puppy's venting account lol

he/it .. ramco + tbmc HC-DID system .. c-ptsd/BPD/HPD/autism + .. BODILY A MINOR .. main; @r0ttingsystem

[r0ttingangels]

Extreme trigger warning on this blog. Not holding back

Hihi were the r0ttingsystem

Collective information;

He/it/cut/gut/rot

Transmasculine / transneutral afab

Aiden / demo / Otto / puppy

Hc did system of 100+ (little and introject heavy) + ramcoa and tbmc victim

BPD / HPD / C-ptsd / autism / dyslexia (+)

We're a borzoi dog therian, angelkin, ghostkin, dollkin (and more maybe)

We're bodily a minor

Blog information;

Trigger warnings for r#pe/SA, sh, abuse (all kinds) and the like(stay safe please)

Main blog: @r0ttingsystem

Made this blog because we're tired of bottling things up

We will not be naming who our abuser is

Asks and dms are open, feel free to ask anything ig? (Ik Some of you have that morbid curiosity)

Tag dictionary;

#[name].txt = to tell apart what alter posted what

#tw r = the post talks about sa/r#pe

#tw sh = the post talks about sh

#tw a = the post talks about abuse

#gen tw = general trigger warning

#puts hair behind ear hi = anon asks I've asked ( using funny haha tag because don't want the person I'm rebloging to get uncomfy or something)

Plus our singletsona / collective oc

[hc-did-culture-is]

Hc did culture is please I want to get abused again please come back I need to be assaulted please

-🪽

.

[r0ttingangels]

Tw for a very ' romanticized ' idea of death and suicide at some points, we are very delusional and just had a realization that might put us in danger, so just going to try to write it out to get it out of our head

Also this is just jumbled thoughts kinda aaa

We were always terrified of death, ever since we could remember

We remember sleeping in the same bad with our grandmother and not being able to sleep because we stressed about making sure she was breathing, at ages around 6-8 I think

One of our most vivid oldest memories is trying to wake up our father, not realizing that he was dead

We remember staying awake at night, we hadn't yet been told that he was dead, and just thinking that he was definitely gone, at age 8 (if I remember correctly)

I think that's when our phobia started getting worse, and our fascination with rot and corpses became stronger too

We're obsessed with anything dead, dead flowers, dead trees, dead animals and dead people, rotting and bleeding corpses

corpses being all around us is our most frequent delusion too

But we're also terrified, anytime anyone's sick the first thing in our mind is that they're going to die

As for ourselves, we're obsessed with the idea of being a 'dead girl/boy walking'

But that's only because we're so scared of dying, moreso, we're terrified of being forgotten

We need people to be worried, we need them to care so badly it hurts

If we look like we're dead and hurting, people are going to care

But a few minutes ago we started thinking of something

We were used to thoughts like "if I kill myself in a gory and over the to top way I won't be forgotten"

But we just started think about a more peaceful but terrifying path, about just killing ourseves and letting the earth take us, killing ourseves somewhere where we would be found, but not too soon

Being found rotting, flowers grown out of our flesh

It's making us feel at peace in the worst way

I don't know where I wanted to go with this

[r0ttingangels]

Tw/cw dumb vent about being single and mentally ill , ' romanticizing ' abuse n other bad stuff(not actually, we're just extremely unwell with no help and very delusional), this is what being painful self aware looks like I think

I don't fucking understand how were single in a world with so many sickos

Like come get me!!! I'm almost stuck at the age of 7 mentally at all times, very easily manipulated AND I will bend over all the way backwards for anyone that shows me a tiny bit of love

I will change everything and anything about myself for literally anyone, you can easily make me isolate myself from everyone around me

the only fucking thing you have to do is show me a fuckton of attention, not leave me and be exclusive

Me thinks that weirdos should stop hurting innocent kids and they should start hurting us because we deserve it

[gh0sting-along]

they mean everything to me and i treasure every happy moment i spend with them, but to them, i'm replaceable.

[r0ttingangels]

IM GOING TO KILL MYSELF

[vixensofdeath]

waking up gets harder and harder every day

[r0ttingangels]

I am SO SORRY but I read this as waking up harder and harder every day 😭

[r0ttingangels]

We just realized something and oh nonohno brain not ready for realization oh no

[r0ttingangels]

Alright good to know <3 I asked about Halloween since you reblogged something about wanting trick or treat ask that day, haha. What events are coming up for you?

- Arc

Nothing really is coming up sadly :( how about you?

[r0ttingangels]

Hi, it’s Arc! I was wondering if it’s alright if I chat with you from a side-blog? Mostly because my mains will be triggering possibly for you. Just for ease. I hope you feel better too— we all care about you. Also, early happy halloween! Do you have any plans?

- Arc

Hey hey!! I mean I don't think they'll be triggering at all but if you want to then okay!!

Things are looking better honestly too :D

Happy early Halloween!!!! We don't celebrate it here (we have a different thing though in a couple of months!!), how about you? :3

[r0ttingangels]

Most (all) of the system is s3lf harming insys life is fun

[r0ttingangels]

The fact that we genuinely associate Homestuck with trauma

[r0ttingangels]

Bad BPD episode me thinks

[sacred-portal]

[harmful-tropes]

I have a distinct memory of laying in my bed as a kid and wishing with all my heart that I would get hurt. That I would get into a bad car crash or I'd disappear. So my parents would cry and realize they didn't cherish me enough.

I find it sad that younger me thought she had to get hurt to feel loved.

[shebeezee]

wanting to ignore your fp bc you’re petty and feel like they’ve “wronged” you but literally folding the sec you see a notification from them bc god you want their attention and validation so much it’s suffocating

[hxppy-thxghts]

I don’t want to be another mistake in someones live.