gio/ash • 26 • she/they • @ woozioveralls on twitter • i caved in and changed my 2013 layout • if you're here from twitter follow me on my sideblog: woozioveralls
Surprise, not dead yet. But I do come with a new plot thot idea for a modern online influencer au Steddie…
Picture it.
Steve is one those super cringe and annoying influencers who do stupid stuff, like the Stay Wild guys. (Apologies to anyone who likes that stuff, but my godson is obsessed with those videos and I’m ready to gouge my eyes out after having them play on repeat all day.) His brand is called like KingSteve or something and he’s basically how season 1 Steve was in the first episodes but cranked up to 11 (pun not intended).
He gives off the whole jock thing to perfection.
Eddie is frontman of a metal band that boasts of a pretty decent online following but it’s nothing special. Certainly not the type of views that KingSteve gets, who is a household name for people in the online influencer world. He gets invited to red carpets events and everything. Eddie and the Corroded Coffin boys have done some shows, but always more of the indie type and nothing mainstream.
Eddie viscerally hates KingSteve.
He’s just like the kind of guys who would bully Eddie in high school, who used to “gay” to mean bad and gross, who had a silver spoon all their life and took every privilege for granted. (Even if he did pick up on some weird homoerotic subtext with one of KingSteve’s fellow influencers and friends, TomTomTiger, who made up the second person in the super popular trio, Stomrol, the “last being PerkyCarol.)
Eddie hates KingSteve, hates how he knows KingSteve is the same off camera and on, because that’s just how those sorts of influencers are—the ones who care about popularity.
And then Stomrol stops producing videos together. KingSteve still thrives, KingSteve is still the same as always, but suddenly he’s unfollowed both TomTomTiger and PerkyCarol, suddenly it’s just him. At least for a while.
Then RockinRobin makes an appearance. RockinRobin with her little violet flower pin on her lapel, with her entire aesthetic that looks so different from KingSteve, RockinRobin who throws herself over KingSteve all the time and yet there’s none of the tension between them that Eddie swears existed between KingSteve and TomTomTiger, at least on TomTomTiger’s part.
Also, Eddie is pretty sure he saw a pair of tits drawn on her shows when they were briefly seen on camera.
KingSteve is still the same tho. He still acts like a jock, still acts stupid and annoying and everything Eddie dislikes. Still makes those dumb fucking videos.
And then, during a live stream, some kids busts in demanding KingSteve hurry up so they can watch the new Corroded Coffin music video together.
Corroded Coffin’s views explode.
Corroded Coffin doesn’t know why at first, but eventually they read the comments and see the link to the now posted KingSteve stream. They don’t know what to think about it, but soon they’re too busy to think about anything because suddenly they have requests for shows, are invited to events, and eventually they’re even invited to those sorts of prestigious influencer parties they’ve always mocked—partly, admittedly, because they’d never been invited.
Eddie is off having a drink, feeling super out of place but refusing to show it, when the most attractive guy he’s ever seen walks up to introduce himself. This guy with the sweetest smile on his face and the softest expression and such a gentle way of speaking and who is, undoubtedly, KingSteve.
Except he’s nothing like the KingSteve he is on camera. He’s sweet and funny and kind of a dork, actually, and he’s jocky, sure, but he’s also so much more. And when Eddie mentions the kids who name dropped his band on KingSteve’s live stream, KingSteve gets such an affectionate and indulgent look on his face that can’t be an act.
And Eddie realizes with growing horror, worsened when RockinRobin glomps on to Steve squealing that she got the ChrissyCuntingham’s number (a former golden child influencer who now speaks out against eating disorders and the pressure put on the youth and toxic purity culture) and his affectionate expression only grew as he enthusiastically congratulated and supported her, that Eddie was very much already halfway in love with this contradictory man who was absolutely nothing like his online public persona but everything like the man of Eddie’s dreams.
Later, though not too much later, after Eddie and Steve become friends and grow closer, Eddie will finally meet these strange children in Steve’s life and become instantly fond of all of them and even more deeply enamored with Steve’s mother hen tendencies towards them and takes to the kids as if they were his own…that Steve will decide that Eddie is everything like the man of his dreams too.
Of course they collab and first star on each other’s channels, and though Steve keeps up his online persona, he softens too, especially when Eddie guest stars on his channel, or he guest stars on Corroded Coffin’s (or their connected DnD account, Hellfire Club, sometimes with the kids and sometimes not). And really, it’s inevitable that the internet starts shipping them.
Maybe it takes years for them to confirm anything, because of course they start dating not long after meeting each other that very first night. Or maybe Steve is done playing it safe, and maybe he wears a “Steddie” shirt with a picture of him and Eddie on it and the words “my ship is real” during one of his videos, and maybe Eddie writes a love song about brown eyes and some certain famous moles.
Idk. Idk how any of it goes. All I know is that I started wondering how those annoying influencers act in real life off camera, which ones are their public personas and which ones are completely different, and couldn’t help but drunkenly Steddiefy that thought.
And now I shall disappear into the ethers again for the foreseeable future while the ao3 curse continues to wreak havoc in my life.
#idk what this means or if i do this but ig i'll just hold my phone with my pinky stuck out from now on??
Good question, also no that won’t help.
shitty MS Paint 3 minutes doodle, nto entirely accurate: When you have your pinky hooked on the “bottom” edge of the phone for the extra security so it doesn’t slide out of your hand that easily, you’re wreaking damage on your hand, since the pinky is extremely askew from it’s resting position. You might have noticed that when you hold your phone like that for long time it begins to hurt, like when you are gripping a pen too tightly for example.
Green lines - the fingers are going their natural way. Red line - the pinky is way off, that’s bad.
if phil pulling a FORK out of his pocket right before they start Twilight doesnt resonate with you and confirm that he's the funniest man alive? i fear i cannot help you understand his whimsy lmao
