one jump ahead

PRINCESS SAWYER OF AGRABAH. The youngest student body council president in history (Adam, if you plan on digging out books that are hundreds of years old to prove me wrong, please don't, I really enjoy just having this one). Raz's sister. Daughter of Queen Gwen and Queen Zoe. NOT a tiger mom or a monkey mom, but thank you for asking.

[razsterpiece-blog]

[sawyerofagrabah]

amadeusradcliffe:

You know what they say, the people in charge face the most backlash - or maybe they don’t say that, but it’s true, and they should say it! Do you think people really change that much from when they’re our age to, well, when they’re our parents’s age? Because from the sound of the stories, my parents are pretty much the same - maybe all that changes when you get older and in charge of more is, you know, being able to control yourself better, which doesn’t sound like a bad thing. Oh, I wouldn’t worry about that, See-Saw. It’s just Hurricane who says that and everyone knows to just laugh at most of what he says. Like he’s one to talk, anyway. Always talking about girls, always single. I like the name Stephen! I would’ve gladly been Stephen Amadeus, but I guess just Amadeus isn’t too bad either. Way better than Fabio which you’re never meant to tell anyone, ever! I don’t know, it’s kind of weird to think I’ve never heard your middle name, but it could sound cool with the whole title thing. Like, if you were named after your mom, Princess Sawyer Zoesephine of Agrabah! …Zoe isn’t short for Zoespehine, is it?

I don’t know; I think they might? Their basic personality traits and priorities might stay the same, but the way they look at the world changes because they experience more and open up more to possibilities. At least, I think so; it’s hard to imagine never being more than I am right now, I want to grow and evolve and learn more and be better before I’m a queen. Oh! Well, nevermind, I do feel better, then. I mean, Hurricane is... sweet, in his own odd way, but I definitely take his opinion with a grain of salt. Sorry, Hurricane, if you’re reading this! I’ll keep Fabio in confidence, unless, of course, some poor girl is madly in love with you and you don’t return her feelings in the slightest, in which case I might let it slip to her in the hopes of it scaring her away or letting her down gently. I think Zoe’s just short for Zoe -- I know that short names sometimes seem like there should be more to them, but for three letters it packs a two syllable punch, it’s quite impressive. Gwen’s actually shorter -- and also isn’t short for Gwennifer, in case you were about to ask that, too.

[sawyerofagrabah]

razsterpiece:

I’ll say! That’s what happens when your president is a jock, people! I hope that kind of negligence for the arts doesn’t continue when he’s king; if the king’s budget goes towards stadiums and not opera houses, what kind of people will we become? In other words, I’d love to work with you on that, Saw, fundraising programs and budgeting alike! Your help brainstorming would be ideal because all I can think of is a bikini-car-wash that I really, really wouldn’t be able to help with much. Excuse me, your aspirations are just as lofty, future Queen of our kingdom! I’m young, this is the time that my criteria gets to be misguded, obviously! Until I get older and meet the girl that’s nothing like I expected but sweeps me off my feet, like in all the shows! I’m not stressing about it until it happens. It’s way worse coming from you than it is from the moms! The moms have at least had sex, getting the birds and the bees talk from my virgin of a sister? EH.

I’m sure you and Margarita will give him heck about it until he makes sure to take good care of the arts, too, Razoul, you needn’t worry. And if you want, I can attempt to be a little bird whispering in his ear, though I’m not sure how much weight my opinion will hold when the day of his coronation comes and beyond. You could always parade around shirtless as well, though a bikini car wash seems dangerously close to stepping on the toes of cheerleaders. That seems to be one of their favorite fundraising technique, like how the concert band attempts to sell CDs every year and the dance girls bake cupcakes. Yes, but you seem more interested in pursuing romance soon than I am, so your misguided criteria are hindering your life more than mine might be. But we’re virgins together, we’re both trying to sort through the information and figure out what to make of it. Moms you have to realize they’re DOING the things they’re describing and that’s a traumatizing mental image!

[sawyerofagrabah]

auradonsadam:

And on this day, I, Prince Adam of the Realm of Auradon, Older Sibling and Heir to the throne of our good kingdom Auradon, Former Study Body President and Tourney Captain of Auradon Prepatory School and Current Pledge to the Alpha Omega Chi Fraternity of History Island University, hereby thank Princess Sawyer for her kindness and - hopefully - intelligently placed faith in me. 

And humbly request that we meet up to come up with more additions to our titles. I really think we could get them up to a proper length to challenge Daenerys Targaryen, First of Her Name, Queen of the Andals, the Rhoynar, and the First Men, Lady of the Seven Kingdoms, Protector of the Realm, Lady Paramount of the Crownlands, Princess of Dragonstone, Queen of Meereen, and Khaleesi of the Great Green Sea if we keep at it. Whenever you’re not busy making our school a better place, I mean.

Well, you’ll be quite glad to know that Auradon Prep is willing to spare my time sometimes -- in fact, to the point that they’ve locked me out of the student body meeting room when it gets too late, telling me that the school is closing and I need to go home. They say I can continue working if I want to, but I can’t work there, can you believe it? Of course you can believe it, I’m sure the same thing has probably happened to you before, too. Anyway! I’d love to help work on my Daenerys-like title, but I have an important question for you: does it come with dragons? I’m not sure I’m ready to be Mother of Dragons... or to forgive you for leaving that one out, come to think of it!

[sawyerofagrabah]

razsterpiece:

Um, thanks! I love you, I love you, I love you, and I totally owe you the next time you want to do something that’s your idea of fun at our place, too. And I know you totally don’t need help creating your high school legacy, but if you ever need anything, you know where I live. Ah, but a senior who doesn’t have a date is more likely to be desperate enough to take a tenth grader, there’s a method to my madness! It’s not a boy! For the last time, I don’t like boys like that - I mean, some guys are hot and all that, but not in the causing-butterflies way. It just means I haven’t found a girl that I like as more than a friend yet, that’s all, and maybe that’s because I’m so focused on my career, but that’ isn’t a bad thing, it just means I’ll find a girl with similar interests someday, right? You may be Agrabah’s queen, but I am the drama king! But for the record, me ewing that much is soooo not dramatics, it’s the exact amount of ews needed when my sister starts trying to talk to me about the birds and the bees!

Well, I mean -- Adam did leave a bit of a deficiency in the budget for the arts, so we could work together on that? I want to reallocate more of our funds towards that since I know it’s important, but we also might need to do some kind of fundraiser so we can boost arts support without having to dramatically cut it from others so fast that it throws off their programs, too. If you say so! I never would have dreamed of a senior asking me to prom, though; you have very high aspirations, little brother. If you’re sure! But if you ever change your mind you know you won’t get any judgment from us. You’ve already found a girl with THE MOST similar interests and you don’t like her, silly, so maybe your misguided criteria are why it’s taking you so long. Is it worse coming from me than from moms, though? Is it really?

[auradonsadam]

👀 do you think you're going to be a good king of auradon?

I do, actually. That’s not cocky to say when it’s true, right? Because I feel pretty confident in my abilities to lead. I know the kingdom like the back of my hand, I care about the people and can talk to them and have them talk to me, and I can’t imagine ever doing anything else. 

[sawyerofagrabah]

On this day, the seventeenth day of April in the year 2017, I, Princess Sawyer of Agrabah, Older Sibling and Heir to the Agrabah Throne, and Student Body President of Auradon Preparatory School, hereby second the motion that Prince Adam of the Realm of Auradon will make an excellent king someday.

[sawyerofagrabah]

amadeusradcliffe:

It’s cool, I would’ve taken the lecture like a champ. Your lectures are always on point and besides, it would’ve been good practice for you if you ever did need to give some weird homophobe a lecture like that. I don’t need adoring piano fangirls, but I wouldn’t hate that, either….and holy heck, See-Saw, that’s a brilliant idea! Anyone who says you have zero game is totally wrong, wow! Fabio sounds like some weird dude who wears all black and does poety slams and snaps instead of claps to me, actually, but…thanks. I’m just glad they named me Amadeus Fabio and not Fabio Amadeus becasue I’d never pull that name off, you know? I don’t think I know your middle name now that I thnk of it…

I really hope I don’t encounter too many of those in my future, but ruling a kingdom, I guess it’s bound to happen. Moms do a good job hiding it from us, although I feel like that’s taken a lot of practice since one of them loves to fly off the handle when people question her beliefs, or at least apparently used to. Wait, people say I have zero game? Who says that? Why? No way, the person you just described sounds way more like a Leon to me. Or maybe even a Stephen. Fabio sounds like he’d... okay, like maybe he’d be a clown, but still! You’d have to go by your middle name for sure, I might laugh everytime I saw you if you went by Fabio. Does my middle name really matter when I’m in line for a throne? Everyone just calls me ‘Sawyer of Agrabah’ as if ‘of’ is my middle name.

[sawyerofagrabah]

razsterpiece:

A cast party at Agrabah? I love that! We have such a kickin place, especially now before it gets too hot - and we haven’t thrown a party that isn’t a birthday party, not really, it’d be awesome! If you’re cool with it, I’d actually really love to give that cast-party-my-way plan a whirl, and since you suggested it, I’m going to assume you’re cool with it and call you the best sister in the world and send you a billion air hugs. Fiiiiine, I’ll wait my turn and earn my way to the carrot - or find some senior to take me, one way or the other. First of all, guys my age do love girls but that doesn’t mean we love all girls the same way and Margarita? Is firmly friend-zoned, it’d be too difficult for our careers otherwise. Second of all, just because you ewed first doesn’t mean I can’t also ew, because I’m ewing anyway. All day, erryday, ew ew ew ew ew.

Ninth grade was our acclimating year; tenth grade is when we really start creating our high school legacy, so you might as well start a tradition of throwing cast parties here. The best brother in the world deserves the best sister; we may not have all the same interests, but I admire your passions and want you to thrive, Raz. Or junior, don’t rule them out, the idea of one of them taking you seems much more probable. You’re friendzoned her, fine. Does that mean there’s another girl you find more desirable than her, or are you just waiting for the right one? Or is it a boy? Mom will be so glad I’m first in line for the throne if it’s a boy. That’s too much ewing, no wonder you’re the drama specialist.

[sawyerofagrabah]

amadeusradcliffe:

I meant love stories for me, Sawyer, love stories for me! I’d be lucky to be half as in love as your moms or the kings someday, trust me, I know, but I know what I like and guys just don’t give me butterflies the way a pretty girl interested in my craft does. Our culture likes respectability and hard work enough, but you know, there’s something to be said for fun, too - it’s why Kings Will and Blake are the perfect couple, King Will takes care of the respectability and hard work, and King Blake takes care of the fun! You gotta have some of both to be the winning combo. Fabio. My full name is Amadeus Fabio Radcliffe. I guess Mom wanted to pay homage to her romance novel lifestyle, but bleck, I’m not a fan. It sounds pretentious and I try real hard not to be.

That makes much more sense; wow, I can’t believe I missed the context clues on that one. I was so ready to go into lecture mode like mom would have that I didn’t even realize it was you-specific. So you need adoring piano fangirls? You should offer to do the music for one of Raz’s little musicals, I bet that would help you meet girls who appreciate it and it would get you more involved in showing off your school spirit. You think it sounds pretentious? I actually think it sounds the opposite, but either way it’s not nearly as embarrassing as you think it is. I kind of like it, really.

[sawyerofagrabah]

razsterpiece:

Even though you’d look great in a nutty costume, I have to agree, not your thing. You’re too much of a control freak - which isn’t a bad thing, mind you, it’s just true! You’d make a great stage manager if you ever had enough time in your weird schedule, you know. Cast parties are fun, for sure, but it’s not the same as school dances! AP goes all out, and cast parties are basically just excuses for everyone to drink which is not as fun as a space where everyone can just dance. Wait, if you don’t pass your classes, you can’t go to prom? Woah! I didn’t know that! So you’re, like, using prom as the carrot, then, right? The carrot in front of the donkey that is junior and senior class - you make a lot of sense, but I wish you didn’t because I still want to fight for my right to party. Well, I mean, first of all, for the millionth time, Margarita isn’t my girlfriend, and second of all, ew! Um…maybe Mom and Uncle Zac did the normal thing and didn’t talk about being deflowered, ever? Like, I love you, Sawyer, but I’m glad that’s one conversation you and I never need to have on your behalf, let’s not have it on mine, kay?

Don’t worry, little brother, I’d never try to deny the control freak claims. I’m self-aware. My schedule’s not weird, it’s full of student council and other clubs that you’d never be caught dead in in a million years, just like I wouldn’t be caught dead invading your stage. Okay, well then why don’t you try hosting a cast party here and mixing things up a little? No one’s going to drink when the student body president lives in the same house, you could set up your own dance floor -- throw the cast party your way. Yes, prom is the proverbial carrot, that’s a great way to think of it. They have to earn their right to go to prom, it’s motivation to keep working hard so that they can participate in one of high school’s most iconic cliches. First of all, I don’t believe you, you spend like 24/7 with her and you’re definitely charming enough to have a girlfriend, which seems to be all other boys in our grade care about. And second of all, I said ew first! You can’t ew one up me, I already ewed. 

[sawyerofagrabah]

amadeusradcliffe:

It’s not “defensiveness” over my sexuality, it’s, like, honesty. Trust me, AppleSaws, but if you were in my brain, you’d get how I consider myself straight enough. Too straight, maybe, even. Every love story in my brain is a man and a woman, and yeah, that might change someday, but as of now? My future Mr.s and muse is very much a girl. Ludwig, on the other hand? Who knows what’s going on in that head. Hey, if you got it, flaunt it, showing off isn’t a bad thing, it just means you know your strengths. Secret agent is cooler, even if “honest civil servant” sounds more respectable or whatever, people react to cooler better. What? Nooooo, Amadeus Mozart Radcliffe is too obvious.

Your brain sounds like an even more terrifying place to be than my brother’s, so I’ll have to pass. I’d rather pick your brain on more important things, not on what appeals to you about the feminine form. If every love story in your brain is heterosexual, does that mean you discount couples like my moms or Adam’s dads? I wish that we could change our culture so that people admired respectability and hard work more, but ugh, I’ll take your suggestion to heart and try to find a way to incorporate it into my next initiative somehow. Well, of course it’s obvious, that’s why I guessed it. If not Mozart, then what is it?

[sawyerofagrabah]

FMK: Adam, Phillip, Benji

F: @phillipofcamelot, I guess? He’s quite handsome, and more mature than Benji.M: @auradonsadam. If he can handle running a whole kingdom he can certainly handle being a good husband.K: @misterstealyohearts. His URL says it all.

[sawyerofagrabah]

razsterpiece:

Don’t worry, I was mainly teasing. I want to run Agrabah about as much as you would want to star in Hairspray, meaning very very little. I guess I’m glad you have the student council, though, keeps you from backseat ruling with our moms too much. You’ll get your turn, Sawyer. YES, an underclassman prom! We don’t have other dances at the end of the year, what am I supposed to do with all this dance mojo? Just hold it in until homecoming? And it’s not like the senior appreciate love much either - guys like Benji could go and I, lover of love and all things amazing, can’t? How is that fair? And - oh, the theater budget. Yeah, last year’s senior’s went crazy with their final show or something, it’s, like, shot. That’s not a big deal, though, I’ll just ask Mom if I can donate like half my money or something, it shouldn’t hurt the budget too much.

Ha, no. I’m good at public speaking and debating, but I don’t want to put on nutty costumes and sing catchy songs. Even if I ever did help out with a theater production, I’d want to be a stage manager or director or something where I felt like I had a little more semblance of control. That’s true, the back half of the year is a little dance light, but do you really need that many dances? Don’t you have cast parties for that instead? Benji gets to go if he passes his classes, and I’m sure his presence would be more to Krisitna’s benefit than to his own. It’s not all about love, that’s just one of the many reasons. Seniors and juniors also need something to incentivize them; everyone says junior year is the most academically rigorous, whereas seniors start to get to apathetic too close to graduation. Prom is a light at the end of the tunnel for them; sophomores and freshmen just don’t need that kind of motivator. If you love love so much, just get Magarita and go out to a teen dance club tomorrow and love each other all night long. But in an appropriate way, of course! I’m not ready to think about my brother being deflowered, ew. I wonder how mom dealt with this with Uncle Zac...

[sawyerofagrabah]

amadeusradcliffe:

Or husband! We don’t wanna presume what he’s into, but my money’s on dudes, since I’m straight enough for the both of us and there’s always at least one non-straight person in each family, right? But psshh, if Ludwig’s got a soulmate out there, a little thing like initials isn’t going to throw them off. Yeah, yeah, you got unlimited access to pretty much everything, don’t you, you showoff? That’s pretty cool, though. It’s like you’re a secret agent with top level clearance or something. I’m not telling! It’s not a bad middle name, it just doesn’t like…fit the aesthetic.

Or husband, absolutely, of course, but I think your rationale for why it might be a husband is flawed. It’s not possible to be ‘straight enough for both of you’ and if anything I think your defensiveness over your sexuality calls it into question much more than Ludwig’s. I’m not a showoff, I just work hard, that’s different. I prefer to think of myself as an honest civil servant, but if secret agent will make people respect the student council more then... sure. It’s Mozart, isn’t it? Amadeus Mozart Radcliffe?

[sawyerofagrabah]

@razsterpiece:

You coooooould always turn it down like Uncle Gavin did and give it all to me if you wanted to go do anything else, but I’d so rather you didn’t. I’ve got performances waiting for me in life, and I can’t imagine you doing anything else. You’ve been talking like a grownup practically since we were born, it’s in your blood. If you’re looking for stuff to improve upon as student body president though, can I request an underclassman prom for this year? Sitting out freshman year was bad enough, and it’s not fair that I don’t get to get my groove on just because I was born the year I was born in!

I love you very much, Razoul, but I’m not planning on just handing you the kingdom someday. I know you wouldn’t run it into the ground like Uncle Gavin might have, but I also know you’ve got other priorities, and this is my priority. Agrabah is my everything, or it will be once I leave Auradon Prep and stop focusing so much on the good of the school. An underclassman prom? But we’ve got other dances, Raz. Prom isn’t as special for people if they can go to it every year, they save it for the older grades because that’s when people might actually appreciate love enough to have a romantic evening at prom. You’d just be cheapening the importance of your upperclassman prom if I agreed to that -- and you’d also be cutting into the budget that I’m trying to get back to your theater program, after the mess it’s in at the moment.

[sawyerofagrabah]

amadeusradcliffe:

Come on, See-Saw, it’s not trolling if it’s fun and harmless. Everyone knows he’s my brother, calling him Von Radcliffe won’t do anything other than make him happy, and there’s nothing wrong with that. But uh, hey, full names aren’t actually visible on public records, right? Because if so I’d totally want to strike my middle name from ever being found ever. It’s not bad but it ruins the flow of Amadeus Radcliffe.

His future wife could be reading these messages, and she could start doodling the wrong initials in her notebook, and then he could think she has feelings for someone else and their whole life path could be thrown off kilter. They may not be public record, but they are on record at the palace in Auradon City, and my student council connections would be happy to get me inside the records room if I asked. What could your middle name be that would possibly be that flow-ruining?

[amadeusradcliffe]

Is your brother's name really Ludwig von Radcliffe?

Ludwig von Radcliffe. It sounds freaking awesome, doesn’t it? His birth certificate may or may not have a “von” on it, but that doesn’t matter nearly as much as what the little dude’s truth is, so LVR it is. Pass it on, make sure it sticks. That’ll make him happy.

[sawyerofagrabah]

Don’t troll the poor people, Amadeus! There’s no way that there’s a ‘von’ on his birth certificate, but if those kinds of things are public record, I’d be happy to prove it if you need me to.