lily :3

she/her | 21 | bi | memes and multifandom stuff

[creepymutelilbugger]

fearsome fangs friday!!!!!!!!!! bite everyone

[feldfrog]

Children would be so jealous if they knew how many stickers we have in dive bar bathrooms

[cheaphalloweencostume]

my least favorite literary smut turn of phrase is when a guy is like “im gonna ruin this pussy” “im gonna wreck this pussy for anyone else” like stop.. thats not yours…!

[goofda]

“Imma destroy that pussy” my friend 😔

[falsedetective]

cake is such an underappreciated band. i can’t believe we brought back low rise flare jeans before we brought back cake in the top 40

[falsedetective]

i’m just saying cake’s music would be widely regarded as so sexy if it wasn’t for all the mariachi horns and vibraslap and the vocalist didn’t always sound like he was explaining his suicide plans to a gun store clerk in sacramento. the world wasn’t ready for them

[digital-morganism-deactivated20]

The fact that it sounds like a dispassionate reading of a terrorist manifesto is a feature

[bgm05]

i think the angriest ive ever made someone on reddit was when they used an emoji while arguing and i said "What is this tiny yellow picture"

[weaver-z]

It's hilarious to me that Al Capone was an amazing tipper. I get why it took so long to catch him.

[weaver-z]

Me and the other caddies watching Al Capone beat a guy to death with a golf club after he gave each of us the 2022 equivalent of $1600

[podcastwizard]

LIKES TO CHARGE REBLOGS TO CAST

[the-goddess-of-annoying]

you people aren't CASTING

[the-goddess-of-annoying]

NO

[teashoesandhair]

I'm in a little local cafe and the women behind the counter started griping to each other, "Oh Christ, Stephen's back again," "It's him, is it? I thought he'd stopped coming," "It's definitely him, look, it's bloody Stephen on a Thursday morning," "Do you want me to get rid of him or are you going to do it?" and so I was peering outside, trying to spot this nightmare customer, this pestilence of a person, this pox upon the cafe trade, and then one of the women from behind the counter ran outside, clapping two trays together loudly and yelling "GET OUT OF IT, STEPHEN!" and it turns out that Stephen is an absolutely gigantic fuck-off seagull who hangs around outside, menacing people for crumbs

[freakoutgirl]

"all you ever do is complain" that's not true. I also resent.

[freakoutgirl]

and love..........

[chillyfeetsteak]

there should be more options than suffering via employment and suffering via unemployment

[damazcuz]

(Smiling fondly at nothing) puppy music school..... puppy music school.

[damazcuz]

Even puppy can learn music.

[damazcuz]

Literally it's puppy music school.

[woodsdyke]

im swimming at the lake and accidentally kicked a fish. this has never happened in my many years of swimming. sorry man

[mevil]

my beautiful wife that is scared of a closed window at night

[slitherpunk]

[shoelifts-blog]

[red-garden]

“Do dishes” and “take out trash” both require the use of a spell slot, vs “use phone” is a cantrip, and brother, I am a level one wizard

[5weekdays]

my mom was trying to chew through some really tough steak and she turned to me and said “just call me The Gnawer.” she would do numbers here

[5weekdays]

[5weekdays]

she told me she doesn't remember saying this. quote, "must have been steak-induced hysteria"

[5weekdays]

happy mother's day to this crazy broad

[fini-mun]

Was working on a panel and then suddenly I decided to live vicariously through Tails and have him address the important things in life.