it's been 84 years

[porterr-robinson]

[whitepeopletwitter]

How do you catch a hawk?!

[will-ferret]

[wombat-annihilator-deactivated2]

[nomehablen2]

like imagine if you’d never seen a dog and you saw a saint bernard and you were like, what’s that and then someone was like, thats a dog. and then you saw a chihuahua and you were like ok whats that and they were like, that’s a dog. wouldn’t you feel lied to? wouldn’t you sense that something was amiss

[roaringstream]

You doin okay OP?

[cirrates]

im going to make a “never read homestuck” pride flag

[cirrates]

here it is! the colors are the characters’ theme colors inverted and the star represents being able to read zodiac posts normally :)

[blurrymango]

This is a flag I can fucking get behind!

[deacware-deactivated20190108]

Homestucks rise up

[kilekolache]

@sorellaperfratello

[neyruto]

Cowboys are witches and horses are their familiars

[istillfuckwithdemilovato-deacti]

guns are their wands and they only know one spell (bullet)

[sandersstudies]

I really want a villain who is a “MCDONALDS! MCDONALDS! MCDONALDS!” person facing a hero who is a “one black coffee” person.

[fob04]

Doofenshmirtz and Perry the platypus

[jinkies-binx]

i ran in front of the train with my horse for fun and now it’s in harveys house with me this is the best day ever

[jinkies-binx]

WAIT

[jinkies-binx]

theres a

Horse

LOOSE

IN THE HOSPITAL

[birdrhetorics]

my great-grandfather had to leave italy in the 20′s because he hit a fascist with a tuba, so if you think I am going to take this sitting down you are going to have to catch these hands and also this tuba

[bartok-not-bartalk]

Fun story my Great Great Grandma left Germany in the 1920s because she had family in the US and could get citizenship pretty easily and once she was over in the US she then smuggled over 15 jewish families out by forging family documents so now my aunts are currently in the process of trying to tell the real ones from the fake ones because my great gran just died and there are legally over 100 surviving descendants but we know that math is a lil screwy.

[jedda-martele]

Sometimes a family is you, your kids, your grandkids, your great grandkids, and the 15 Jewish families you helped smuggle out of Nazi Germany.

[hugealienpie]

And your tuba

[tybalt-tisk]

About an hour ago, I was in Walmart looking for my conditioner because today is wash day for my hair. As I’m looking for my product, this older white lady approaches me and she says, “Excuse me, miss. Please don’t be offended by this.” And usually when white people tell me not to be offended, 9 times out of 10, whatever they are about to say is going to be offensive af.

Anyway, she follows it up with, “My husband and I just recently won our custody battle with our foster daughter and she means the world to us. She’s a beautiful African American girl and her hair looks a lot like yours. But I’m afraid because I don’t know what to do with her hair. It’s a lot different from mines and our other children and we are at a total loss. I’ve tried looking up the YouTube videos and my husband went to the braiding shops so they can teach him how to properly braid her hair, but he’s still pretty new and it will be a while before he gets used to it. Do you have any tips you can give me? If you don’t have the time, it’s okay, really! I just needed a little advice because I want her to look beautiful.”

Y’all. swear I almost started crying on aisle 6. So for the last 30 minutes, I spent my time talking to her and what products to use and how to properly detangle and comb her hair with the proper tools and what not to do with natural hair. And I showed her a bunch of easier to follow natural hair tutorials on YouTube and saved them for her. (I also had to create a YouTube account for her so she could save it for later.) but omfg, she was so sweet, and I could tell that she listened to every single thing I had to say and she took little notes on her little notepad.

And what really filled my heart was the fact that her husband actually taking classes from African braiding shops. And she showed me a picture of him wearing a little sweater vest and loafers in a little shop surrounded by beautiful black women showing him how to braid black hair and even the lady he’s braiding on is guiding his hands. And omfg. Bless these old white people and their black daughter who I know have new loving parents because they are willing to step out of their comfort zone just to make her feel and look beautiful.

I really hope our paths cross again one day, Mrs Cicilia. 💖💕

[prideprejudce]

tbh this is proof that social media has completely ruined my sense of humor like i could go see a stand up comedian live and not laugh as hard as i did from reading this one fucking tweet

[route80s-deactivated20191222]

[malopeach]

things i like about this post: 1. mom checked if they took their meds, which is sweet 2. mom is cool with weed 3. mom knows which vocaloid is len, and put the joint on him like a hat or some shit, which is absolutely fucking hilarious to me

[route80s-deactivated20191222]

this is literally the only person who reblogged weed len who really appreciated the entire post thank you @tipsybandit

[shangheists]

4. len is dabbing

[saccharinescorpion]

appreciation post for these random fishermen in Moana

cute

perfectly convey the EXACT emotion you feel when two people you know well but don’t know “well” get into a family argument in front of you

[prokopetz]

“Character who looks dangerous but is actually harmless” and “character who looks harmless but is actually dangerous” are both well and good, but consider: character who looks dangerous, and actually is, but for a completely different reason than they look like they should be.

[prokopetz]

And no, I don’t mean like “guy who wears robes with a water motif is actually a fire wizard”. I mean like “seven-foot-tall mountain of gleaming muscle with sword the size of a surfboard strapped to his back is actually the Nine Realms’ most feared lawyer”.

[kingofbeartraps]

Hiram McDaniels, a nine headed dragon wanted for insurance fraud.

[celebsarchive]

[psychesandsexdrives-deactivated]

Let me tell you a fucking thing about costume design. That’s some in depth, difficult shit to learn. And the fact that this goddess can ramble this shit off the cuff means she knows her shit. ELLE WOODS IS A GODAMNED GENIUS AND IT’s NOT A STRETCH TO BELIEVE SHE GOT INTO HARVARD LAW MMMK?

[katecod]

FUCK YEAH ELLE WOODS OR DIE

[alimarko]

this movie is literally about an attractive woman who loves to party having to prove over and over again that she’s also intelligent and hard-working to those who judge her based on her looks (who also empowers and fights for other women, and fosters unlikely friendships instead of engaging in girl hate) and if you don’t think that’s some great feminist shit then I don’t know what your problem is

[lilyskinned]

Let’s not forget that in the end when the guy wants her again, she turns him down because she knows she deserves better.

[zagreus]

if you c*nsor anything in a post you are l*gally required to put all of the omitted v*wels at the end as a footn*te

*eeoo

[doctress]

Okay th*n. *f you’r* sure about th*s. 

Old Macd*nald had a farm.  

*eieio

[zagreus]

i’m going to shatter you like glass

[sagihairius]

i was taking this families order and the dad needed a second to decide so i was chatting with his kids and i was like “oooh are you guys twins” and then a voice from under the table went “YOURE CLOSE MAAM” then A THIRD KID popped up and did some karate moves at me and the dad just looked so tired

so yeah i met identical triplets today

[dragon-in-a-fez]

this is the only correct way to handle being an identical triplet

[andreii-tarkovsky]

i can’t believe ash ketchum got assassinated in the very first episode