Home
Send in requests!
Browse all of my AUs!
(These prompts are longer than usual, but i got a bit carried away)
“I didn’t know that you cared this much about me.”
“Of course I fucking care. You think I WANT to spend every single second of every day thinking about what I did wrong, what I could’ve done differently if I didn’t care?”
You were the best thing and worst thing that’s ever happened to me.
Everytime I think I’ve gotten over you, everytime I think I’ve made the smallest bit of progress or that I can live without you - I see someone that looks like you or hear a song that you used to love and my heart breaks all over again.
I keep going to the same places that we used to go to. I don’t even need to go there but I somehow think that if I go to the same memorable places that somehow, it won’t be now anymore. Somehow, it’ll be then and I’ll see you turn the corner with a huge grin on your face like none of this ever happened.
Please don’t do this, I made a mistake. I still love you.
Where was this? Where was this three months ago? When I was crying over you, wondering where I went wrong, hating myself for laughing at that joke or texting you first or ever EVER sharing my true feelings for you? I have wasted MONTHS and when I finally managed to not breakdown when I see you, you tell me you love me? No. Not a chance.
People always say that love is supposed to easy, but people never tell you that unloving someone will be the hardest thing you’ll ever do.
“How can you stand there and tell me that all you ever did was love me? So, when we fought and cried and screamed that we hated each other so that everyone could hear - that was love? The few moments of “love” between us was only when we were too tired to fight anymore - I’m tired of being tired all the time.”
I can’t keep forgiving you because you keep building up my trust and then tearing it down all over again - sorry can’t fix months of misplaced trust and belief in a person that can’t see when they’ve made a mistake.
I know you’re devastated, I know you’re barely holding yourself together, I know you’re broken - but it’s not my job to fix you. I no longer feel like I’m in a relationship, I simply feel like the glue that’s holding all this together - I can’t do this anymore.
What happened to the person who used to laugh at silly puns with me? What happened to the person who used to enjoy talking to me, opened up to me, let me into their life? What happened to the person that I fell in love with?
I don’t even recognise you anymore.
I thought that if I changed just little things about myself that I could fit into your life, be the person that you can fall in love with - but every single time, you picked them over me. I kept changing and changing to the point where I don’t even know who I am anymore.
“I told you I’m sorry a million times, what do you want from me?”
“What do I want? I wanted you to realise what you were doing while you were doing it, I wanted you to stop yourself, I wanted you to not ever tell me you loved me when you knew that it’d break my heart when you decided that one night was worth throwing away our entire relationship.”
Perhaps, things would’ve worked out differently if I’d expressed my feelings earlier. If I’d told you how I felt from the beginning and opened myself up to you more rather than being scared of everything going wrong. But I might not ever know - because that was then and this is now. You’re with them and there’s not a fucking thing I can do about it.
We were young, we were stupid, we were in love. Now we’re older, we’re smarter and we can’t even look at each other anymore.
It would be so easy to say I’m sorry and start this all over again with you, go back to the days when we were in love and we had no problems. But I know, you know that if we did that, the cracks would just start to appear again and we’d be right back where we started.
I’d have my heart broken all over again if it meant that I could have those first six months with you - those were the best months of my life.
Yes, I said that I’d always save a part of my heart for you. But soon, my heart no longer yearned out for you every second, it no longer missed you everytime I was reminded of you, it no longer broke down at the sight of you. I loved you then but the part of my heart that was reserved for you no longer beats.