sparks

an internet dork | pan | enby | they/them | 24

[ixa193]

[catgirlforeskin]

THAT’S WHERE THIS IS FROM??

[ixa193]

[catgirlforeskin]

THAT’S WHERE THIS IS FROM??

[enki2]

[confines]

communication

[bacteriumphage]

You guys are so close to getting it

[skinks]

I love that thing when people get a little bit tongue-tied and garble what they’re trying to say so they make a little “blegh” 👅 noise and start over. verbal reset button. hitting the top of the tv to unscramble the signal

[recklessmoss]

say what u want about the manscaped ads I know they are shit, all of them but the “evil, sinister, malcontent, balls” one puts me into fucking hysterics actually

[recklessmoss]

please this is SO funny

[recklessmoss]

HUH?!

[bigbadbutch]

[pinklocksoflove]

[pronouncingitwang]

at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you

[yokowan]

at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.

[le-jardin-inculte]

at some point in your life you will be making some sort of cream based dessert that requires gelatin to thicken it. and you will soak some gelatin sheets in water and think "this is too few gelatin sheets for this amount of cream." this is the devil speaking. it will thicken in the fridge and if you add too much you will end up with milk jelly

[shithowdy]

at some point in your life you will be baking cookies. you will take the sheet out after twelve minutes as the recipe instructs and the cookies will still be glistening and soft. "these don't seem cooked enough," you will think to yourself, "i should place them back into the oven until their edges are nice and golden." this is the devil talking. this is how you get dry, overdone cookies. the cookies will continue to bake on the warm sheet for several more minutes and then harden up after sitting on a rack for a while. trust the process. trust the process.

[whitachi]

at some point in your life you will be adding a small pasta to a soup and you will think "that is not enough small pasta." this is the devil talking. the pasta will absorb the stock and expand. this is how you end up with a soup that is a solid mass of soggy ditalini.

[araceil]

At some point in your life you will be adding garlic to a dish and you will think "that is not enough garlic." These are angels speaking. They are correct. Add more garlic.

[factbot]

[despazito]

the second radish is 29 feet away

[tranarchist]

[acreaturecalledgreed]

incredibly bizarre and confusing seeing ppl call themselves "chuds" all the sudden b/c like

thats what we call neo nazis and shitty conservative bros? or at least its what we used to call them? why are ppl calling themselves "chuds" affectionately now

what is happening

yall know chud means fascist right like please tell me yall know that

[acreaturecalledgreed]

im hoping this is a case of "younger folks on the internet adopting Silly Word b/c its Silly and not realizing it actually means something"

so here's me educating! you're calling yourselves fascists! thats what you're doing! maybe don't do that and use your head before you start using every goofy word you see!

[acreaturecalledgreed]

let me be agonizingly clear

when you call yourself and your friends "chuds"

YOU

ARE

CALLING

YOURSELF

A

NAZI

[devotedprism]

Wikipedia screenshots for those unwilling or unable to look it up to verify. Article link here(link). Transcriptions are in alt text.

A reminder: "TND" is a Nazi dogwhistle, originating from the phrase "total (n slur) death."

[wereralph]

after my werewolf boyfriend pulls out

[smatter-deactivated20220909]

your WHAT

[wereralph]

My

Werewolf Boyfriend

[angelgurlhearts-2]

I’m sorry, am I reading that right??

[wereralph]

MY

[commanderforeskin-deactivated20]

So we’re just gonna ignore the watermelon getting crushed?

[wereralph]

Watermelon

[peniswakt-deactivated20210717]

[omigawdmatt]

Hey so does anyone have the nsfw version for that werewolf pic just asking

[greylilacs]

[rattmice]

I’m sorry what

[wereralph]

i know im op this thread has absolutely gotten out of control

[bananapeelchunk]

hold on op, aren’t you the person who had an iq of 4?

[wereralph]

[eyaji]

I’m crying. Nobody’s clearing anything up, they just deflect onto the next plot twist

[everyone-loves-purple]

WHAT IS HAPPENING??????

[fruitypebble]

OP’S THE GUY FROM THE HORNY IHOP WAITER POST

[pocketdictator]

THE HORNY WHAT?????

[wereralph]

[transmadotsuki]

Since we’re just listing them off my favorite Wereralph post is the poptart pussy one

[self-loathsome-deactivated20220]

THE WHAT?!

[transmadotsuki]

THIS ONE

[baconis42]

I am so fucking concerned for the mental health of 95% of the people on this hellsite

[mysofthoneybee]

personally i’m at 96%

[midnight-spectrum-again]

This post keeps getting worse

[hellcatbruiser]

I often find myself wondering how this website is so utterly incapable of making money, and then I see posts like this and I am violently given my answer.

[carthages-finest]

For the love of god, stop asking “the what?” that’s how this continues!

[midnight-spectrum-again]

But what about the thirty for Minotaur?

[sovereignant]

Ahem.

The what?

[midnight-spectrum-again]

Always Corny On Main

Beautiful

[sovereignant]

No. Canceled.

[midnight-spectrum-again]

But why???

[the-peculiar-bi-tch]

I

Just

What the fuck do I do with this information now

[smegbertmarbles]

GUYS stop reblogging this. OP was in the Marine Core and is technically a war criminal. He turned a blind eye when his comrades killed innocent civilians in Baghdad. He refused testify against soldiers who committed atrocities towards civilians. Stop reblogging OPs posts because that takes attention away from what OP is trying to hide.

[wereralph]

You sure that’s me?

Like are you sure that’s me??

[graceiscringylmao]

I’M- THATS ADAM DRIVER

[ruimtetijd]

Why on God’s green Earth would you expose your goddamn face wereralph. Do I even want to know why your name is wereralph? Don’t answer that.

[wereralph]

its because i like werewolves and my real name is ralph, it’s just that simple. not everything has a crazy explanation

[sodomymcscurvylegs]

Me every time wereralph posts

[systlin]

People paid Actual Money for this website

[triflesandparsnips]

The Wolf Master (nsfw)

[likethesword]

The end of an era

[angstycatthatlikestea-deactivat]

i miss wereralph :(

[were-ralph]

pussy so fat staff had to ban me twice

[maxxayz]

[were--ralph]

THEY CAN BAN ME THREE TIMES BUT THEY CAN’T BAN THIS PUSSY

[deepestfriendgoophero]

They will NEVER kill the king!

[were--ralph]

something disastrous happened here

[were---ralph]

RETURN TO LIFE

[timegears-moved-deactivated2025]

twilight princess funniest zelda game ever made

[timegears-moved-deactivated2025]

one of the reoccurring minor plots is that a 3 year old with the mental capacity of an adult is trying to abolish capitalism in the big city. there's a yeti couple living in an abandoned mansion and the guy yeti is like 10 times the size of and more visibly monstrous than the girl yet they made him a malewife. you can collect insects for a little girl that is insane about them and gives you strange and off-putting dialogue about each bug everytime you give her one and practically threatens you if you try to leave her home without giving her bugs she doesn't have yet. one of the modes of transportation in this game is being shot out of a giant canon by a depressed clown and landing on your feet with no injuries. there's a spaghetti western style minigame where the objective is to talk to 20 different cats. a chicken attempts to flirt with link. they made tingle into a sexyman caricature.

[timegears-moved-deactivated2025]

i completely forgot about ooccoo while making this post. this fucking thing:

[timegears-moved-deactivated2025]

and, of course, her son too

[loreleywrites]

Every time someone says that Twilight Princess is too grimdark and serious, I want to point them to this post. It’s a very silly game.

[jairus666]

[tiktoks-i-enjoyed]

[etcstims]

little snakes sips | source

[malibuklaus]

[galadriel1010]

Sometimes you get a brief glimpse into the American worldview and decide that you don't want to know.

[transcyberism]

I cannot stress enough that this meme is entirely literal. there's no reference or subtext you don't know. these are simply the objectively most popular works of art from each denomination.