tired and distant

32 and still ded

[noshadeintheshadowofthecross]

posts on here are like ‘everyone at the farmers market wishes to know me carnally’ (25,000 notes)

[milf-adjacent]

Everyone at the farmers market wishes to know me carnally

[firstgrave]

anyways tbh im actually pretty tired of “harmless” jokes against polyam people/relationships because it’s literally the same shit said about bisexual people and typically ends up directed towards bisexual people.

like ofc the women involved are completely stripped of their autonomy and are clearly only doing it for the attention of guys. they have no say in the matter and are simply brainwashed by their partner to do whatever they want like a lapdog. OR if the woman does dare to take actual pleasure in their own relationship and identity, they’re “tainting” the purity of actual relationships and are really sex-crazed sluts.

and the men involved are all predators who are trying to appear less dangerous to trick women into doing whatever they want. it’s all about their own sexual gratification and they are actually just emotionless fuck dolls

AND regardless of gender, they’re all painted as dirty, sexual deviants.

and ofc when people point this out, the ones making the jokes always go “oh well ofc I was only talking abt the ugly cishets who do it” even tho their post was directed at “polyam people” in general. just like the people who make ugly jokes about “m/f relationships” and then act shocked when bi/trans people who are in m/f relationships ask for clarification.

and no im not trying to say all polyam people are bisexual or all bisexual people are polyam or being polyam automatically makes someone lgbt. but like you guys constantly act like there isn’t a historical connection b/w the bi community and the polyam community when there is, and you justify your shittyness towards bi polyam people by denying your own biphobia.

[mystupiddumbflyboy]

jack & han parallels

[dankmemesreasonforliving]

[yesterdaysprint]

The Ogden Standard-Examiner, Utah, April 14, 1925

[allofthemwitches-deactivated202]

omfg why

[justsomeguycore]

100+ black-owned wellness & beauty businesses to shop from instead

[starlitshores]

BOYCOTT LUSH UK!

DO NOT BOYCOTT LUSH NORTH AMERICA!

Lush UK and Lush North America are different!

Lush UK is owned by Mark Constantine, the guy supporting cops.

Lush North America is owned by Mark Wolverton and Karen Delaney-Wolverton and they support Black Lives Matter. This is their Twitter which is full of BLM content and info about allyship, etc. right now.

This is their homepage:

They sent out this letter to their employees and posted it online:

Credit to @sapphiredoves​ on Twitter.

[llatimeria]

Please buy this game bundle. It’s $5 (or more if you want) for literally 700 video games, tabletop games, not to mention game engines and assets. All proceeds are going to the NAACP and Community Bail Fund, split 50/50.

Night in the Woods and Oneshot are both in it, not to mention literally hundreds of other cool indie games I haven’t played yet that look really cool and promising. 

Also I’d like to reiterate it is $5 minimum for over $3,400 worth of content, which is just fucking insane.

[catgirlforeskin]

There’s tons of amazing stuff in this, really you should be donating anyway but this such a steal to get all this incredibly art for so cheap

[everythingfromglass]

I made a meme.

[fossilizedmiku-deactivated20260]

OH THERES MUMMY (1998) MEMES NOW

[twin-fox]

Someone put red paint on the "Serve and Protect" sculpture at the Salt Lake City police building and it is such a powerful statement.

"Good art should disturb the comfortable and comfort the disturbed." -C.A.C.

[lespenseesdepandee]

STARGATE ATLANTIS - Episode 2x19

[bedbugbiting]

My face is having uncontrollable spasms. Great. It hurts really, really, really bad.

I think part of why I have trouble explaining pain to the doctor is when they ask about the pain scale I always think “Well, if someone threw me down a flight of stairs right now or punched me a few times, it would definitely hurt a lot more” so I end up saying a low number. I was reading an article that said that “10” is the most commonly reported number and that is baffling to me. When I woke up from surgery with an 8" incision in my body and I could hardly even speak, I was in the most horrific pain of my life but I said “6” because I thought “Well, if you hit me in the stomach, it would be worse.”

[bomberqueen17]

I searched and searched for the post this graphic was from, and the OP deactivated, but I kept the graphic, because my BFF does the same thing, uses her imagination to come up with the worst pain she can imagine and pegs her “10″ there, and so is like, well, I’m conscious, so this must be a 5, and then the doctors don’t take her seriously. (And she then does things like driving herself to the hospital while in the process of giving birth. Probably should have called an ambulance for that one!)

So I found this and sent it to her. Because this is what they want to know: how badly is this pain affecting you? Not on a scale of “nothing” to “how I’d imagine it’d feel if bears were eating my still-living guts while I was on fire”. 

I hate reposting stuff, but I’ll never find that post again and OP is deactivated, so, here’s a repost. I can delete this later, i just wanted to get it to you and I can’t embed images in a chat or an ask. 

[derryderrydown]

This is possibly why it took several weeks to diagnose my fractured spine.

[petralemaitre]

Pain Scale transcription:

10 - I am in bed and I can’t move due to my pain. I need someone to take me to the emergency room because of my pain.

9 - My pain is all that I can think about. I can barely move or talk because of my pain.

8 - My pain is so severe that it is difficult to think of anything else. Talking and listening are difficult.

7 - I am in pain all the time. It keeps me from doing most activities.

6 - I think about my pain all of the time. I give up many activities because of my pain.

5 - I think about my pain most of the time. I cannot do some of the activities I need to do each day because of the pain.

4 - I am constantly aware of my pain but can continue most activities.

3 - My pain bothers me but I can ignore it most of the time.

2 - I have a low level of pain. I am aware of my pain only when I pay attention to it.

1 - My pain is hardly noticeable.

0 - I have no pain.

[airagorncharda]

It’s also really important to get this kind of scale to people who have chronic pain, because chronic pain drastically lowers your perception of how “bad” any kind of pain actually is, and yet something like this pain scale is extremely user friendly. 

For example, if someone asked me how much pain I’m in at any given time, I’d say hardly any, and yet I’m apparently at a chronic 2.5, and it only goes up from there depending on the day. 

There’s also a similarly useful “Fatigue Scale”

[jedijenkins]

I haven’t been below a 5 on this scale for 4 years 

[nerdgasrnz]

Here’s the fatigue scale

[sunny-day-sky]

Fatigue scale image desc:

10: can barely move; can’t talk

9: can barely move; can talk

8: can move, but can’t do much more than watch TV

7: can watch TV and play a game on my phone simultaneously

6: can do work on my computer lying in bed

5: can get around the house, but definitely couldn’t go out

4: can run a light errand

3: can get in my 10,000 steps, making my fitbit happy

2: can do three or more activities in a single day

1: going clubbing!

[eruvadhril]

See also the Mental Health Pain Scale by Graceful Patient:

Mental Health Pain Scale transcription:

MILD

1 - Everything is a-okay! There is absolutely nothing wrong. You’re probably cuddling a fluffy kitten right now. Enjoy!

2 - You’re a bit frustrated or disappointed, but you’re easily distracted and cheered up with a little effort.

3 - Things are bothering you, but you’re coping. You might be overtired or hungry. The emotional equivalent of a headache.

MODERATE

4 - Today is a bad day (or a few bad days). You still have the skills to get through it, but be gentle with yourself. Use self-care strategies.

5 - Your mental health is starting to impact on your everyday life. Easy things are becoming difficult. You should talk to your doctor.

6 - You can’t do things the way you usually do them due to your mental health. Impulsive and compulsive thoughts may be hard to cope with.

SEVERE

7 - You’re avoiding things that make you more distressed, but that will make it worse. You should definitely seek help. This is serious.

8 - You can’t hide your struggles any more. You may have issues sleeping, eating, having fun, socialising, and work/study. Your mental health is affecting almost all parts of your life.

9 - You’re at a critical point. You aren’t functioning any more. You need urgent help. You may be a risk to yourself or others if left untreated.

10 - The worst mental and emotional distress possible. You can no longer care for yourself. You can’t imagine things getting any worse. Contact a crisis line immediately.

[kingspadedying]

These are so important! SO SO IMPORTANT SHARE THIS AND SAVE IT TO SHOW YOUR DOCTORS!

[mrswhozeewhatsis]

This is the first time I’ve seen the fatigue scale, and HOLY MOLY that’s a revelation!!! These should be on all hospital and doctor office walls.

[ciaran2020]

Samuel Vines Boots theory of emotional labor and boundaries

[ciaran2020]

for those who don’t know, the theory is this: if you’re poor, you can only afford 10$ boots. these cheap boots last for a short time, and have to be replaced once a year. but if you’re rich, you can afford 50$ boots, and you only have to replace them once in ten years. so in ten years, the poor person spends double as much as the rich person spent.

imagine you have a relationship in which you struggle to set a boundary. you reason to yourself that the emotional cost of having that conversation is more than the emotional safety gained from having that boundary respected. but the longer you’re friends with that person, the more emotional tax you pay from having your boundaries trodden over, and at some point you realize you’ve paid far more than you would have if you’d just set the damn boundary in the first place.

[wetwareproblem]

This is so, so important, but just to help make the core point clear: If setting a boundary is more work than not setting it, run. That person is not safe.

[swarnpert]

cut my pants into pieces/this is my pair of jorts

[i-want-it-on-fire]

I made another quiz, and this one is extremely niche, not gonna lie.

[i-want-it-on-fire]

Which of White Star Line’s three Olympic-class ocean liners are you?

[sunnydaze-d]

[samfosho]

This is distressingly on brand

[saltwasteland]

honestly a mood

[mabeltanaka]

a few great out-of-context moments from Middleditch & Schwartz on Netflix

[captainsnoop-deactivated2020041]

theres something very funny about people writing these rich and detailed backstories for dnd characters as if the characters aren’t gonna still be level 1 when they start 

“my elf has been alive for a thousand years and has won ten thousand battles!!!” you’re still level 1 aint ya i guess you those ten thousand battles you won werent all that hard to win 

[captainsnoop-deactivated2020041]

i know this sounds all grumpy but i legit mean it when i say it is hilarious when someone writes it in to their backstory that they were the Smartest Mage on the Planet that has researched magic for A Thousand Centuries and then the game starts and they’re like “yeah i know fireball whats up” 

[captainsnoop-deactivated2020041]

the more detailed your character’s backstory is and the more you boast about the character’s competence and abilities, the funnier it becomes when you roll a 1 and your character just drops their sword and shits themselves. president of the dwarves for six centuries and you just shit yourself in a bar you were trying to find work in.  

[drtanner]

Like I know that this is a Goof Post™ and that you’re generally not supposed to try to offer any explanations for stuff like this for fear of Ruining The Joke™ but I feel like people do this because they fundamentally misunderstand what their character’s backstory is actually for.

The most interesting and compelling part of a character’s life is supposed to be the story you’re going to tell; you’re defeating the object by shoving all of the cool shit into their backstory. The actual purpose of the backstory is to inform your character’s behaviour and choices and the way they react to things so you can play/write them consistently! A solid backstory is a great way to make your character a whole person with a personality that makes sense.

tl;dr - A “cool” backstory doesn’t necessarily make for a cool character. It’s less about who they’ve been and what they’ve already done than it is about who they might become over the course of the story you’re going to tell with them.

[dndaddyissues]

hey! this! this is really really good advice for players!

[tyrantosaurus]

Though also if you’re playing a long lived species, it is entertaining as hell to explain why they haven’t done anything in their life worthwhile. It’s also funny to explain how they did all these incredible things and still can barely hold a sword.

My paladin was a folk hero. Fought off bandits and saved a town. One of the first campaign battles, she rolled a one and yeeted her sword across the room.

Cue her going very red and stammering about how she was usually more proficient than this but you know. She had hurt her arm. And slept weird last night. You know. Perfectly reasonable explanations for not knowing how to swing a sword.

So I guess my advice for new players is to make whatever backstory you want. If you were epic beforehand and want to grow as a character still? Lean into it. Explain why they’re at level one. Did they land in a coma for a year, and their muscles atrophied? Did a wizard cast a spell on them? Did they just fall off their horse and hit their head really hard?

Anything is possible. And there are ways to do it serious and gritty if you want- say they took a serious blow protecting a loved one or even just an ally, but corrupt energy in the wound prevented magical healing and it didn’t heal right. They have to relearn everything left handed because they lost their right. The whack on the head was by an enemy attacking their group and they only survived because they passed out and the enemy thought they were dead. They have constant splitting migraines that make it hard to focus. There are so many ways to explain why they’re back down to level one.

And any answer is fun. Even if that answer is just “things are easier where I’m from.”

Play with it. Make a character you want to play. No matter who that is.

(My paladin, for reference, got arrested for stealing food when she was starving and lost her skills while she was in solitary confinement for 60 years.)

[dndaddyissues]