simpin time

he/they, transmasc, certified ipad kid

[johnnycrass]

timeless

[30-minute-memes]

[littledeludeddupes]

those snakes are not fighting they are fucking. im very sorry

[itwashotwestayedinthewater]

while two snakes FUCK to the death

[eruditionanimaladoration]

That dog looking at the snakes like why you gotta do that while I’m eating

[gelana78]

Metal as snakes fucking.

[thedurvin]

[pansyfemme]

never give up on your dreams. you can always be a bigger faggot if you just believe in yourself

[iapislazuli]

idk what traumatized or mentally ill person needs to hear this but dreams (especially the really disturbing ones you dont want to talk about to anybody) arent some deep peek into your psyche or a sign of your True Desires or whatever theyre quite literally your brain making fruit salad with whatever it can find on the shelf. just putting all that shit in a blender and hitting obliterate. its fine, youre fine, youre not a weirdo for it

[iapislazuli]

Actually forget what I said. This dream is more important than anything

[msburgundy-but-worser-deactivat]

whoever said diamonds are a girl's best friend clearly has never met ibuprofen

[luimnigh]

Actually literally accurate. The song originates in the 1949 musical Gentlemen Prefer Blondes, while ibuprofen was invented in 1961.

[aru]

Tumblr Code.

[geekishchic]

If I ever see any of you in public, the code is “I like your shoelaces”

that way we know we’re from tumblr without revealing anything

I’m just going to say this to strangers until i find a tumblr person

must keep reblogering!! Im going to be so suspicious if any one tells me this now!

Remember the answer is: I stole them from the president.

always reblog tumblr identification

[hobbinch]

This is an absolute tumblr relic. I feel like an archaeologist right now. This is incredible that this is on my dash.

[heritageposts]

date of origin: 2nd of july, 2012.

[blingblingboy-kinnie]

Bro what it’s the second of July 2020. Happy 8th anniversary of this classic tumblr post!!!!

[dduane]

And now its 10th. Yay!

[gallusrostromegalus]

Oh, just in time for all the twitter and reddit refugees!

[shinolavolume1-deactivated20240]

[cubewaano]

when i liked this post it brought up the app store page for solitaire

[midiport]

took 2 edibles and wound up on the page of a schizophrenic man with a shit kink doing the sketchiest electrical experiments ive seen in months using license plates embued with the power of white girl pussy

[midiport]

[allsadnshit]

Love you guys it's ok to be lonely and sort of feel like you're in your loser era lol the ups and downs are proof we are alive and not just coasting

[ublock-origin]

[yuri-alexseygaybitch]

RuPaul is an asshole but this moment where he basically claimed ownership of Jimmy Fallon's soul for a solid five seconds is still imo the absolute funniest shit that's ever been broadcast on TV

[yuri-alexseygaybitch]

I've only seen the expressions that pass on Jimmy Fallon's face in survivors of terrorist attacks and plane crashes. It's probably the only genuine emotion he's ever displayed on camera in his entire life. This is the closest we're ever going to get to someone casting Soul Trap in real life

[dankmemeuniversity]

[thetreeofliberty]

[theehorsepusssy]

[emotion-deluxe]

[hi-raethia]

underrated form of humor: just making shit up in past tense

[professionalchaoticdumbass]

[buddwyer]

not an excuse. you should have done something.

[animentality]

[pasta-is-magnificent]

[disgustinggf]

[eggtrolls]