the best friend i'll never let you have

sideblog to be loud on. bpd. my thoughts are messy, unhealthy and bad. no more trigger warnings, sorry

[tiktoksthataregood-ish]

[3liza]

we are learning a lot about tumblr today

[sreegs]

today:

pjackk was unbanned because @3liza finally got through to staff about a fucking weird bug with the support form that got the metal bastard banned because it claimed he posted some Bulgarian nationalist shit (this was not a real post that pjackk ever posted). other high-profile bans like @garaks-padded-bra was hit with the same bug and its being investigated

there was a new feature added that lets people see your comments on your blog page in a tab like your likes or followers. everyone was mad that it was not toggle-able. it was actually toggle-able.

pjackk was either banned again or he deactivated and we'll know in 30 days when the deactivation grace period is up and his blog is renamed

[safely-overdosing]

reading this in a Scouse accent

[safely-overdosing]

not a single poly relationship has worked out so far. not a single one. and its really fucking funny

[wutheringheightsfilm]

every day it just concerns me how little compassion people have. no compassion for those living in the global south. no compassion for immigrants. no compassion for disabled ppl. no compassion for addicts. no compassion for prisoners. no compassion for children. like holy shit ...

[wutheringheightsfilm]

i made a separate post about this but actually there are plenty of people cough white people who care about animals more than they ever do human people . not what i'm talking about make your own post

[nourishedbytime]

[i-enact-postvore]

[safely-overdosing]

whitie leftists are utterly incapable of caring for more than one (1) thing at a time

[tsunflowers]

I started a new stardew save on a whim and kent is making me think of the poem "bluey in the genocide." like it's not that deep bc kent lives in a fantasy world and fights another fantasy race. but it still positions war as something that happens to other people elsewhere and the only ones affected are returning soldiers and their families. there might be one or two incidental lines about the war affecting supply chains? but overall being at war does not seem to affect the people of stardew valley. it's a neutral background event. and I think it's true to the reality of rural America that you will get a guy who fights in the army and comes back jumpy but it's something to examine in fiction

[tsunflowers]

I saw a post recently asking why you can't raise livestock for meat in stardew and I think that one's inherited from harvest moon but there are things new to stardew that just go unquestioned. I don't know that it's possible to make a truly neutral "cozy game" bc everyone brings their own baggage to their art. there's always something there that the creator hasn't noticed

[safely-overdosing]

oh i know this one! it's because producing meat is cruel and unnecessary

[safely-overdosing]

yea i didn't have mutual-falling-for-pro-russia-ukraine-is-the-actual-enemy-propaganda on my 2026 bingo card

[cowboy]

A girl can be a handsome fella. This is obvious

[safely-overdosing]

the weirdest thing is it's blatantly obvious that most of the kids i argue with on here are really just that. kids. literal 19yos and below

so once i realize that, i try not to be too hard on them. i usually never start out hard to begin with. But once i realize i'm fighting a middeschooler, i'm like "okay buddy. let me say a few things to set you up okay? let me have it" like a boxing coach

[persephoneme]

deeply funny to observe the post-hoc rationalizations of the tumblr userbase re: ai and veganism because if you follow the thread of the arguments you end up in this bizarre discursive space where water usage is a pressing environmental concern but if you gesture towards the meat industry about it you’re a shill for Big Quinoa. lol.

[safely-overdosing]

feels like we're approaching this wrong. we need to twist and revise veganism into some queer issue like "btw meat is transphobic" and everyone will recoil in apology

[angel-advise]

person who assumes maleness as default and refuses to interrogate this: yeah this character has no gender, they're just a little Guy

[safely-overdosing]

why does everyone need to make up problems. do you feel better now?

[junejasprose-addict]

Misgendering is not a made up problem. Masculinity being centered in so much of our language is not a made up problem.

[safely-overdosing]

except "guy" and "guys" have been used to refer to people and groups of any gender for long enough that it's no longer a masculine marker, and you *know* it isn't. "guy" has no inherent meaning, no word has inherent meaning. we give semantic meaning to words extrinsically, and if that's how we use it, that's how we use it

i'm not a frat bro type person like "lol don't be so offended", like i genuinely want yall to understand that language is what we make of it. a youtuber going "hey guys!" is addressing a group of people, and you *know* that's what they mean and what's being conveyed, because that's what it means. and from that point on, you can choose to be sad about some etymological "well ackshually" or you can choose not to. its literally up to you

[junejasprose-addict]

And why has our language shifted that way? Why are these masculine terms being used "gender neutrally" now?

For the same reason men's clothing gets called "unisex." Because of the patriarchal idea that male is default. Language does not change in a vacuum, guy did not spontaneously become gender neutral for no reason. Language is spoken by people, and people have biases and prejudices. It's changing because the majority of people don't put in effort to challenge the misogyny we are all drenched in, so anyone on the street = guy in their head. Masculinity is centralized in our language, and that's not harmless. It's yet another example of misogyny creeping into our lives. And this instance is really fucking easy to counteract. Just stop using guy and dude and bro "gender neutrally." Just put in an effort. It's not hard.

And we trans women have every fucking right to recognize this as misgendering when it's used on us. The maleness of these terms have not disappeared from your minds. You *know* the connection between "guys" and masculinity, and so do we. Maybe you can watch the way misogyny infects every fascet of our language and just be fine with that, but im disgusted by how inescapable it is.

[safely-overdosing]

my original point was that, by being a pure principalist, by going "this is masculine-coded, therefore unapplicable to all genders", youre really only making yourself miserable when it's really not that much of an issue in certain instances. some ways in which the patriarchy upholds masculinity as the default *are* bad and actively harmful. some just are not. i'm genuinely too old and sensitive to upset myself over these things anymore, and absolving yourself of this fight against windmills seems like it's the actual easy choice. because "guys" and "bro" and "dude" are going to stay and stick around, i'm sorry to tell you this is one of those things that some people are gonna be on one side of or the other, and you and me just won't get along in this regard and thats okay. it's not like i'm fighting proactively for people to say guys and dude, i'm not voting on it, its just how i choose to talk and address people. the same way that you're free to accept that terfs won't be your friend, neither will we

[junejasprose-addict]

some ways in which the patriarchy upholds masculinity as the default *are* bad and actively harmful. some just are not.

No??? No, there are not harmless ways the patriarchy upholds masculinity as the default. Its all bad. The means dont justify the ends just because those means aren't disruptive to you personally.

because "guys" and "bro" and "dude" are going to stay and stick around, i'm sorry to tell you

Yeah, because people like you fight tooth and nail to keep them around.

this is one of those things that some people are gonna be on one side of or the other, and you and me just won't get along in this regard and thats okay.

Or you could just agree with me because im right? And you seem to agree that im right, but its just too much effort to make very minor changes to your vocabulary so you're just gonna throw your hands up in defeat before even trying in the first place?

[safely-overdosing]

i mean here it is, you're just being principlist and equating every capillary of Thing Somehow Being Tangentially Related To Masculine Default to actual harmful patriarchical consequences. i literally told you i'm not proactively protesting for its use, but you *have* to paint me this way, because you *have* to be angry. because you *have* to stick to your principles come what may. it's no different than Christians arguing for univocality in the bible, you simply cannot make a case for it for every last instance

that was the whole point of my original comment

some things are just not as serious and harmful, and you absolutely can and should learn to differentiate between them, spending your time and energy on actual Things that are Things

[junejasprose-addict]

Are you even sentient

[safely-overdosing]

something something brainrot from being severely malnourished

[angel-advise]

person who assumes maleness as default and refuses to interrogate this: yeah this character has no gender, they're just a little Guy

[safely-overdosing]

why does everyone need to make up problems. do you feel better now?

[junejasprose-addict]

Misgendering is not a made up problem. Masculinity being centered in so much of our language is not a made up problem.

[safely-overdosing]

except "guy" and "guys" have been used to refer to people and groups of any gender for long enough that it's no longer a masculine marker, and you *know* it isn't. "guy" has no inherent meaning, no word has inherent meaning. we give semantic meaning to words extrinsically, and if that's how we use it, that's how we use it

i'm not a frat bro type person like "lol don't be so offended", like i genuinely want yall to understand that language is what we make of it. a youtuber going "hey guys!" is addressing a group of people, and you *know* that's what they mean and what's being conveyed, because that's what it means. and from that point on, you can choose to be sad about some etymological "well ackshually" or you can choose not to. its literally up to you

[junejasprose-addict]

And why has our language shifted that way? Why are these masculine terms being used "gender neutrally" now?

For the same reason men's clothing gets called "unisex." Because of the patriarchal idea that male is default. Language does not change in a vacuum, guy did not spontaneously become gender neutral for no reason. Language is spoken by people, and people have biases and prejudices. It's changing because the majority of people don't put in effort to challenge the misogyny we are all drenched in, so anyone on the street = guy in their head. Masculinity is centralized in our language, and that's not harmless. It's yet another example of misogyny creeping into our lives. And this instance is really fucking easy to counteract. Just stop using guy and dude and bro "gender neutrally." Just put in an effort. It's not hard.

And we trans women have every fucking right to recognize this as misgendering when it's used on us. The maleness of these terms have not disappeared from your minds. You *know* the connection between "guys" and masculinity, and so do we. Maybe you can watch the way misogyny infects every fascet of our language and just be fine with that, but im disgusted by how inescapable it is.

[safely-overdosing]

my original point was that, by being a pure principalist, by going "this is masculine-coded, therefore unapplicable to all genders", youre really only making yourself miserable when it's really not that much of an issue in certain instances. some ways in which the patriarchy upholds masculinity as the default *are* bad and actively harmful. some just are not. i'm genuinely too old and sensitive to upset myself over these things anymore, and absolving yourself of this fight against windmills seems like it's the actual easy choice. because "guys" and "bro" and "dude" are going to stay and stick around, i'm sorry to tell you this is one of those things that some people are gonna be on one side of or the other, and you and me just won't get along in this regard and thats okay. it's not like i'm fighting proactively for people to say guys and dude, i'm not voting on it, its just how i choose to talk and address people. the same way that you're free to accept that terfs won't be your friend, neither will we

[junejasprose-addict]

some ways in which the patriarchy upholds masculinity as the default *are* bad and actively harmful. some just are not.

No??? No, there are not harmless ways the patriarchy upholds masculinity as the default. Its all bad. The means dont justify the ends just because those means aren't disruptive to you personally.

because "guys" and "bro" and "dude" are going to stay and stick around, i'm sorry to tell you

Yeah, because people like you fight tooth and nail to keep them around.

this is one of those things that some people are gonna be on one side of or the other, and you and me just won't get along in this regard and thats okay.

Or you could just agree with me because im right? And you seem to agree that im right, but its just too much effort to make very minor changes to your vocabulary so you're just gonna throw your hands up in defeat before even trying in the first place?

[safely-overdosing]

i mean here it is, you're just being principlist and equating every capillary of Thing Somehow Being Tangentially Related To Masculine Default to actual harmful patriarchical consequences. i literally told you i'm not proactively protesting for its use, but you *have* to paint me this way, because you *have* to be angry. because you *have* to stick to your principles come what may. it's no different than Christians arguing for univocality in the bible, you simply cannot make a case for it for every last instance

that was the whole point of my original comment

some things are just not as serious and harmful, and you absolutely can and should learn to differentiate between them, spending your time and energy on actual Things that are Things

[silverswinds]

Oh, you have a wife? Tell me more about this guy that you married. Is this the first guy you've ever slept with? How many times have you had sex with a guy?

[safely-overdosing]

many times

[angel-advise]

person who assumes maleness as default and refuses to interrogate this: yeah this character has no gender, they're just a little Guy

[safely-overdosing]

why does everyone need to make up problems. do you feel better now?

[junejasprose-addict]

Misgendering is not a made up problem. Masculinity being centered in so much of our language is not a made up problem.

[safely-overdosing]

except "guy" and "guys" have been used to refer to people and groups of any gender for long enough that it's no longer a masculine marker, and you *know* it isn't. "guy" has no inherent meaning, no word has inherent meaning. we give semantic meaning to words extrinsically, and if that's how we use it, that's how we use it

i'm not a frat bro type person like "lol don't be so offended", like i genuinely want yall to understand that language is what we make of it. a youtuber going "hey guys!" is addressing a group of people, and you *know* that's what they mean and what's being conveyed, because that's what it means. and from that point on, you can choose to be sad about some etymological "well ackshually" or you can choose not to. its literally up to you

[junejasprose-addict]

And why has our language shifted that way? Why are these masculine terms being used "gender neutrally" now?

For the same reason men's clothing gets called "unisex." Because of the patriarchal idea that male is default. Language does not change in a vacuum, guy did not spontaneously become gender neutral for no reason. Language is spoken by people, and people have biases and prejudices. It's changing because the majority of people don't put in effort to challenge the misogyny we are all drenched in, so anyone on the street = guy in their head. Masculinity is centralized in our language, and that's not harmless. It's yet another example of misogyny creeping into our lives. And this instance is really fucking easy to counteract. Just stop using guy and dude and bro "gender neutrally." Just put in an effort. It's not hard.

And we trans women have every fucking right to recognize this as misgendering when it's used on us. The maleness of these terms have not disappeared from your minds. You *know* the connection between "guys" and masculinity, and so do we. Maybe you can watch the way misogyny infects every fascet of our language and just be fine with that, but im disgusted by how inescapable it is.

[safely-overdosing]

my original point was that, by being a pure principalist, by going "this is masculine-coded, therefore unapplicable to all genders", youre really only making yourself miserable when it's really not that much of an issue in certain instances. some ways in which the patriarchy upholds masculinity as the default *are* bad and actively harmful. some just are not. i'm genuinely too old and sensitive to upset myself over these things anymore, and absolving yourself of this fight against windmills seems like it's the actual easy choice. because "guys" and "bro" and "dude" are going to stay and stick around, i'm sorry to tell you this is one of those things that some people are gonna be on one side of or the other, and you and me just won't get along in this regard and thats okay. it's not like i'm fighting proactively for people to say guys and dude, i'm not voting on it, its just how i choose to talk and address people. the same way that you're free to accept that terfs won't be your friend, neither will we

[junejasprose-addict]

some ways in which the patriarchy upholds masculinity as the default *are* bad and actively harmful. some just are not.

No??? No, there are not harmless ways the patriarchy upholds masculinity as the default. Its all bad. The means dont justify the ends just because those means aren't disruptive to you personally.

because "guys" and "bro" and "dude" are going to stay and stick around, i'm sorry to tell you

Yeah, because people like you fight tooth and nail to keep them around.

this is one of those things that some people are gonna be on one side of or the other, and you and me just won't get along in this regard and thats okay.

Or you could just agree with me because im right? And you seem to agree that im right, but its just too much effort to make very minor changes to your vocabulary so you're just gonna throw your hands up in defeat before even trying in the first place?

[safely-overdosing]

i mean here it is, you're just being principlist and equating every capillary of Thing Somehow Being Tangentially Related To Masculine Default to actual harmful patriarchical consequences. i literally told you i'm not proactively protesting for its use, but you *have* to paint me this way, because you *have* to be angry. because you *have* to stick to your principles come what may. it's no different than Christians arguing for univocality in the bible, you simply cannot make a case for it for every last instance

that was the whole point of my original comment

some things are just not as serious and harmful, and you absolutely can and should learn to differentiate between them, spending your time and energy on actual Things that are Things

[angel-advise]

person who assumes maleness as default and refuses to interrogate this: yeah this character has no gender, they're just a little Guy

[safely-overdosing]

why does everyone need to make up problems. do you feel better now?

[junejasprose-addict]

Misgendering is not a made up problem. Masculinity being centered in so much of our language is not a made up problem.

[safely-overdosing]

except "guy" and "guys" have been used to refer to people and groups of any gender for long enough that it's no longer a masculine marker, and you *know* it isn't. "guy" has no inherent meaning, no word has inherent meaning. we give semantic meaning to words extrinsically, and if that's how we use it, that's how we use it

i'm not a frat bro type person like "lol don't be so offended", like i genuinely want yall to understand that language is what we make of it. a youtuber going "hey guys!" is addressing a group of people, and you *know* that's what they mean and what's being conveyed, because that's what it means. and from that point on, you can choose to be sad about some etymological "well ackshually" or you can choose not to. its literally up to you

[junejasprose-addict]

And why has our language shifted that way? Why are these masculine terms being used "gender neutrally" now?

For the same reason men's clothing gets called "unisex." Because of the patriarchal idea that male is default. Language does not change in a vacuum, guy did not spontaneously become gender neutral for no reason. Language is spoken by people, and people have biases and prejudices. It's changing because the majority of people don't put in effort to challenge the misogyny we are all drenched in, so anyone on the street = guy in their head. Masculinity is centralized in our language, and that's not harmless. It's yet another example of misogyny creeping into our lives. And this instance is really fucking easy to counteract. Just stop using guy and dude and bro "gender neutrally." Just put in an effort. It's not hard.

And we trans women have every fucking right to recognize this as misgendering when it's used on us. The maleness of these terms have not disappeared from your minds. You *know* the connection between "guys" and masculinity, and so do we. Maybe you can watch the way misogyny infects every fascet of our language and just be fine with that, but im disgusted by how inescapable it is.

[safely-overdosing]

my original point was that, by being a pure principalist, by going "this is masculine-coded, therefore unapplicable to all genders", youre really only making yourself miserable when it's really not that much of an issue in certain instances. some ways in which the patriarchy upholds masculinity as the default *are* bad and actively harmful. some just are not. i'm genuinely too old and sensitive to upset myself over these things anymore, and absolving yourself of this fight against windmills seems like it's the actual easy choice. because "guys" and "bro" and "dude" are going to stay and stick around, i'm sorry to tell you this is one of those things that some people are gonna be on one side of or the other, and you and me just won't get along in this regard and thats okay. it's not like i'm fighting proactively for people to say guys and dude, i'm not voting on it, its just how i choose to talk and address people. the same way that you're free to accept that terfs won't be your friend, neither will we

[angel-advise]

person who assumes maleness as default and refuses to interrogate this: yeah this character has no gender, they're just a little Guy

[safely-overdosing]

why does everyone need to make up problems. do you feel better now?

[junejasprose-addict]

Misgendering is not a made up problem. Masculinity being centered in so much of our language is not a made up problem.

[safely-overdosing]

except "guy" and "guys" have been used to refer to people and groups of any gender for long enough that it's no longer a masculine marker, and you *know* it isn't. "guy" has no inherent meaning, no word has inherent meaning. we give semantic meaning to words extrinsically, and if that's how we use it, that's how we use it

i'm not a frat bro type person like "lol don't be so offended", like i genuinely want yall to understand that language is what we make of it. a youtuber going "hey guys!" is addressing a group of people, and you *know* that's what they mean and what's being conveyed, because that's what it means. and from that point on, you can choose to be sad about some etymological "well ackshually" or you can choose not to. its literally up to you

[queersona]

ooooojhhh i hate how Europeans think they're not just as racist as USAmericans, they have such a holier-than-thou attitude about it all. As if they don't have such harsh views about the Romani people. Or just as racist views against immigration as the US. Or a staunch hatred against Muslims. Or even a weird hatred against white Mediterraneans who are just a liiitttle tanner than an someone in Norway or some shit

[stressedkillifish]

you talk generally about anything remotely facist or racist and everyone is immediately like "yeah America is so scary! Trump is so dumb lol" NO stop it!! The UK government and news outlets are villanising and removing rights from disabled people DAILY. You post anything remotely close to complaining on your towns local Facebook page and at least half the comments will be talking about immigrants like they single handedly carved every pothole into our roads.

like yes America has big scary issues but as someone living in not America I'm fucking sick of everyone talking about it because it feels like we're using it to ignore our own decline.

[safely-overdosing]

i generally agree but i find it really funny how you brought up the UK, like thats the one place that's not even europe anymore lmao

[tiktoks-i-enjoyed]

[safely-overdosing]

theyre both cringe as fuck

[safely-overdosing]

checked tumblr to read some absolute bullshit again

well see y'all tomorrow