resident rhamphorhynchus

💜 25+ 💜 she/her 💜 minors: this is no place of honor, shoo! 💜 for OG content see: #salmondraws - # salmonWIP - #salmoncamera - #salmoncrafts 💜 PFP and header by Bill 💜

[orcflorist]

every now and then, there are orcs

[orcflorist]

if you see this post you are legally obligated to imagine an modern orc staring at their computer screen half scrolling tumblr and half watching hell's kitchen after drinking a bottle of wine

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

always some new bullshit in the ocean

[local-demon-in-your-area]

Why is it always orcas or dolphins

Why can't a salmon do some bullshit for once

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

worry not ☝️ they're doing coke

[tropiyas]

weaponized competence

[tropiyas]

learned helpfulness

[slowpokegamer]

*looking at myself in the mirror*

Fanfiction is supposed to be cringy. You're allowed to write bad. You're allowed to be cringe. Fanfiction is supposed to be self indulgent. You're allowed to be cringe. Let yourself be cringe. Fanfiction is supposed to be fun. Stop putting arbitrary rules on yourself and be free.

[redstonedust]

the problem with movie remakes is that they always remake something that was already good, meaning at worst you ruin it and at best your remake is largely redundant. to make a truly good remake you need to start with source material that is absolute dogwater. ignore the pull of nostalgia. redeem the sins of moviemaking past.

[blessphemy]

this is how morbius can still win

[dogpuppy]

[beemovieerotica]

[salmon-slam]

i'm so fucking tired but can't sleep

[salmon-slam]

the horrors...

[11thfempachi]

Girls just wanna have fun

[themysteriousmurasamecastle]

been repeating this in my head all day

[borange]

honest to god fill my uterus with these, how many will fit? how many until its noticeable? lets make a game out of it! get them big ass balls into me

[02nd]

hi

[2urban2fantasy-deactivated20241]

You should all be beaten like piñatas

[benihana-circumcision]

dont do that bro the fucking boba r gonna shoot out

[benihana-circumcision]

just fucking imagine the noise . the fucking Schfpblort.

[garaks-padded-cell]

when your dog looks back at you on a walk like heh... we are really walking right now man

[smeefy-smoofy]

[garaks-padded-cell]

Youll pay for erasing her role in this story

[tpwrtrmnky]

The idea of Mario and Peach having any kind of relationship beyond the occasional kiss on the nose and "mama mia" is like viscerally incomprehensible to me

Not like in a prude way I just can't conceive of Mario experiencing... urges. He's a character outside the scope of that. I'm not saying he's asexual either cause positioning him on the allo/ace spectrum implies that it's a dimension of his character that at least exists, that he has at some point noticed it. I think he just jumps.

[tpwrtrmnky]

Luigi probably fucks though.

[tpwrtrmnky]

#op interrogate yourself about why you think this right fucking now

So unlike Mario, who continues to be essentially a void with no internality, I actually act with thoughts and intent and already did do that when writing this post.

Mario is a mascot of one of the most sanitized corporate brands in existence. He differs from real, full-fledged ace people in that his sexlessness is not queer, not transgressive in any sense of the word, just a void left by his position as a player character. He has no queer identity because he has no identity beyond the fact that it's-a-him, Mario.

[antigyro]

Ok but why is Luigi different

[tpwrtrmnky]

displays internality by being capable of fear. to fear is to have something to lose. and what does he stand to lose? fucking.

[terra-nightgale]

OMG I CAN HAZ TUMBLR

so yea, i made a blog and now i need to post stuff XD

[flareonfloof]

omg finally

[terra-nightgale]

i’m going to blow up everything forever.

[emilybeemartin]

Boromir Lives AU: Braiding Customs

Using the popular braiding-customs trope for my own nefarious purposes [putting two principled men with ptsd into Situations]

Part II

Part III

Part IV

---------------

Boromir Lives: Helm's Deep

Boromir Lives: Whump-Time After Pelennor

Boromir Lives: GO TO SLEEP

Boromir Lives: Aragorn's Coronation

Boromir Lives: Faramir and Eowyn's Wedding

Boromir Lives: Panic! At the Ballroom

Boromir Lives: It's a BABY

Boromir Lives: High Uncle of the White Tower

Boromir Lives: We Didn't Have a Choice

Boromir Lives: The Haircuts

[kikmessenger]

sits on my own blog like it’s the edge of a lake wistfully

[kikmessenger]

skips a stone over a few posts

[kerizaret]

Overheard in a manga store yesterday: "we need more yuri in here. I've had at least 5 girls coming up to me last time asking for yuri. Everyone wants yuri now". The world is healing