Amphetamines and Jellybeans

Hi, I'm Michael. 25, queer, yuppie millennial garbage.

[nadinelovesdinosaurs]

Remember that one time in an episode of The Suite Life of Zack and Cody when Bob said...

and you may or may not have realized that those were…

[lizthefangirl]

they don’t make em like this anymore

[romamilleniale]

But who is Irma?

[kinkydonuts]

[featherwurm]

A turtle-like merperson.

[oatsie-deactivated20180119]

Zelda, watching Link use the master sword to cut grass:

[mitski2020]

👑

[j-levi-deactivated20140629]

I just want to be muscular and walk around naked all the time.

[romamilleniale]

I just want to be muscular and walk around naked all the time.

[beachdeath]

Mark Hamill speaking to fans at Oxford Union. 

[shutyourmoustache]

Y’all, I ain’t never seen a whole Star Wars film, but Mark Hamill? Is an actual Fucking Saint™️.

[pursuit43]

Once again, <3 Mark Hamill

[commongayboy-deactivated2018082]

When you’re supposed to be acting straight at a family party but Beyoncé comes on and your parents can’t stop you

[dragmetohellmama]

If someone you know hasn’t seen drag race just show them this with no context

[amberleaf]

Edgar Allen Bitch

[kinsaleroadroundabout]

F. Thot Fitzgerald

[foxy-mulder-deactivated20190929]

Charles Dickens

[caffeinepunk-deactivated2019111]

[madisonbraden]

This photo should be on everyone’s blog at least once.

[mistressazariel]

I wish they would recreate this picture with how they are now 

[popurrigrafico]

V I O L E T   C H A C H K I   ( @VioletChachki )   Collage illustration

[365filmsbyauroranocte]

[eidolon-of-the-succ-deactivated]

smash bros (1999)

[daisy-duck-official]

IMPORTANT

attention all Officials, all Tumblr users, whoever the fuck you are.

This is severely important.

Ever sit down after a stressful day, watch your favorite youtuber, do commissions, etc.? Well in FOUR DAYS, that can all be taken away very easily. We’re so close yet so *far* from possibly saving the internet, and those who’s lives depend on it. Within this blog, there will be a link to a petition to stop net neutrality from being killed. There are many people who’s jobs are online. online schooling. the internet is extrememly important, and we can’t let the FCC take it away! Instead of just merely liking this post, sign the petition and reblog this post!

>> Here’s the link. <<

[ortensia-official]

GUYS!!

we are so close!!

yet so.. FAR!!

Once again, I beg of you, reblog this post! So many people’s lives are depending on this!

[daisy-duck-official]

Once again! I PLEAD you! Signal boost the fuck out of this! we need everyone to see it!!! We’re so close yet so FAR!!! If we don’t meet the goal in four/three days(?), then so many people will die and become depressed!!! STOP THE FCC AND SAVE THE INTERNET!

EVERY SIGN COUNTS!!

[ortensia-official]

DO IT

[rohanisnothere-deactivated20250]

DO IT YOU FOOLS! DO IT! @shirkerbx3 @inuyuru @highrollinggambler

[drbobbimorse]

1,378,400 ATM

[dirtyhippiie]

[coolsaddad-blog]

Roses are red, that much is true, but violets are purple, not fucking blue.

[feels-for-the-fictional]

I have been waiting for this post all my life.

[marzipanandminutiae]

They are indeed purple, But one thing you’ve missed: The concept of “purple” Didn’t always exist.

Some cultures lack names For a color, you see. Hence good old Homer And his “wine-dark sea.”

A usage so quaint, A phrasing so old, For verses of romance Is sheer fucking gold.

So roses are red. Violets once were called blue. I’m hugely pedantic But what else is new?

[ineptshieldmaid]

My friend you’re not wrong About Homer’s wine-ey sea! Colours are a matter Of cultural contingency;

Words are in flux And meanings they drift But the word purple You’ve given short shrift.

The concept of purple, My friends, is old And refers to a pigment once precious as gold.

By crushing up molluscs From the wine-dark sea You make a dye: Imperial decree

Meant that in Rome, to wear purpura was a privilege reserved

For only the emperor!

The word ‘purple’, for clothes so fancy, Entered English By the ninth century

.

Why then are voilets Not purple in song? The dye from this mollusc, known for so long

Is almost magenta; More red than blue. The concept of purple is old, and yet new.

The dye is red, So this might be true: Roses are purple And violets are blue

.

[squeeful]

While this song makes me merry, Tyrian purple dyes many a hue From magenta to berry And a true purple too.

But fun as it is to watch this poetic race The answer is staring you right in the face: Roses are red and violets are blue Because nothing fucking rhymes with purple.

[cryoverkiltmilk]

[young-il-long-kiyoshi]

IT GOT SO MUCH BETTER.

[farrentalon]

My reaction, only with coffee.

[thetiredpianist]

Hang on, need to send this to my literature prof

[demilypyro]

It’s interesting to me when someone dies and their Wikipedia page almost immediately becomes past tense. Who does that? Is that someone’s job? Is it the grim reaper?

[demilypyro]

I walk into the bank with an open laptop and tell them to give me all the money in the vault, or else I edit Bill Murray’s Wikipedia page. 12 SWAT guys come in and shoot me in the nuts when I ask the teller what the WiFi password is

[demilypyro]

sHIT