this might be a controversial opinion idk, but i feel like a lot of people assign more intent to dream's ending than was actually there
like. yes his death was in part a suicide, i'm not saying it wasn't, and i've talked a lot about the reasons and motivations behind that already. but i've seen a lot of responses to my posts lately talking about how dream knew this would definitely happen and he had a plan and was doing [x] thing because he knew it would lead to his death (or the more gentle version that he didn't plan it, but saw it coming and did nothing to stop it)
which. doesn't feel like an accurate description of what happened?
because he tried to stop the kindly ones plot. he genuinely did
he knew that the furies wouldn't be persecuting him out of nowhere, that's unlike them, there's enough nuance in this situation that something else has to be spurring them. which is true. lyta invoked the furies for revenge against dream, and the blood debt is enough of a technicality that they had the power to back her
so dream goes after lyta - stop her, stop the furies. but he's met with thessaly, who predicted this, and has protected lyta inside a ritual circle, which dream can't cross. she taunts him about it (bc this kind of magic is one of the few places mortals have more power than endless), and when he asks why, she says she wanted to hurt him
alright. no stopping the furies. but dream knows they will have to meet him face to face if they want to do anything about this, so as long as they meet him in the dreaming, that's his seat of power, they won't be able to act against him in any real capacity. he'll just have to wait them out, until they tire of this or something happens to lyta
there's one more caveat though - if he leaves the dreaming willingly during their attack, he cedes that seat of power, he won't be the master of the dreaming anymore, it'll belong to them. and that's the last thing he wants, so he tells delirium when she asks that he can't go with her, he has to stay here
nuala is the breaking point. because he has still been dealing with suicidal thoughts for centuries, they're not new and they didn't go anywhere, he's just really good at ignoring those thoughts in favour of his actual responsibilities. and while he didn't intend to die here, he's more exhausted than ever, he's lost in grief over his son, and for the first time, doesn't have the strength to push those thoughts down. nuala calls him from the dreaming, because he promised her any request, and it's a good enough excuse and he's tired enough that for a moment his subconscious wins that battle
and from there he's stuck. he tries to go back to the dreaming and fix it, but it's not his anymore. so he's left with only two choices - leave, abandon all this, go somewhere far away and stop caring about everyone you left behind and what the furies may do to the dreaming in your absence - it's no longer your problem. or he can acquiesce to their demands, lyta's call for revenge
and given who dream is, that was never any kind of choice.
i think people assume he planned it all because of one of these lines
but that's the thing. when the only thing keeping you going is the fact that suicide would be the most terrible horrible act you could possibly commit (this is someone who values his responsibility over anything else! he is dutiful! the whole point is he cannot willingly abandon his post!), you definitely haven't made a plan, and you're never going to. it's an escapist fantasy that sits at the back of your mind, that's all
the things death is drilling him about here are his decision with nuala and the fact that he never chose to leave, even when he got in way over his head, that's all she questions him about in this conversation
and i don't think he's lying in his response to her
yes, he's been 'making preparations' for a while, but those are things like ensuring daniel's ascendancy, tying up loose ends with people, actions that don't lead to anything. he doesn't have to die just because he did those things, those are just emergency precautions. and they make him feel better to do, because he gets to indulge in that fantasy without doing anything about it. he can't be blamed for this, they don't mean he wants to leave, he's going to keep doing his job forever because he has to
but you know. just in case. he's just being smart about it. that's what he can tell himself, anyway
and the reason why this distinction matters so much to me is, dream really tried. we see as early as season of mists that this is what his internal monologue is like so much of the time, given the slightest excuse to give up, in this case literally just the journey between the dreaming and hell, and some part of him yearns to just abandon everything
but he tells it no. he's been telling it no for centuries. this has been a constant fight to stay alive and he's been doing it! it's not been easy, but he's been putting in so much unnoticed work to keep everything going, to not give up. and one moment of weakness that ended up being his downfall shouldn't get to erase that
and when we say that he planned this the whole time, or that he knew this would happen and let it, we're not really appreciating just how much he tried
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