I am discontinuing the tournament
I’ve gotten a lot of comments and messages from people who are upset about many things, mainly about my decision to include characters who are canonically or allegorically transgender or nonbinary. I did not want to take this topic lightly and needed time to think about this issue. Characters such as Mad Mew Mew, Mettaton, Chihiro, Nimona, Frisk, and Kris have been particularly controversial. The inclusion of characters who are villains or are from problematic media has also been an issue people were concerned about. Those characters include Belos from the Owl House, Hisoka from Hunter x Hunter, Hanji from Attack on Titan, and Butters and Kenny from South Park.
I understand the long history of erasure, violence, and transphobia transgender women have faced. I understand that implying a canonical trans fem character could be interpreted as trans masc can be seen as erasing or ignoring her identity. Deciding to include canonical trans and nonbinary characters, especially without consulting my followers on their opinion, was a mistake. My bracket and posts have hurt people, mainly trans women. I am sorry. I am sorry for the pain I have caused. I am sorry for not having planned out the bracket in a more careful way beforehand to prevent these issues. I am sorry for not explaining my intent, reasoning, and opinion on these issues more clearly until now.
I would like to explain my reasoning for deciding to include canonical trans and nonbinary characters in the bracket. There are some experiences that are universally trans, regardless of whether you are trans masc or trans fem. I love characters that explore this intersection between trans masculinity and trans femininity and can be simultaneously interpreted as both trans masc and trans fem. As a transgender person myself, I love seeing my own transgender experiences reflected back at me in trans characters of the ‘opposite’ gender. Being able to see a trans character, regardless if we are both trans in the same way, and have my own feelings about gender represented makes the world feel less small. Stories with transgender characters are hard to come by and I, as many, cling to scraps like a ravenous dog. Finding myself in transgender characters that are trans in a different way than me expands the possibility of representation. I don’t intend to erase the trans identity of these characters. I don’t believe the people who submitted them intend to erase these characters' identities either. I think I and the submitters are seeing our own transgender experiences in an unintended place. I, and I assume the submitters, do not want to discredit, erase, or negate the representation the characters have created. I know just because I did not intend to cause harm doesn’t mean the harm is less damaging or I need to be forgiven. I just hope you can understand I did not make those decisions maliciously.
People were also upset that I included canonically nonbinary characters and stated “There are so many different ways to be nonbinary! … [H]ow Kris [a nonbinary character] presents and expresses their gender is currently open to interpretation.” I once again do not mean to erase the nonbinary representation created by the characters in the bracket. I did not properly explain my opinion about Kris in the previous statement. I failed to be more nuanced and complete in that post. I wish to better explain myself now. There are many different ways to be nonbinary. You do not have to be androgynous. You can still identify as trans masc or trans fem and be nonbinary. You can be both. You can be neither. There is not one way. So there is not one way for this character to be nonbinary. There is not one way for any character to be nonbinary. There is not one way for any person to be nonbinary. You can still interpret Kris to be more masc or fem or androgynous. Doing so does not negate that Kris (or any character) is nonbinary. How you present does not negate the gender of any nonbinary person.
The characters from problematic media and characters who, in and of themselves, are problematic were included because I believe that the problems within them or their media did not counteract the popular interpretations of their gender that make them qualified to compete in the tournament. Yes Belos is a colonizer, Hisoka is a pedophile, Attack on Titan contains many pro-facist and Nazi themes and imagery, and South Park fails as a satire by perpetuating the racism, homophobia, transphobia, anti-semitism, and other bigotry it claims to be making fun of.
However queer people are messy. Queer people are not perfect. Some queer people are bigoted and actively damage the queer community. It is unrealistic to not expect us to occasionally see ourselves within problematic characters or media. It is dangerous to expect us to never be problematic or be in problematic media. Queerness is not wholesome, but queerness is not offensive debauchery either. Excluding characters for being problematic would have removed the nuance of what it means to be queer from the bracket which is why I chose to include them. This was a controversial decision but I stand by it. There are still complex conversations to be had about these characters, their gender, queer coding, and the morality of their existence. I am sorry for not having created the space to productively have that conversation.
Including problematic characters and problematic media also does not equate to me, voters, or the people who submitted them of supporting the bigotry or harmful stereotypes present in their media. I believe you can critically consume, and even enjoy, problematic media while still acknowledging its flaws and refusing to perpetuate them. Some comments and messages I have received did not seem to want to entertain this possibility and immediately assumed I and those involved are Nazis, transphobic, racist, etc. I do not support the bigoted beliefs present in the problematic media or characters in the bracket. In good faith, I assume the voters and submitters also do not support those bigoted beliefs. It is dangerous to automatically assume bad faith in others. I understand my lack of response and my failure to better articulate my opinions led to the community continuing to make those assumptions. I could have addressed this issue sooner before things got out of hand. I could have communicated better and more clearly with you guys about these issues. I am sorry for failing to better communicate with this community and being unclear with my intentions and beliefs.
People have also been upset I haven’t yet addressed the issue, responded to any messages , or asks pertaining to it. Some of those messages were reasonable and calmly explained their issues with me, while others contained death threats. I have gotten an overwhelming number of messages claiming I do not care or am ignoring the issue since I haven’t responded. I wanted to step back, hear what you guys had to say, and thoughtfully respond. I didn’t want to impulsively lash out towards inflammatory statements, and taking the time away to reflect on everything was necessary to do that. I still have lots to think about, but understand a timely response is needed. I hope you can understand the time I spent away from the blog was not done in vain.
People were also upset that I restricted comments on some posts, turned reblogs off on some posts, turned off my ask box, and turned off my messages. The amount of notifications and hostile comments and messages was overwhelming at certain points. Restricting comments and reblogs on certain posts helped alleviate that without completely shutting down the conversations happening. I recently turned off all comments, asks, and messages two days ago to help focus on the messages and asks I already had about everything. After receiving death threats and many hostile messages, it felt best to prevent me from getting more before I got a chance to address the situation. I understand people were upset at that choice and it made it appear as I was avoiding the issue. Once again this led to bad faith assumptions about me and the blog. I hope you can understand I have a life. I am a person. I need time to read what you send me, to process it, to thoughtfully give you the time to write the quality response you deserve. I am sorry I made these decisions without informing the community why those decisions were made. I left you in the dark and I shouldn’t have. After posting this I will turn comments, asks, and messages back on. I do not plan to respond to any of them, but I want to hear what you guys have to say. I want to provide the space for the community to discuss this.
I intended for this bracket to be a place to discuss various interpretations of characters and share this love with others; and there has been a lot of love and excitement. I looked forward to seeing new messages with propaganda and people rooting for their beloved characters. Many people have made amazing art, videos, and posts to promote their characters. I have loved all of it, but I think it needs to come to an end. Right now I think it would be best to discontinue the bracket. I do not know if I will ever come back, post on this account, or try to restart the tournament. As of right now, I do not plan to delete the blog. I still see gems within this community and blog. Many people have started amazing, nuanced discussions about gender and queerness, and I do not want to squash or erase that from the blog. There is still good here. Even if you don’t want it. Even if you don’t like it. Even if you don’t see it.
