping for schools is, esp when you have a neurodivergent child, so I can’t just tell her that Charlie is a dog because then she’ll feel awkward for unloading on me and she clearly has enough going on.

So the rest of the haircut became a game of “how much can I say about Charlie without revealing that he is not a human child?” And the answer is “enough to cover a half hour hair appointment, quite possibly several hours worth if I’m specific enough”

gallusrostromegalus

“is he very verbal?”

“It really depends on who he’s with. He’s very quiet at he but won’t shut up if he’s at the park or has a friend over.”

“was it hard to potty-train him?”

“he’s adopted, but I was genuinely amazed at how good he already was with hygene and potty stuff.”

“mine’s just obsessed with paw patrol and Frozen, drives me crazy!”

“I imagine. Charlie is colorblind so he’s not as into tv, but he always wants a toy if I take him anywhere with them.”

“oh gosh the toys! And the kids are so rough on them!”

“yeah Charlie can destroy a stuffed animal in about 2 minutes, so I only buy him the really cheap ones.”

“Does he throw tantrums when they break?”

“Not really. It’s meditative, really, taking them apart. He has hysterics if the cat takes his toys though. Runs downstairs and cries at me until I retrieve it because he’s not tall enough to get it out of the cat tree.”

gallusrostromegalus

The Very Good Boy in question, Charleston Chew.

(if you want to read more of my much weirder adventures, I have pre-orders for my book on Patreon right now: https://www.patreon.com/gallusrostromegalus )

krwzprtt

lostsinthelights

I’m not your homeland anymore… so what am I defending now? (x)

What the fuck?

I was really curious about like. how? exactly this happened and it turns out that someone just had a cooler of crabs that ended up getting opened on accident.

suigintou

wait is 5! = 120 an actual math thing i just reblogged it bc i sincerely believe that yelling a number makes it bigger

bunyipandler

An exclamation point after a number means factorial. Five factorial is 5 times 4 times 3 times 2 times 1. Three factorial is 3 times 2 times 1, etc.

maeamian

But the more exclamation points after a number, the less big it is, a double factorial is every other number, so 6!! is 6 times 4 times 2, which is less than 6!, So yelling a number makes it bigger, but yelling louder makes it smaller again

dragongirltitties

it’s because you scared it

foreveralone-lyguy

I sent my dog outside for standing on the dining room table. This was his response.

mamalazzer

twitchytyrant

I can’t believe he killed Harrison Ford twice

babyanimalgifs

nilim

Ok, so I was reading this news story:

So far so normal, right? But then:

Like what. And then:

Like, I think Alaska State Trooper Ken Marsh wants to be a romance novelist.

panicblanket

well would you look at that

catchymemes

nirtonic

Malignant compliance is an effective tool to keep in obese quiver

unbossed-deactivated20251218

It’s more commonly known as “work-to-rule” and here’s a great story about one case of its successful use.

https://libcom.org/blog/work-rule-11052014

“The day after Starbucks workers met at the Bat Cave we found ourselves working an understaffed morning shift but this time it was different. Instead of feeling the normal frustration, those of us who were at the meeting exchanged knowing glances and began implementing our plan of following every rule, thereby slowing down service. We also whispered to partners who were not in the know to slow down, don’t kill yourself. It was as if everyone took a deep breath and began working at a safe and thorough pace. The effects were instant. The speed of service dropped immediately. We ran out of brewed coffee because we were only brewing when the beeper signaled it was time. Everyone stayed in the positions they were assigned and acted only at the directions of the Store Manager. Every 10 minutes when someone was assigned to clean the lobby, we did a thorough job, ensuring everything was clean and properly stocked. Every drink and food order was perfect.

Dan, the Store Manager, lost his mind.”