"What Fresh Hell Can This Be?"

Daydream believer. Homecoming queen.

[catboybreeder]

when your friend starts some drama and says “a little bird told me…” and you know full well you’re the little bird

[cassandracalin]

[bantarleton]

So the airbase has a commander whose name is Sergeant. His rank is Lieutenant Colonel and his office is, of course, private.

[lexablackbird]

this is even better than Major Major in Catch-22

[homunculus-argument]

You ever been in a state where you physically have no energy, but you're bored and socially understimulated so you kind of wish you could just invite people to come over like this:

[malibuklaus]

[funhomes]

i’m home sick with the flu and i just received this email from my father

[baph-omet]

This blog is a safe space for vegetables. Veggie-haters keep scrolling.

I love you onions

I love you garlic

I love you bell peppers

I love you cucumbers

I love you tomatoes

I love you lettuce

I love you spinach

I love you squash

I love you radishes

I love you turnips and rutabagas

I love you potatoes

I love you carrots

I love you corn

I love you cabbage

I love you green beans

I love you peas

I love you soybeans

I love you broccoli

I love you celery

I love you collards

I love you sweet potatoes

I love you taro and ube

I love you pumpkins

I love you eggplant

I love you chili peppers

I love you beans

I love you okra

I love you chives

I love you shallots

I love you beets

I love you ginger

I love you nori

I love you mushrooms

[tpwrtrmnky]

Oh no, a plan I had today was cancelled, now I have to allocate that block of time to something else but it has Plan Residue all over it, fuck,

[dialogic]

u know someone’s about to get dragged through the mud when an academic uses the phrase ‘it’s tempting to assume’

[apricops]

“it’s tempting to assume” is academic speaking for “you might think, if you’re a fucking idiot,”

[urbanlegends]

nurse feratu and dr. acula are ready to see you for your blood tests

[weenhands-deactivated20250319]

i’m okay with change and i’m fine if things are no longer the same i embrace change

[hbmmaster]

how much does the aurora borealis weigh

[hbmmaster]

it's pretty light

[gender-anarchy-deactivated20250]

[kaijuno]

WHO tf keeping pads with no wings in production?? Put it in your draws and by the time you walk out the bathroom it’s down the street buying scratch offs at the corner store. Like girl

[the-real-seebs]

one of my favorite genres of post is "evocative imagery"

[romcommunist]

the name "theresa" is so funny like. theres a what

[fried-berries]

[dent-de-l1on]

de naam 'eris' is zo grappig. er is wat?

[shieldfoss]

Navnet "erik" er så spøgst. Han er ik hvad?

[bidonica]

Mi fa troppo ridere il nome "Donna", sì ho capito che sei una donna ma come ti chiami

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

Mae'r enwau "Beth" a "Pam" yn mor ddoniol. Pam beth? Beth pam?

[nohoperadio]

A spoon's only objective in life is to make soup go upwards, and it knows this. That's why when you put one under a running tap it blasts the water way high. The spoon thinks there's suddenly TONS of soup to deal with and it freaks out.

[shadow27]

[witchofprose-deactivated2020041]

This is the FUNNIEST SHIT I HAVE EVER SEEN

[untitled12573]

Reblogging for cultural enrichment

[lab-gr0wn-lambs]

bout time I brought back the Laurel and Hardy flex tape-

[knitmeapony]

From The Killers, 1946. A Film Noir Classic

[theprofessional-amateur]

I’m an archivist, behold my growing collection was of old photos mirroring timeless memes I’ve come across at various places I’ve worked.

[kaijuno]

[arctech-fox]