Quietnight

fandom version of those little bugs who crawl around collecting bits of cool junk and sticking it to themselves with spit

[90s-kid-sad-adult]

lie to me

[itsalwaysdark]

you have to be careful reading too many things that are good/smart/well-written bc then you encounter something that isnt and you get confused like ? why didnt they just make this good ? were they stupid

[hyperrbolic-orange]

babygirl I don't know how to tell you this but there just isn't a way to do mass dehumanization in like, a "progressive leftist" kinda way.

[onlywatchin]

you walk into the raven cycle like what the fuck kinda name is "gansey" and you walk out of th raven cycle like these characters are my close personal friends

[a-daks]

canon: they died

fanfic: fUCK YOU

[andordean]

Canon: and so they never met

Fanfic: here’s a funny story

[namesonboats]

Canon: There was tension and pining, but they never even kissed.

Fanfic: Actually,

[kaeltale]

Canon: Torture the cinnamon roll.

Fanfic: Torture the cinnamon roll.

[conversationswithjohnlock]

Canon: When they traveled they stayed in separate rooms

Fanfic: AND. THERE. WAS. ONLY. ONE. BED!!!!!

[caressthosecheekbones]

Canon: … and they were roommates.

Fanfic: oh my god, they were roommates…

[johanirae]

Canon: They were international assassins who assassinated assassins.

Fanfic: But hot DAMN wait till you hear about this cafe they opened

[jenroses]

Canon: They had a coffeeshop

Fanfic: but they were ASSASSINS

[pizzapopolis]

Canon: they were mortal enemies and attempted to murder each other on multiple occasions

Fanfic: bUT THEY GOT MARRIED AND ADOPTED CHILDREN

[robbyrobinabitch]

Everytime I reblog this has a new addition and it’s the best

[inkpotter-deactivated20211125]

Canon: They were straight

Fanfic: Lol

[boxofsoap]

THE LAST ONE IS THE BEST ONE

[meggiebrick]

I love fanfic so so so much.

[sweetteaa19]

Canon: Am I joke to you?

[ursulaismymiddlename]

Fanon: No, just a disappointment.

[worldheritagepostorganization]

World Heritage Post

[0-cross]

cannon: here’s the unhappy ending to the story.

Fannan: and then they lived happily ever after

[currentlycryingaboutlancelot]

even with watching a movie from like the 90s it’s insane how much everyone looks like a Normal Person compared to anything filmed today

[currentlycryingaboutlancelot]

it’s something about the aggressively obvious 2020s makeup too on everyone in every movie no matter what the time period is. it’s the 19th century they do not have highlight!!!!

[currentlycryingaboutlancelot]

look at meg march in 1994 vs 2019. they both look great! however! emma watson is wearing very obvious lipstick, mascara, concealer under eyes heavy foundation etc etc. you can see this at a glance. i literally in making this comparison had to google if this was a promotional image that she took or actually a still from the movie because her makeup just looks like normal 2019 makeup that a girl from 2019 would wear!!! (not to mention her costume. different post.) then look at trini alvarado on the other left. obviously she’s wearing tons of makeup because she’s in a movie and she has tons of lights on her all the time but it doesn’t look she is!! you can see circles under her eyes!! she doesn’t have The Shine to her face that emma watson does. she looks so much more believable as a girl from the 1860s not because she’s a perfect representation but simply because she does not Obviously Have On Modern Makeup

[sreegs]

hey it's me black mold. thanks for running your window air conditioner all summer. whatever you do, do not regularly clean the removable filter. that's not necessary

you should also never ever unplug the air conditioner and stick a flashlight in the vent that blows air to see if we're in there. it's very bad, that place should not be checked

and whatever you do, if you've already made the mistake of unplugging it, don't remove it from the window for cleaning if possible. and whether it's possible to remove the unit or not, don't carefully disassemble the front panel, document where the screws go and plastic bits go, and open up the vent more to be able to get into it easily

as black mold, i'm an expert on this. you should heed my warnings: now, if you've somehow made the mistake of doing all of the above, you should not use warm water and dish soap to CLEAN the inside of the vent thoroughly. DON'T ever use a bottle brush to get into the hard to reach places. and certainly don't rinse and dry the cleaned area before carefully putting it back together

there's nothing wrong with us, black mold. we don't cause or exacerbate breathing conditions like asthma or other illnesses. it's cool, we're cool

furthermore, if you're capable of removing the window unit, DONT take a hose with the same soapy water and wash the portion of the window unit that sits outside the window and is therefore weatherproofed.

whatever you do, don't allow the air conditioner to dry before plugging it back in and turning it on again

and if you have a central air conditioner, you will definitely never ever consult a manual or sources online to perform a similar cleaning procedure on the cooling unit outside.

lastly, if you're physically unable to do the things we (the black mold) warned you not to do above, you should never ever ask someone to help you or hire a service to do it.

[garbage-empress]

Also even if you do not have the time, space or ability to do some of the the things in the OP, definitely do not clean the coils (the awful sharp flat stacks of metal) with foaming coil cleaner. That removes the beneficial black mold (us) holding the unit together. It will be completely unsatisfying to watch the foam clean out the Super Beneficial Black Mold, Mildew, Hair, Lint & Dust Combo™ (that is not only a health hazard but making the unit less efficient at cooling necessary for air conditioner function) and leave the metal shiny.

It is a lot of elbow grease and definitely not just spraying a can and waiting. Especially do not use the ones that are self rinsing via the natural condensation of water around the coils where all you have to do is let the foam settle a couple hours before turning the unit back on. These foaming cleaners are also terrible to use on the removable air intake vent covers. You definitely do not just have to spray the opposite side of all the trapped shit on the plastic mesh and let the foam push it off. Also that stuff on the cover is great for you and your air conditioner.

Trust us. We, the mold, know much more about air conditioners than the people who make aerosol cans you can pick up for like $8 at home depot. Definitely do not do this a couple times a season.

[anistarrose]

my only religious belief is that there is no afterlife except for the ublock origin team who are going to heaven and the youtube anti-adblock team who are going to hell

[elldritch-horror]

I find it very telling that Tamsyn Muir, who came up through this hellsite, wrote books where the evil emperor starts out as a basically okay leftist millennial tumblr user.

What makes the villain the villain (inasmuch as it's useful to examine TLT characters through that kind of simplistic lens) is that when the chips are down and he has to choose, his priority is punishing the wicked, not saving the people left behind.

I would invite anyone whose engagement with their cause consists of finding the 'correct' group of people to hate, to consider whether 'evil emperor' is the next career move you see yourself taking, and if it isn't, to gently suggest disembarking from the hate train.

Because no one wants their God King to be a tumblrina called John.

[jusjuiceboxbox]

Welcome to being an adult! Featuring such injury causing events as

- sneezed wrong

- turned your neck a little too fast

- slept weird

- took the trash out to the curb and stepped at a slightly different angle than usual

- breathed

- failed to breathe properly

- breathed in the wrong stuff. Allergy time

- looked too hard at something too far away

- knees

[antlered-vixen]

I am so tired of short-attention-span, trim-the-fat culture. All writing advice these days is for how to write like Chuck Palahniuk. "Cut 'think', cut 'feel', cut 'wonder' - only action, only pushing forward, show and move and move and move." What if I could emulate this style, and still don't want to? What if I want to write like Henry James, with three paragraphs of introspective musings between each dialogue line? The music advice is, "make it shortform, make it Tik-Tok compatible, make it punchy, hit the refrain as soon as possible." What if I want that 10-minute prog rock piece? What if I want that symphony? What if I want it slow and luxurious and lazy? Movies. Series. Poetry. Bodies. Everything is "trimmed trimmed trimmed trimmed, stripped bare, you have three seconds to win me over, make it airport chic." I don't want to win you over, then, I guess. I want the fat left it. I want the pleasure and the indolence and the indulgence. Fuck this art-advice that's always "your art needs Ozempic."

[scratch-meowt]

my hottest take

[keeper-of-the-flames]

Counter point, those machines can make me a peach sprite.

[pusheenthenerdcat]

guys did you know the tech in that nefangled machine revolutionized preemie healthcare

[maimonideznuts]

[pusheenthenerdcat]

yeah the guy who invented them made incredibly precise infusion pumps (as opposed to gravity fed ivs) which not only meant they could give medications to teeny tiny babies safely, it's also used for insulin pumps and portable dialysis machines. the key element is that it's a peristaltic pump so the liquid stays in sterile tubing for safety

(unholy drink cloaca uses it to dispense precise amounts of flavored sugar syrup)

[hedgebotherer]

Then how the haters loved him,

As they shouted out with glee,

"Unholy Drink Cloaca

You'll go down in history!"

[naamahdarling]

You DON'T get this on any other site in quite this format.

[creature-adjacent]

Carnivorous plants doin this is so funny to me

They don't wanna eat their pollinators :(

[questionablepastries]

[bookhobbit]

The first rule of sewing is you can fix anything if you have patience, creativity, and a little bit of extra fabric! The second rule of sewing is AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

[conflictingheart]

[coquelicoq]

#every time I see this picture I am briefly overwhelmed#this piece of art outlived its context and milieu#but. but. in reality there is no such thing#because art is made anew with every glance. it comes to life. awakens laughing#and time compresses. softens. the past is not so much a mystery if we remember we weren’t the first to dance.#this is what art is for#this is what it can do#it doesn’t only speak to us of our own humanity#it reminds us that humanity is shared. this girl isn’t dancing in a mirror. she is dancing with a friend.#paintings don’t simply show us the world. they help teach us how to live in it. (via @robotmango)

[teaboot]

I love that I share my house with one of the most efficient apex predators millions of years of evolution could produce. I love that two of nature’s most prolific machines met and were like “hmmm. We should lay around and do nothing together”. Now we’re both fat and happy and full of meat. The hedonism of it all

[teaboot]

Humans keeping cats and dogs as family members is like three prodigy assassins being introduced in the back of a shady nightclub and 45 minutes later they’re 6 crunchwrap supremes deep passing a blunt in the back of a shag carpeted Volkswagen microbus rating Oreo varietals by fuckability

[miseria-fortes-viros]

tumblr users have the unique ability to string together sentences never before seen in all of human history and yet they conjure up such specific visceral imagery that you can’t help but be a little in awe. and i think that’s beautiful

[teaboot]

Love and peace on planet earth

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

Is "Mary Sue" Still a Valid Criticism? (pt. 1)

To start off with: The recent backlash against calling characters "Mary Sue" is valid as hell — the term is often sexist, racist, and simply unfounded. However. I do think that there is still a baby somewhere in that bathwater, and that "this character is so perfect it becomes a major flaw in the story" can still be a meaningful criticism.

Argument 1: "Mary Sue" is a valid criticism to the extent that a character like that can create the problem of excessive match between the challenges of a plot and the strengths of a character. That story is always going to be completely lacking in tension and excitement. If Jim is the world's best wizard ever to wizard, and now there's an entire book about Jim using wizardry to solve wizard-related problems... Yaaaawn. No challenge for Jim means no uncertainty, no investment in the character.

Example of this problem*: We Are Legion (We Are Bob) by Dennis E. Taylor. A very cool premise, that a human gets forcibly turned into a self-replicating android and sent to the edge of space to save humanity, became (for me) a fairly boring read. Because it becomes clear about 15% of the way in that Bob will more-or-less effortlessly solve every challenge that comes his way, using his superior intellect. I don't hate this book; it's a fun thought experiment. But it didn't exactly suck me in, because Bob gets set a series of tasks and then solves them in a fairly predictable fashion.

Counter-example: Project Hail Mary by Andy Weir. Similar concept, that one lone super-genius gets sent to the stars under similar circumstances. BUT the challenges that Grace has to solve are almost all (the horror!) interpersonal communication. We don't know if he'll ever make it back to Earth, and we don't know if he'll get eaten (or impregnated) by aliens for 90% of the length of the story. Hence, this book's well-earned reputation as a page-turner.

Tl;dr: the "Mary Sue" character can be a serious problem for a story because a character extremely well-equipped to solve their own plot problems will pretty much never create tension or interest for the audience.

Pt. 2 | Pt. 3

*Going to constrain my examples to white male protagonists that someone else has called "Mary Sue", as part of my argument that it's not all sexism.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Grace is not in any way a lone supergenius. (Unless they added that for the movie?) He solves every problem he faces with high school level science and some very rudimentary space suit and tool training. He's a mediocre biologist in the right place and time with the right genes. Project Hail Mary is the story of an extremely ordinary man rising to the occasion. Several of the people who helped him get that far are extremely skilled, though. Anyone who called Grace a Mary Sue wasn't paying any attention to the story whatsoever.

I think what you're hitting on here is what I call the Superman Rule: a character can be as overpowered as you want in as many ways as you want EXCEPT in relation to solving the important conflicts. Superman can be stronger than everyone and able to fly and have laser vision whenever the interesting conflict is about preserving his reputation, or hiding his identity, or confronting his planet's past, or trying to figure out what the evil billionaire is doing in a lead bunker. If you want the interesting thing to be a big punch-up in the sky, you need to either depower him or give him a stronger opponent.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

#I would argue Ruland is a bit more than average but definitely not super genius#he could have easily become a noteworthy specialist in his field#but his pride and inability to take criticism led to his being pushed out of the academic sphere#which I think was better for him bc he loves teaching and is very good at it#Murderbot also comes to mind for good hyper competent characters that still make for an interesting protag/story#bc the story is from its pov so we see how it struggles with anxiety and socializing and personhood#so the super human feats and hyper competentcy aren't seen as such a big deal by MB#and it infact thinks it's subpar (which is insane and a wonderful example of an unreliable narrator)

MB is SUCH a good example, so much of what it does is basically magic to the other characters. I've heard people describe MB books as deus ex machina plots from the point of view of the deus ex machina, and yet they work so well.