to build on this thanks to anon putting it back in my mind, like...
i always love when Bruce Wayne as a persona is a fun, bubbly sort of guy, that he's just considered vapid, right? and esp bc he says things frequently that are stupid as fuck and end up being quoted all around the tabloids, often well-meaning and earnest, but generally just indicative of a stereotypical playboy bunny-esque personality - he's there to look pretty, he's rich enough that he's never had to learn to live like a normal person, and people rush to do whatever he needs or wants, so he never has to do much thinking
and because he's a man, and especially because he's ruggedly handsome with a cleft in his chin and does not look like people imagine a queer man to look - no matter that he regularly says he's bisexual in interviews, or refers to ex-boyfriends or is seen with other queer men, it will be treated every time as a revelation or just him hanging out with some curiously queer people rather than with any seriousness - he won't receive the hatred or misogyny that you'd expect say, a paris hilton to receive
bruce wayne can be vapid and pretty and stupid, but bc he's a man and not a woman, he'll be given more leeway, treated as more harmless, but also seen as even less of a threat than a ~conniving~ woman trying to get somebody else's fortune or whatever
and esp bc bruce is a white guy like... taking in orphans all the time, not irregularly there'll be shit in the media about him being toonaive and too charitable, and that's why he keeps helping all these ppl who don't deserve it - dick grayson particularly, who's probably frequently racially fetishised in a lot of the presses even before he comes out as bisexual himself, and then damian, esp when he's older, getting similar treatment
and that's just ppl going "oh this poor naive man is being led astray and made to think poc should have rights!", not even thinking abt more complex stuff like bruce being earnestly pro-migrant, pro-disability, pro-reparations, etc etc
but that's the whole value of the himbo persona, right? he's able to be earnestly left-wing and honestly quite radical, he can throw money into it, and bc he can act like he's just super easily swayed by diff causes etc, the creeps in gotham who are far more regressive won't necessarily put him down, bc he's not like his parents, who were traitors to their (white, evil, corrupt) way of life, he's just... you know... a little slow
so, imagine you're the joker.
as you do from time to time, you've decided you need a new pet project, something to entertain you. things have been getting so stale of recent, and as you do your usual mischief around the city - kill a few veterinarians while having your guys dressed as cats do some mischief on the gotham streets, you know, just a bit of kooky fun for international cat day - it's just not hitting like it should
and you just happen to see playboy millionaire bruce wayne out for lunch with some socialite, and normally you'd kidnap her, but you've always considered yourself an equal opportunities kidnapper, and you'd not want to be accused of choosing your victims based off of something as cliché as sexism - you're an upstanding, modern clown!
so you hold a gun to his head, and say, "listen, brucie, i bet you know the drill."
"valuables in the bag?" he asks, kind of even in the voice, almost sweet, although his eyes have widened and his lips have parted.
"kinda," you say with a giggle as batsy's rich girlfriend puts her hand over her mouth. "a little bit different today."
he is honestly pretty nice about the whole thing. like, weirdly patient, obviously scared, but for god's sake, the guy tips his waiter as you escort him out of the place, and when you ask very casually for him to pass you a different handgun out of the dashboard, his voice quavers, but he asks, "um, do you mean the actual gun, or the water pistol?" and smiles nervously back when you say the latter
point is, he's not shivering or shaking. he's not begging for his life or crying. he even stood between you and his girlfriend when you sized her up and thought about taking her too, and as you chatter on at him, he talks back
"kiddo," you say, "you do realise i might just kill you tonight?"
"why would you do that?" he asks.
"uh, because i'm a crazed psycho killer?"
"i think that's just an act you put on," he says, almost confidently, and he meets your gaze with those beautiful baby blues of his. "you're not as crazy as you look."
"huh," you say, narrowing your eyes and lunging closer - and what's funny about it is, he doesn't flinch. he stays right there, looking at you, and although his eyes widen and his mouth opens wider, it happens just a second too late for you to believe it. "that's real funny, brucie. seems to me that i'm not the only one between us who might be putting on act."
he puts on a smile, tries to look nervous again, more nervous, but it's too late - you've got the scent now. and when you let him go, he actually puts his hand on your wrist and says some crazy bullshit about how he knows people just haven't been kind enough to you, and he just hopes you'd call on him if you ever wanted things to change
people do that sometimes - normally weird religious types - but you get the impression that he means it, and you start doing your research. everything bruce wayne's ever donated to, ever spent money on.
you start noticing patterns.
you start planting bugs, spying on his dates, and you find that a lot of his girlfriends know what you're finding out - that bruce wayne isn't as stupid as he looks, that he's not just a pretty face, that there's a keen and calculating little business brain under all that handsome, that he puts on a show just to get his charity under the radar
you find him again, on some beach holiday. he lies and says, "oh. i was hoping i'd see you again."
and you say, "you know, brucie, i think you're hiding something."
he looks at you so, so fucking innocently. "i'm not hiding anything," he says.
"you sure?" you ask, slipping closer, grinning. "you sure there's no secret identity under that cleft chin and tight t-shirt?"
and there's the thing. here's the first clue you get that there's even more to this mook than there seems, even more than you've already dug down under, because for a second, just a second, his pretty eyes go flinty. they go hard.
it actually makes a shiver run down your spine, and there's not many in the city who could make your body do that little primal reaction - how long's it been since you have played a special game with batman, anyway?
it only lasts for a second, less than that, and then his eyes are just as soft as they pretend to be as he goes, in a more serious voice - slightly lower cadence than his himbo voice, slightly less airy, "it's not like you're the only one who knows," he murmurs. "this is a pretty unpleasant city, mr joker. sometimes it's easier to pretend you're just a handsome face."
"mr," you repeat, "oh, that's cute. that work on a lot of guys?"
and you take a step closer, examining him carefully, trying to find that steel hardness again, but it's not there.
"say, brucie," you say, and you put your hand on his pecs, and now he shivers. "you ever been with a man?"
"uh huh," he says. "a few times."
"... you screwing with me?"
and he grins at you, so fucking pretty, and you laugh too, because gee, the bastard got you, and that's just dandy, you'll let this one slide - but. but, but, but.
"you ever fuck nasty, then?" you ask. "you ever pin a man down while he's bleeding, you ever make him beg?"
"what?" he asks, just a second too late. "no."
because that's where your assumption goes with his guy. not that he's batman - that there's a sadistic streak under those layers, and obviously, if you're the joker, one of the biggest masochists on earth, of course you're going to want to tease it out