An Absolute Delight

[doyouknowwhatimeme]

[serenity-bitty]

reminds me of

the shellfish allergy NO NO FUCKING S HRIMP OR HE D IE post

[p1netre3s]

reminded me of this

[lesbianmarrow]

free use is kind of a funny kink bc it relies on the idea that everybody wants to touch you and have sex with you but what if they don't. what if you tell everybody at the party you're free use but they all ignore you and mind their own business

[tunnaa-unnaa]

taking notes

[insaneandlovingit]

You would not believe your ass

If ten million largemouth bass.

[problemnyatic]

desired you while the women flee

[parakeet]

the youtube comments section rediscovering the simply joys of just doing things because you find them fun

[windsandstar]

ive got a scary math joke but im 2² to say it

[galacticxangel]

@ragnarode

[sergal]

big and cutes my me at you

[deinonychian]

#myme

[i-fuck-audis]

MY FUCKING CAR

[the-east-art]

Useful image for when your internet friends have rain in their cities and you don’t

[the-east-art]

This is one of the best posts I’ve ever made. It’s just people talking about wanting rain. Or who have too much rain and want other to have their rain.

[trollkatt]

Big Jack

Pet Foolery, #93

[only-tiktoks]

[leoriowithaknife]

[ID: The video begins with a person showing the package for a padlock. Over the video is a TikTok comment which reads "master lock has a bounty on this mans head". The person making the video begins narrating: "You won't believe this lock's special feature. It's a Master Lock model 570 maximum pick resistant pad lock. It has 5 pins, including some security pins and, if you look carefully inside the key weight, you can actully see where they put the disappointment." The video ends with the person jamming a pick into the lock, which opens it instantly. end of ID]

[partypuppynastja]

As a lockpicking hobbyist: it really is like that.

I have many padlocks (and other, uh, lockable devices) to which I probably have the keys somewhere but it's frankly quicker to pick (or in some cases, technically bypass but what most people would still call picking) the lock than find the right key.

And usually yes, that quickly.

And those tiny padlocks, to go on luggage (or, uh, other things that need tiny locks)? No need even for lockpicks, a paperclip will suffice to open it in 0.1s

[stavarosthearcane]

Now I'm used to seeing this sort of thing as I frequent the lockpickinglawyer's youtube channel so I am familiar with how Masterlock's products consistently fail to resist even the most low skill picking. Which is why when I heard the brand "masterlock" and saw the person had a wave rake (a tool for low skill picking) I knew this wouldn't take long...

I was not expecting the visceral nature of this picking; the single thrust and twist, the casual toss, the verbal disdain, the sense like you just watched something be swiftly gutted.

It was an experience.

[anywhoozles]

[pangur-and-grim]

I told my little nephew that I'd wave at his airplane when it flew over my house today, and he very calmly and politely explained that it wouldn't be possible to see me due to the limitations of human vision. I said he just had to squint real hard, and he took a deep breath and went into the toddler version of "see, what you're not understanding–"

[pangur-and-grim]

[spider-shoes-archive]

staying close w people long distance really is about the mundane stuff. i get texts like "made quesadillas" "spilled mop water all over the floor :(" "lady on the bus has not one not two but three tiny dogs in her purse" andits like wow. i love you more than words can express

[spider-shoes-archive]

happy 100k to the realest post ive ever made

[jonsaremembers]

From The Helsinki Affair, by Anna Pitoniak:

"One day, as he was texting her about the shortstop the Yankees had just traded, he thought: Why am I boring her with this? She doesn’t care about the Yankees. And then he thought: I’m telling her this because I love her."

[baked-fish]

I hate to say "some of you don't go outside," but fucking Christ, dude

[hunbunqueen]

Ouuhh I see the water it’s right there on the post,, I’m so thirsty ouyghhhhhw just one sip for me ooouuuuuu

[baked-fish]

Girl, what are you talking about? Are you feeling alright?

[beneaththegildedmoon]

Btw the heat *is* why we see water that's not really there, but mirages aren't exactly hallucinations so much as optical illusions:

It's just the changing density of the air refracting light weirdly, so it looks like there's a reflection of the sky on the ground, which our brains often interpret as a pool of water. It can also happen upwards instead of downwards, especially at sea, when the air is much colder near the surface and a warm front appears above it:

Which, btw, is one possible explanation for ghost ship sightings, so that's fun :)

[rainbowgod666]

Yeap. That's how the Effetto Fata Morgana gappens

[ausefulblogforputtingthingsin]

If you drive on a straight road in the summer you can see mirages pretty easily.

Here's Fata Morgana

[ittybittybumblebee]

bigs my eyes

[ittybittybumblebee]

bigs my eyes at you

[ittybittybumblebee]

bigs my beautious my gorgeous eyeballs

[enderbones]

[pathogenflock]

"he would not fucking say that" but about injuries. he would not fucking recover that quickly. those scars would not fucking heal like that. he would not be fucking able bodied after that. he would not be fully lucid after that.

[blackforestbride]

WHEN HE FALLS FROM A WHAT INTO THE WHAt

[blackforestbride]

?????????

?????

[blackforestbride]

WHAT IS GOING ON IN ACE ATTORNEY???

[aceattorneygame]

Nothing good.

[anti-parent]

teamwork makes the dream work. and dreamwork. makes shrek

[anti-parent]

fantastic. i love it. i posted this after my wife said it yesterday and as i was doing it i was like "this can't be an original thought. as soon as i hit post someone's going to say 'you stole this from a tweet from 2014' and i'll say 'no, i stole it from my beautiful wife.'"