So I've watched Goncharov about a hundred times at this point....
Why the fuck is no one talking about the symbolism of jewelry in Katya's relationships?!?!?
Like, Katya is a woman who takes pride in her appearance which obviously becomes a reflection of her mental state, and by extension the state of her relationships with Goncharov and Sofia, throughout the film. In the beginning of the film, Katya is wearing diamonds and pearls (both of which form from adverse circumstances), which reflects her elegance and sophistication as Donna Goncharova but it's also a subtle way to show the cracks in her marriage. Goncharov uses expensive jewelry as a way of avoiding hard conversations about their issues, always finding a way to bring up how much each piece costs as a way of trying to cut off Katya's frustrations, and the snide way he jokes about it during the cocktail scene is telling of how fragile their relationship has become, especially when the film juxtaposes the elaborate diamond and pearl necklace he gives her right before the infamous carnival scene with the simple pearl earrings that she tells us were a gift from their first anniversary.
In contrast, you have the sea glass bracelet that Sofia buys for her in the marketplace. It is, in Valery's words, a "cheap trinket" but Sofia picked it out for her because it matches her eyes!!! To Sofia, the bracelet is a token of affection but to Katya it is so much more because for the first time in years, someone gave her a gift because they wanted to make her happy, not show off how much money they spend on her! And we as the audience can clearly see how much she cherishes that bracelet, the way she leaves her expensive jewelry all over her vanity, not caring even when she loses the new diamond earrings that Goncharov just bought while carefully tucking the bracelet into its own jewelry case whenever she isn't wearing it.
And the way that the film contrasts how Goncharov and Sofia give her the jewelry; Goncharov is careless when giving her the new jewelry cases, tossing them around, barely even looking at Katya when he gives her a "present" because the gifts are obligations now, much like their relationship has become for the both of them, a part they play with each other, a hollow echo of past love. While Sofia doesn't just look at her when giving her the bracelet, she fastens it on Katya's wrist herself and tells her how beautiful it looks on her. She sees Katya, the good, the bad, and the damaged, and reminds her that like sea glass, her broken parts don't have to keep hurting her, that it's okay to let time soften the sharp edges of her grief.
Idk, maybe I'm crazy but I always go crazy when a character's appearance becomes a part of the themes of a film and Katya is such a pivotal character in the film that I'm surprised more people aren't talking about this.
What do you mean âchatâ is now referring to ChatGPT and not twitch chat? What? What? What the fuck? No?
When I address chat I am speaking to a presumed Greek chorus of real human people shitposting on their lunch break, not a machine that devours lakes to covert electricity into slop.
As someone who's been that person, I'd say it means the problem has been declared "not simple". Whether that's "bad" depends on exactly what the problem is and how badly you need the thing in the next 15 to 450 minutes.
i love prince eric. Â from the little mermaid. Â heâs hilarious. Â because he seems like one of the most mild-mannered and unassuming princes in the disney canon, but he is also one of the few to actively kill the bad guy. Â most disney villains die by consequence of the final battle but are not directly killed by the hero/heroine. Â most of them fall to their deaths or cause their own demise, and sometimes the hero is indirectly responsible because theyâll launch them into that direction or something, but they still donât bring knife to heart directly. Â
but then a couple do. Â and prince eric is my fave out of those few because up until the final act, he is the most chill motherfucker u ever seen. Â like he is quick to spring to action during the storm scene n stuff, but otherwise? Â heâs really quiet n sensitive and runs along the beach playing the flute for his big shaggy dog n he smiles like a lil nerd and gets all cute around ariel and heâs so sweet n everything.
AND THEN IN THE FINAL BATTLE THAT MOTHERFUCKER STRAIGHT UP DRIVES A SHIP THROUGH URSULA LIKE WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!!!! Â NO WONDER NO ONE IS TRYIN TO LAY SIEGE TO HIS KINGDOM!! Â ALL THE NEIGHBOURS ARE LIKEÂ âHOLY SHIT DONâT GO THERE! PRINCE ERIC IS A BEAST! Â HEâLL STRAIGHT UP DRIVE A BOAT THROUGH YOUR BITCH!â
At the beginning of the movie Prince Eric, without hesitation, jumps into the ocean, in the middle of a storm, and climbs onto a ship thatâs on fire, all to rescue his dog.
Then when heâs convinced some mystery woman saved him, he starts looking for her just to thank her. On his way, he meets some mute naked teenage girl who canât even walk or dress herself, confirms that sheâs not the girl heâs looking for, then brings her to stay at his castle anyway, for no particular reason.
No one questions this, just like they donât question when he shows up three days later with a mysterious woman one morning and says heâs getting married that same day. At said wedding, several witnesses see his fiance turn into a sea monster, which he then murders by piloting a submerged ship pulled up from the bottom of the ocean straight into her.
A week later, he marries the mute girl and the god of the sea himself rises from the ocean to give his blessings. Again, no one questions this.
Iâm convinced that Eric had to have done some crazy insane stunts on a regular basis, cause despite him being so chill and relaxed normally, no one bats an eyelash at any of his ridiculous decisions or incredible feats during the course of the film. Clearly theyâre all used to it, and rumours of him marrying an ocean princess would only dissuade potential enemies of his country even further.
whenever I see archeological remains of a human who suffered from a terrible disease that couldnât be treated in their lifetime but could be fixed now, this wave of sorrow and mourning washes over me. a woman in the 14th century who spent her 35 years of life bent at the waist because of congenital scoliosis. a man from the 18th century who died because of a non cancerous mass on his jaw that made eating progressively more difficult. remains of a woman from the Neolithic who died in childbirth having evidence of peri-mortem trepanation on her skull.
and yet she survived to 35. and yet the physicians in his time tried to strengthen his jaw. and yet someone 4,000 years ago tried to save someone they loved from dying of preeclampsia/increased cranial pressure. we tried. we tried and we tried and we tried. we failed and we learned but we tried. thatâs what makes humans so beautiful.
My mom sometimes talks about a child in her neighborhood who was born with hydrocephaly and died of it. His parents strove to keep him alive for years, but he ultimately passed after a long decline. No treatment available. No hope at all, and the parents knew it from his birth.
Several decades later my sister had an MRI, as a long shot, to try to figure out why she was sick and deteriorating with a number of symptoms that were close to being written off as anxiety. She was sent straight to the hospital for adult onset hydrocephaly. Two days later she had brain surgery to put a shunt down her neck into her stomach and drain the fluid out. (No, you cannot usually get brain surgery that fast. Yes, it was that urgent.) Recovery was long and squiggly but it happened.
I think of that boy every once in a while. The one who died. I have no doubt that treatments developed for people like him, and tested on people like him, saved my sister's life.
He never knew he made the world better. His condition was severe, he never knew much of anything, I don't think. I think if I ever track down a God or something like one, that'll be somewhere on my List of Wishes. To make sure people like him know that they helped.
I've been type 1 diabetic since I was about one and a half, and was incredibly sick. If my mother hadn't also been type 1 and recognized the signs I likely would have died.
I was born in 1982. Insulin was first given to a patient in 1922, and he survived. Before that, type 1 meant death, often very slow and agonizing. Before insulin, doctors advised a super strict "keto" diet to prolong life, and it could work for awhile - up to a year, I believe. But it was a miserable existence as the body was literally eating itself as the blood turned acidic until the patient eventually died.
60 years. Only 60 years before my birth did that procedure work for the first time. That's absolutely nothing given the span of human history and I think a lot about the people who died from it throughout time.
But yes, people tried. Healers and doctors of all sorts tried all manner of things to allow these (mostly!) kids to live. The fact that it was accomplished at all is nothing short of a miracle. The fact that I've been alive 42 years is fucking insane considering my body doesn't produce a hormone necessary for survival. If you think that doesn't blow me away on a regular basis you have another think coming. It's nothing short of a miracle.
Every medical advancement is. The amount of work that goes into it and the vast amount of luck necessary to get it right even when all the research and information is sound is just astonishing.
Thank you, humanity. Thank you ingenuity and determination to save lives and make them better. Thank you to every medical practitioner and medical researcher in existence now and through all of time. Thank you to all the people who died so I could live.
Diabetes is one of these illnesses that really throws medical history into perspective. It's so common, everyone knows someone who has it, people live pretty normal lives with it. And yet, a hundred years ago, it was an instant death sentence. And then we were able to treat people with insulin and yet - it was extremely disabling. The insulin was extracted from animal pancreas had severe side effects, even with how similar the hormones are, there is always an averse reaction to proteins from foreign species, especially during long-term treatment. Injections had to be given every few hours, at-home-tests were only available from the 70s onwards. Insulin pumps entered the market in the 80s. Genetically produced insulin - humanized insulin - was first available in the US in 1982, in many countries only around the year 2000.
In 1930, having diabetes type I would basically mean being hospital bound, being woken every few hours for regular injections.
In 1965, you'd be able to live at home and get by with a very strict diet and a few timed injections. You'd struggle with chronical side effects. Having children wasn't done - passing on your genes would be immoral, and it might not even be legal for you to marry.
In the year 2000, you'd have a device clipped to your belt that would measure your blood sugar and distribute insulin, you only need to change the needle a few times a day. You might even be allowed to join in P.E. class
In 2025, you stick on two patches that do the same thing. They're synchronized through your phone.
That wasn't fate. It's not natural development that made diabetes a common chronic illness. It was hundreds of people who cared. It was the people who created the keto diet. It was the people who came up with tests. The ones who went through different species, trying to figure out the closest analogon to human insulin. It was the people who fought in court to get genetically produced insulin approved for medical use. It was people who looked at a rare, incurable disease and said "but what if it wasn't?"
âA sleeping mother snow leopard curled up in a doughnut shape, front paws resting against her back, while her tiny, eyes-and-ears-closed kitten nuzzles into the fur of her belly and wraps their arm around herâ
If you ask anyone but the Batfam who the most terrifying member of the batfam is, you'll get a lot of answers. Batman is of course the most popular response, but you'll also see people pointing to Robin, Red Hood, Black Bat, Oracle, Red Robin, Nightwing, even a few for Spoiler or Signal.
If you ask a member of the Batfam who's the scariest, they will all without argument point to Alfred.
(The funniest part of this, to me, is that I was actually OSHA certified at one point in my life, and I can hear my instructorâs wails of despair in my head every time I build something like this.)
time travel AU where r2d2 is the one who goes back to the clone wars but not in the standard âsame body new memoriesâ way. now thereâs just two r2s running around the galaxy: one trying to kill the chancellor and another that could be easily convinced to kill the chancellor. their meeting wouldnât have any time travel ramifications besides doubling the number of r2 units trying to kill the palpatine. this efficiently doubles as c3poâs personal hell.
It started, as these things often did, with Clockwork showing up at 3:07 AM in Dannyâs bedroom and dragging him out of bed by the ankle like a disappointed father dealing with a child who had failed Algebra. Again.
âWhaâClockwork?!â Danny shouted, flailing in his space-themed pajama pants as he was unceremoniously yanked into a swirling portal of green and purple time goop. âI have school in four hours!â
âYou wonât need it where youâre going,â Clockwork said with the kind of deadpan that made you suspect he hadnât laughed in several centuries.
âThat sounds like a threat.â
âIt is.â
Next thing Danny knew, he was falling face-first onto a Persian rug that smelled faintly of incense, ancient secrets, and emotional trauma. He groaned and looked up just as a swirling portal closed behind him, revealing a tall, caped man sipping tea with the patience of a man who had seen God, mocked Him, and been promptly smacked in the face for it.
âStephen Strange,â Clockwork said, materializing again because apparently he didnât believe in exits, âmeet Daniel Fenton. Youâre going to teach him how to not accidentally vaporize the concept of space.â
âI what?â Danny blinked.
âWaitâthis is the child you were talking about?â Strange said with a distinct expression of âI expected someone taller and more eldritch.â
Danny raised a hand. âHi. Still in my pajamas. Please explain.â
Clockwork gave him a look. âYouâve been randomly tearing holes in the multiverse with your emotions. If you continue, youâll accidentally delete the timeline where pizza was invented.â
Danny went pale. âThatâs my favorite timeline!â
âThatâs why youâre here.â
And thatâs how Danny ended up training at the Sanctum Sanctorum instead of going to college like a normal eighteen-year-old. Not that Danny was ever normal. Or functional. Or even consistently corporeal at this point.
âWhy is there a ghost teenager eating cold Pop-Tarts in my artifact room?â Wong asked the next morning, frozen mid-step with the sling ring still on his fingers.
âI live here now,â Danny said through a mouthful of Strawberry Frosted. âClock Daddy said so.â
Wong stared at Strange. âWe donât even let you eat in here.â
âHeâs technically a spectral demi-being empowered by quantum echoes,â Strange muttered. âIâm not sure he can be stopped.â
Danny quickly became the Sanctumâs chaos gremlin. The Cloak of Levitation hated him, loved him, used him as a chew toy, and then dragged him into a corner and cuddled him while he tried to watch anime at 2AM. Danny responded by naming it âBlanky.â The Cloak permitted this. Wong did not.
There was one particular week when Danny got stuck halfway between dimensions because he got emotional watching a Pixar movie. âI JUSTâTHEY FORGOT ABOUT BING BONG, STRANGE, THEY FORGOTââ
âKid, I swear to the Vishanti, if you collapse another nexus realm because of childrenâs mediaââ
âHE SACRIFICED HIMSELF FOR JOY, OKAY?â
Training with Strange was like being punched in the brain repeatedly with Shakespearean insults and quantum theory. Danny tried. He did. But he was more of a vibes-based learner, while Strange was a ârecite this 900-word incantation backwards while dodging metaphysical arrowsâ type of teacher.
âI can just blast it, though?â Danny argued, half-asleep, floating upside-down above the kitchen one night.
âNo. No blasting. No phasing. No yelling ghostly wail and reducing my library to ash.â
âBut Iâm good at those!â
âYou also set the Time Fractal on fire.â
âIt had a face. It looked at me first.â
Clockwork would appear now and then, mostly to drop Danny cryptic warnings like âAvoid the one with the metal arm,â or âNever trust a raccoon with a gun,â or âDonât play Uno with Loki. He cheats.â
âI donât even know a Loki,â Danny protested.
âYou will.â
Dannyâs powers kept getting weirder. One time he coughed and spat up ectoplasm that turned into a sentient clone of himself, but with an Australian accent and a nicotine addiction. They had to banish him to the Mirror Dimension after he started flirting with Strange.
âWho made you like this?â Strange hissed, trying to undo the spell with rapidly twitching fingers.
âI think I made myself like this,â Danny whispered.
Somehow, the multiverse noticed. A portal opened on a Tuesdayâbecause of course it didâand dropped in Peter Parker mid-panic with a half-dead demon strapped to his back and a terrified expression.
âHELP! I DONâT KNOW WHAT IâM DOING!â
Danny stared, eating a microwaved burrito. âAre you a spider?â
âAre you a ghost?!â
âDo you want a burrito?â
âYes?!â
And thatâs how Danny accidentally made a new best friend. Peter and Danny had exactly the same amount of brain cell(s), which meant Strange had to install magical barriers to keep them from combining into a singularity of disaster.
âStop bringing the Spider-Child into my Sanctum!â
âHe brought himself! Through a hole! In the air! Like me!â
âOh god, there are two of them now,â Wong muttered, lighting incense aggressively.
The Sanctum slowly became a hub for the weird and unstable. Kamala Khan stopped by and declared Danny her new weird older cousin. America Chavez tried to punch him once and fell into his thermos. Loki found him and said, âAh. Youâre one of those,â and walked away very quickly.
One particularly cursed day, Tony Stark walked in, saw Danny floating above a bowl of ramen while casually moving furniture with his mind, and said, âNope,â before immediately walking out.
Dannyâs magic wasâŚunconventional. When Strange taught him how to summon a shield, Danny ended up with a glowing neon green circle that said âNOPEâ in ghostly cursive. When told to summon a blade, Danny pulled out a glowing halberd shaped like a Fenton Thermos with an axe edge.
âI call her âBig Suck.ââ
âI hate you,â Strange said.
âI love me.â
Then came the Incident. Danny got bored, which, to be clear, is always the beginning of the apocalypse. He found a cursed artifact that looked like a snow globe with a tiny screaming soul inside and thought, this seems fun.
It was not fun.
He broke it open trying to use it as a nightlight and released an ancient chaos entity named The Unfathomable Carl. Carl had a god complex, seventeen mouths, and a Twitter account within four minutes of escaping.
âHOW DID HE EVEN GET A PHONE?!â Strange screamed while fending off a barrage of cursed pigeons.
âHE FOLLOWED ME ON INSTAGRAM!â Danny shouted from behind a sofa.
It took three Avengers, a packet of Mentos, and Danny screaming âYOUâRE NOT EVEN THAT SCARY, CARL!â to trap him back in the snow globe. Clockwork appeared mid-chaos, sipping ecto-tea.
âThis was necessary for your growth,â he said calmly.
Danny hurled a shoe at him.
Eventually, Strange came to a horrifying realization: Danny wasnât learning magic in the traditional sense. He was absorbing it. He was like a sponge that had been dunked in eldritch Kool-Aid and now radiated unpredictable power every time he sneezed.
âDo not, under any circumstance, let him near the Time Stone,â Strange told Wong.
âHe already touched it.â
âWHAT?!â
âHe said it âsmelled like cosmic fruit roll-upâ and tried to lick it.â
âI HATE THIS CHILD.â
Danny was currently learning how to open a rift without screaming âYOLOâ at the top of his lungs. Progress wasâŚquestionable.
âDid you just use Ebonic incantation slang to fold space?â
Danny grinned. âMagic, but make it â¨feralâ¨.â
âYouâre going to give me an aneurysm.â
âI already gave Wong one.â
âYou whatâ?â
At some point, Nick Fury showed up, stared directly into Dannyâs glowing green eyes, and immediately called for backup.
âHeâs a threat to national security.â
âIâm seventeen!â
âYouâve destroyed seven timelines.â
âOkay but they were minor timelines! Who needs a universe made of talking cats, anyway?â
ââŚI did.â
Even the Watcher started side-eyeing Danny like a nervous babysitter. Carol Danvers tried to spar with him once and ended up in a ghost trap he made out of duct tape and ambition. âI respect you,â she told him from inside the glowing cube. âBut I hate you.â
âGet in line.â
By the time Danny hit six months of training, heâd accidentally absorbed a minor chaos god, reinvented ice magic as a form of dance-fighting, made friends with Mephisto (âHeâs not that bad once you get past the brimstoneâ), and turned his hair permanently silver-blue from temporal exposure.
Strange sat in his chair, robes scorched, tea long gone cold.
âWong,â he said softly. âI think the child is the apocalypse.â
Wong nodded solemnly. âAnd yetâŚI fear I love him.â
Danny phased through the wall with sunglasses and a churro. âHey! Want to help me prank Odin?â
Strange sighed like a man whose karma had caught up with him.
âIâll get the goat.â
And so it continued. Danny Phantom: Ghost Kid, Sorcerer-In-Training, Time-Space Menace, and unofficial emotional support chaos goblin of the multiverse. He may not have understood quantum geometry, astral projection, or taxesâbut damn it, he had style.
And, apparently, a date with the Living Tribunal next Tuesday.
âI hear heâs into jazz,â Danny said. âThink I should bring cookies?â
I have one of these and I keep it in my IT toolkit because that teeny little screwdriver is the right side for laptop casings, but because it lives inside a large object itâs harder to misplace than a standard tiny screwdriver. Also because the look on a clientâs face when you bring out a brass hammer to fix their laptop is absolutely wild.
Thoughts and Rants @rantingpirate - Tumblr Blog | Tumgag
