how the story ends @raine-leonhart - Tumblr Blog

Stuff kids on tumblr better relearn

1. You are responsible for your own media experience.

2. There is such a thing as a healthy level of avoidance towards topics that make you feel unwell or even (in a real-life clinical definition of the term) trigger you - but you are the one to actively take care of what you view.

3. Avoiding does not mean policing others.

4. You have no right to tell artists to censor themselves - you may criticize what others do, you may dislike it, that’s fine - but actively asking for censorship when you could easily unfollow or block a person just makes you look incompetent in your use of the internet.

5. Do not give people on tumblr or /any/ website the responsibility for your emotional well-being. Because these people do not even know you so no, you have no right to ask them to take care of you.

vesperlionheart

6. Content creators are not your parents and owe you nothing, not even a breakdown on why their content isn’t problematic. You don’t get to demand a dissertation denouncing any and everything unhealthy in a piece you don’t like. Move on.

summerpipedream

7. Tagging is a nicety but not an obligation. You can message people, politely, and ask them to tag things, and many people will, but understand that it’s their blog and they aren’t obliged to say yes. Unfollow and block when you need to. Circling back to number 1, you are responsible for curating your own experience.

8. Don’t be a jerk. Remember at the end of the day, there are actual living, breathing people behind each screen name. Don’t say anything you wouldn’t say to someone’s face in real life.

pixie-mage

I cannot stress enough how important it is to remember this.

stonerwitch

im not a fan of the “i dont owe anyone anything EVER” sentiment that a lot of people who create shit that is harmful have

stonerwitch

this way of thinking is also how so many kids in fandom get groomed. the adults dont care about them and dont protect them. being 24 now and seeing adults way older than me have this opinion (especially when the og post was posted when i was 16) is worrying.

raine-leonhart

The last poster has it backwards. If a kid isn't old enough and mature enough to engage with fandom responsibly, they shouldn't be there. The spaces were not made for kids, and the people who made them do not need to leave them because they don't want to make them "safe spaces" for kids. How entitled can you be.

renthony

Bodily autonomy includes the right to do drugs. Yes, even the drugs YOU think are bad and scary and dangerous.

People absolutely deserve access to free, compassionate recovery resources, but ONLY if they want them and find them useful.

You have to understand just how many "rehab" programs are effectively prisons, cults, or both. You have to understand and be compassionate toward the reasons behind self-medication. And above all else, you have to LISTEN to drug users about what is actually effective, useful, and wanted aid.

Otherwise you're just part of the problem.

raine-leonhart

So understand that this is coming from a place of deep anger.

My brother died of an overdose of meth and a cocktail of other illegal hard drugs in August. He always had issues with drugs all of his life, but he spiraled especially hard the last 6 months before he died.

He left behind 3 kids. Two are technically adults (23 and 19), one is 13. All three of them are in my house and I am officially raising the teenager. Previously, I was child free by choice.

So no, I don't believe in his "right" to do whatever hard drugs he wanted. He has scarred our family for life, and i am left trying to pick up the pieces. He abused (physically and mentally) these boys their entire lives. Would he have anyway? Maybe, but certainly not to the degree of causing multiple car accidents that resulted in his and their physical injuries. Certainly not by going through withdrawals and getting so enraged, he beat their skulls against porcelain tubs or put them through walls.

Your right to do anything ends the minute you hurt other people. Fuck bodily autonomy in that case.

I agree to access to free and safe treatment for addiction, but a "regulated market" is bullshit. Anyone who thinks that wouldnt make the situation worse has never experienced what picking up the pieces left by an addict looks like. They've never desperately fought to stop an addict from ruining their and their kids' lives.

I don't care if you've met an addict or you had an addiction problem. If you are/were an addict, you have hurt others around you to one degree or another, even if you don't know it. And you probably didn't care at the time because the addiction trumps everything else. You may not care now.

We treat diseases for a reason and addiction is a disease. But a disease isn't a free pass to hurt others.

So no, it's not "bodily autonomy" to respect an addict's "right" to do drugs. They don't have that right.

Fix rehab systems. Fix the prison system. Those are the actual issues you should be focusing on. Not giving people better access to the tools to kill themselves and hurt others.

bli-o

wait gays stop scrolling for a second just curious how old were you guys when you figured out what any form of queerness was. Not just homosexuality like anything from the alphabet army

How old were you when you first heard about anything queer?

I’ve pretty much always known

4-9

10-13

14-18

19-25

26-35

46-59

60+

not queer, see results

Voting ended onSep 27, 2023

it was like? 10ish for me. Maybe 9.

(not when you discovered YOU were gay/trans/ace/intersex btw, when you learned they EXISTED)

raine-leonhart

I'd be curious to see this cross referenced with responders age

blanketmoth-deactivated20231216

rb with your usual coffee order yes this is profoundly boring but i dont CARE i want to KNOW

#dirty chai latte

fumblebeefae

We need to better educate kids on the importance of animals that are typically hated because otherwise you end up with adults who think hating wasps is a personality.

insufferable-yapper

I can understand defending beds but wasps :/

fumblebeefae

I’m very much going to encourage you to drop the “I hate wasp” trend of the 2010’s and instead go appreciate and learn about the wonderful world of wasps.

Because they are just so many species of them. They’ve been around since at least the Jurassic period (~145 mya) and they’re one of the most diverse groups of insects because of it.

For example I just went and caught these two wasps in my backyard one afternoon. They’re both tiny Ichneumonoidea wasps (also known as Darwin wasps) and are the most diverse wasp groups. They don’t sting, but instead have these unmodified long ovipositors (as stingers are just modified ovipositors which again, is just a beautiful bit of evolution right there). They use them to drill into wood or other insects / spiders in order to lay their legs.

One on the left may be Braconidae and one on the right Ichneumonidae.

And we found these two tiny cuckoo wasps (so small we had to put them under a microscope to get a good photo) in our lab a while ago. The photos don’t do them justice because they’re just stunningly shiny which is why they’re also called jewel wasps or emerald wasps.

insufferable-yapper

I don’t hate wasps because of some of stupid. I hate wasps because when I was 5 I apparently stood slightly too close to a wasp hive (I was like 5 feet away and not even looking at them) and got stung five times before I was able to get away from them

fumblebeefae

The “I was stung when I was a kid” story is the same thing you haters always say. And every time I care less and less.

raine-leonhart

So your personality is liking wasps

angelsonthesideline-deactivated

empressgreyofphoenix

Capitalism does make things a hell of a lot harder for those of us with ADHD, but it's still a disability, with or without it. I understand where this person is coming from, but this isn't the best argument to make.

raine-leonhart

Something is a disorder when it negatively impacts your life to a degree that your quality of life is lowered. I don't care if I live under capitalism or not, my ADD symptoms are going to negatively impact my ability to accomplish daily tasks.

azuremist

Let’s clear some things up!

This is the rainbow infinity symbol. It’s the symbol for autism, and autism alone, as it was created for AUTISTIC Pride Day!

This is the rainbow butterfly! It’s intended to be an ADHD symbol. It was made by an allistic ADHDer, purely out of spite for autistic people who stated the rainbow infinity symbol was theirs. It’s not just that the creator is anti-autistic; it’s that the design was purposefully created to be similar to the rainbow infinity symbol, making it so that the anti-autistic bias is a key part of its design.

This is the black butterfly! It is also an ADHD symbol. Except this one wasn’t made solely to spite autistic people.

The black butterfly is still somewhat similar to the autistic symbol, but that’s a-okay! ADHD and autism are similar! It makes sense that the symbols would be similar. The difference lies in if it was made similar from a place of malice, or a place of desired solidarity. And the black butterfly is free from any malicious intentions towards autistic people (not just in its creator, but also in its design).

Please take this information into consideration while using these symbols!

— an autistic ADHDer 🩷

woolieshubris

I wanted to do some research into the butterfly symbols origins, as I was curious. It seems like both the black butterfly and the rainbow one were created by the *same* person?

A bit about the ADHD neurodiversity butterfly symbol.

The accepted neurodiversity symbol is a rainbow infinity symbol This symbol is, however, most strongly associated with people with Autism Spectrum Disorder. As someone with ADHD I was looking for something to represent me and positive attitudes to ADHD, decided to combine this with the symbolism of a butterfly and designed the image you see at the top. The ADHD neurodiversity butterfly keeps the basic figure-of-eight shape, representing neurodiversity as a whole, but with and ADHD-centric butterfly twist. If you like it, there are several versions below in B&W as well as colour, and on both black and white backgrounds. I am releasing these images free of any copyright, and you’re welcome to use them as you wish.

-ADHD GRRL on the creation of the butterfly symbol

Also, it doesn't seem like it was made out of malice- rather the opposite. Not wanting to co-opt something that was representative of the autistic community, but wanting to maintain a link in terms of the design (infinity symbol + rainbow)

The origins of the rainbow infinity are unknown for the most part- however it's existed for a while. I've seen it also used as a symbol for neurodiversity in general, however nowadays I see it mostly used as a symbol for autism specifically.

Sorry for the infodump! I just didn't want misinformation to go around.

azuremist

It was purposefully made to mimic the infinity sign because she wanted to use the rainbow infinity symbol, but it was “most strongly associated” with autistic people, so she “combined” the autistic symbol (something she has no claim to) with an ADHD symbol. (Which would more suitably make an auDHD symbol.) But she wanted to purposefully incorporate the design of the autistic infinity symbol (the rainbow) into her design, BECAUSE it was so recognizable while ALSO acknowledging that it wasn’t hers to use.

TLDR this isn’t misinformation, the rainbow butterfly’s rainbow coloring was added specifically to mimic the autistic infinity symbol, specifically because the autistic symbol excluded allistic ADHDers.

We have a different interpretation of her motives and that’s fine but don’t call other interpretations of her actions “misinformation”.

woolieshubris

Okay, I just simply disagree with your interpretation of that then. I'm glad you know the origins though!

raine-leonhart

Originally the rainbow infinity symbol was for neurodiversity and the gold infinity symbol was specifically for autism. Which should be a lesson in how very common symbols will always carry more than one meaning.

animentality

sirartwork

loracarol

I have another dog to put on this theoretical show. The original story can be found at this link. If the link breaks, it's a story on NotAlwaysRight called "Absolutely The Goodest Boy"

darktwistedgenderplural

The last story is a story about lacking free prenatal health care. It's horrifying to think of a system so broken that women die because of such a fundamental failiure.

raine-leonhart

I don't see anywhere that says anything about the coworker having any issue with her prenatal Healthcare. Gestational diabetes can come on quite suddenly, so it's not uncommon for someone to find out when their sugar crashes the first time.

lifeattomsdiner

every time somebody goes "uhm well this work depicts X, which seems kinda problematic >.>" and said depiction of X is specifically that it is a bad thing done by bad people, my blood pressure goes up a little bit

raine-leonhart

I know precisely nothing about owl house so maybe there's more context here but OMG does this piss me off. Not only is it just fucking ridiculous, implying that genocide means antisemitism ignores the fact that there have been genocides targeting so, so, so many different people and cultures from all parts of human history. Considering how often people want to pretend that genocides haven't happened, this makes me foam at the mouth with rage.

manstrans

I don't think people on this website understand what "you should love jewish people more than you hate nazis" means

do you hate nazis because they're fun to hate on and easy to ratio? or because of the material harm they have caused, are causing, and will continue to cause? when you see a nazi, do you see an acceptable target? or do you see an active threat? what do you do to help jewish people outside of these situations? anything at all? do you have positive views on judaism? do you try to better yourself by listening to jewish voices on topics of bigotry?

I'm not going to complain about a nazi getting punched for being a nazi, but the issue isn't as simple as just punching nazis. you need to love jewish people more than you hate nazis if you want to address the root causes of antisemitism

raine-leonhart

Not to try and to steal a post about antisemitism, but hating nazis should always be about supporting all of the communities they are harming, recognizing the intersections between many of those communities (for example, disabled lgbt+ jewish individuals), and doing your best to uplift them. Punching nazis is never wrong, but it is far more important to offer support and love to their victims than violence to nazis. Don't forget that.

It's also important to realize that neo nazis don't have the exact same agenda Hitler did and to recognize all of the victims that are now at risk and doing our best to protect them. All neo nazis also aren't so kind as to gather under one banner with a single ideology, so recognizing what is actually fascist ideology vs something you don't like hearing someone say online is very important.

Destroying and rooting out deeply buried antisemitism in Western culture is a huge part of this as Jewish people have become the poster child (for lack of a better term, I realize it's not a great one) of who nazis hate and hurt the most. Ignoring antisemitic views or even indirectly supporting them, but thinking you are doing your part just because you hate nazis isn't enough. I can assure you that vulnerable and discriminated against communities would rather hear you are supporting them in tangible ways than that you hate nazis.

Protect the vulnerable, do your best to support victims (in many cases, fellow victims, as many many minority groups are targeted by these people), and form a community that is stronger than hate and violence. Also punch nazis.

#i apologize if this is only semi coherent #my adhd meds are still in my pocket and not my mouth thos morning #also i apologize if this seems like i was coopting a post about antisemitism #my intention is to foster intercommunity support and not undermine the very real concerns of jewish individuals

mclennonyaoi

i think the the thing is that some people believe the only problem with terf rhetoric and radical feminism is that it excludes trans people. and that ideas stemming from terf circles are almost good and would be good if they just included trans people.

mclennonyaoi

which is why, i guess, when you say to these people- “you’re spreading terf rhetoric. you should not do that” they say “but i include trans people. so it’s good” because they have, at their core, a misunderstanding of trans exclusive radical feminism. you can’t just make the ideas “good” by saying “trans women are women” and including them in your idea of womanhood. because the ideas are flawed and bigoted all the way down. you can’t just say “men are invading women/lesbian spaces” and include trans women. it doesn’t work like that. it’s still terf rhetoric, and eventually you will circle back to excluding trans people. you’re just dressing it up in a little progressive costume.

mclennonyaoi

case in point. putting the word “cis” before this and pretending that it includes trans people does not make this any less of blatant terf rhetoric.

raine-leonhart

Someone needs to hold a big mandatory lecture for this website about what radical feminism is and why it's bad that doesn't just boil down to "terfs" bc if you think excluding Trans folk is the only shitty take radfems have, boy do I have bad news for you

homunculus-argument

The way people just assume that their experiences are universal. No thoughts, opinions or feelings about it. I'm just observing it.

"I'm not disabled in any way but I always go out of my way to avoid doing this completely normal everyday thing able-bodied people can do because doing that causes me physical pain."

Dude.

"I'm not gay or anything, but on average you really do see more good-looking men than you see good-looking women."

Bruh.

"It must really suck to have ADHD or something, I mean I forget what I was doing every 30 seconds and get yelled at about it at least twice a day, it would suck if that was like a clinical thing."

Brother.

"I'm perfectly happy being a cis man but wouldn't everyone rather be a woman if they had the chance?"

Ma'am.

tinker-tanner

Oh man, that last one is way too real. I assumed that manhood was like jury duty for everyone: it was unpleasant, it took too long, and you couldn't escape it without being especially tricky, but you just had to go through with it as the price of living in society.

In high school, I was completely baffled when this guy in the grade above mine came out as a trans man. Not hateful or shitty, just very confused. Externally, I went "All right, good for him! It couldn't have been easy for him to cope with it in Catholic school." Internally, I went "Why the hell would anyone do this? Some people like being men enough to do it on purpose? Why would anyone, given a golden opportunity to be a woman, instead choose to be a man??"

foone

Manhood is like jury duty and I'm explaining jury nullification in the pre-selection room

egg-tats

brain issues are the wildest example of this.

I have aphantasia and it took me more than 30 goddamn years to realize that when people say they're picturing something in their mind they're like picturing something. like an image. ya'll are out here ACTUALLY rotating cows mentally while I'm stuck simply observing the literal physical reality around me. I don't know what that could be like, and neither of us could have the language to make me understand it.

I have ADHD and it took me more than thirty cursed years on this planet to realize that other people literally can sometimes not think something. intentionally! not just when they're asleep! "clearing your mind" is a thing they're able to do and on having done so it doesn't make them physically uncomfortable! I'm out here drowning out The Horrors with a podcast about critical worldbuilding, smart characterization, and fun interactions between good friends. meanwhile you're choosing zen tranquility while you do the dishes.

(if you're wondering "does the first issue make the second one worse" hey same! I wonder if adhd people who can spin cows all day long can just do that instead of The Horrors. sound off in the comments if spinning cows ward your mind!)

raine-leonhart

As someone with ADHD who had never considered spinning cows in my brain all day, I will now be spending way more time doing just that. Thank you? I think?

animentality

jurassicpark02

alright i guess i have to talk about all this purity culture shit disourcse now:

sex scenes in movies are weird. i dont know who said it isn't, and is all of a sudden the final dictator on that: they make me uncomfortable. i don't like watching them, and the most i'll find uncomfortable is laying in bed next to each other covered up in blankets talking. and honestly, the actual sex scenes (mostly just ones where its mostly muffled breathing, zoomed in shots of skin, etc) are NOT WARNED. it only really gets warned if we actually see someone's boobs or something. a lot of the time, the warnings will just say "sexual". this can mean a variety of things - talking about sex, flirting, the laying in bed thing, or actual sex scenes. and if you want to know if they actually do sex scenes or not? you have to search, actually search on those stupid parent websites, where they don't know how to explain if it was an actual sex scene or not and all they can say is "well i wouldn't let my two year old watch this! haha"

another thing: "if you look into someone's window, and you see them ugly banging, that's on you." many MANY windows are very easily accessible and viewable from the street: you can just be walking and looking around, and oh, there goes the neighbors fucking again right infront of the window in clear view. public sex is against the law; but once you're between a layer of glass, it's alright, right?

people are mad about sex scenes in tv because of how seemly prevalent it is. if you want to watch a family okay movie, you end up watching a mild comedy or a feel good pg 13 movie that's 90 minutes long.

yes, i agree. sex scenes in tv is not sexual assault; but it doesn't take away from the fact that they make many uncomfortable, and they are not as easy to avoid as you may think. also, lets not take away this fact: many teens watch rated r movies and on par tv shows because they and their parents are fine with gore, violence, swears, etc. but that does not mean that because they are fine with violence that they are fine with sex!! AND IT DOES NOT MEAN THEY ARE FALLING VICTIM TO FACIST PROPAGANDA. NOT EVERYTHING IS FUCKING PROPAGANDA.

raine-leonhart

Looking into people's windows is illegal, fam. So, no, fucking in front of a window in their own house is in no way public sex. You looked in the window, accidental or not. Hate it for you.

mrotiski

international cut your hair like your icon day how screwed are you

#its a mask tho #can i have skull kid's hair?#i kinda already do really

cooking-with-hailstones

One day they will make a 3D Zelda with hair that doesn't mildly bug me.

I love Zelda, I love so many aspects of her character designs. She's such a cool character. But her hair consistently breaks my immersion in a way that many other characters just don't, so I am compiling a silly little list.

My credentials for this are the fact that I am a person with long hair who dabbles in hairstyling and I like doing my hair with braids and ribbons. I am also in theater, and purveyor of historical hairstyles.

This is a very unserious and rambling rant, so please bear with me! No shade and no harm meant. This is me having fun.

Alright, down to business.

CATEGORY 1: NO BUT SERIOUSLY, HOW THICK IS YOUR HAIR? OFFENDERS: BOTW/TOTK Zelda

That is a thicccc braid she's got there, but she simultaneously has long flowing hair (botw) that would need to be incorporated into the braid, OR her hair is shoulder length (totk) and you cannot physically make a braid that looks like that with hair that short. ALSO, the braid is very thick, starting from the crown of the head, while not incorporating any hair around it?

It looks like a fake braid headband (which is, I believe, what most cosplayers end up using). If you reeeally wanted to give her a headband, you could use a circlet or a ribbon.

Which brings me to...

CATEGORY 2: PHYSICS DEFYING RIBBONS OFFENDERS: SS Zelda and TP Zelda

I really do not understand this design choice at all. Ribbons are used to style hair in the real world all the time, but the only way I can conceivably see these ribbons staying in her hair is if they're made of velcro, or they're sticky. Either way, sounds painful. (Cosplayers how do you pull this off? I'm assuming glue?) Now, hair wrapping using string, ribbon or fabric is a common practice in many parts of the world, but you need strong tension, a full wrap around the hair, and these wraps usually begin at the scalp. An artist friend said that this was likely a way of getting around having to render braids. Which, fine, I am not an artist, but then why not just have those two locks of hair falling forward like normal? All you need to do is delete the ribbons. And if you insist on having that splash of colour, maybe you could give her some earrings or something?

CATEGORY 3: THE DE-BUTCHIFICATION OFFENDERS: OOT Zelda, Tetra

So I have no issues with the respective hair of any of these characters. My qualm is the immediacy of the transition, and the resulting sudden new length. Because I guess Zelda has to be super femme and that means she has to have long flowing locks when she transforms out of her pirate outfit/masculine sheikah disguise, so no more short hair for you! (Also, you can't be cute and femme and have melanin, apparently?? But that's a whole other issue...)

(And despite my beef with the overly chonky braids, I must give kudos to totk Zelda for righting this injustice. #shorthairzeldarights)

HONOURABLE MENTION: I REFUSE TO BELIEVE YOU CAN FIGHT IN THESE CONDITIONS OFFENDER: AOC Impa

I just had to include this, because I otherwise love the design for Impa in AOC, but the way I feel about this hair is similar to how most of tumblr feels about boob plate armor. You mean to tell me that this highly trained, stealth and combat expert fighter would wear her hair this long and this loose, when she is often in melee situations where someone grabbing and pulling your hair could absolutely be deadly?? Nah. (She also suffers from the same "how is your hair so thicccc??" issue as AoC/BotW Zelda)

Anyways that concludes my very silly rant. I will again add the disclaimer that I know dick all about character design, I just know how to style my thigh length hair with ribbons and braids. If you disagree, or you have any that I missed, I welcome your thoughts!

raine-leonhart

As for Impa, allowing again for the extra flair of length and volume for visual character design, warriors have had and worn long hair in many cultures historically. The idea that a warrior must wear his hair shortly cropped or tied back hasn't always been common practice.

Spartans, probably the best warriors ancient Greece had to offer, were well known for having long hair. The old Norse, Persians, Macedonians, Mongols, Visigoths, Scottish, Welsh, and many Native American tribes like the Lakoda all have historical evidence of warriors with long hair that was not always worn tied back when in battle. Many times, this would be under some kind of helmet, but not always.

#more 5am ramblings