On Today's Episode of Fuck Me for Being Courteous in Public
I held a door open for someone, as it was swinging shut in their face
- The woman, behind me, then proceeded to stare at me, as I'm alwardly holding the door, in a loud obnoxious voice exclaim "EWW no, I'm not helpless weirdo.."
- I responded with "ok...didn't say you were, just trying to be polite..." before I could even defend myself, she then cuts me off
Rolls her eyes *🙄😒 and says in an even louder voice "You're what's wrong with men"
Now...I don't make a mountain out of non-issues, but as someone who's worked hard to be a good human to others, and has come from a past where I was abused, violated and cheated on...I could have turned out way worse.. I've done a lot of work to understand my place in society, and show respect to others...so you can imagine the heat of the spotlight I felt, being in this scenario
I'm now beet red, which for context is very rare as I'm brown and it means my face was completely flushed from anxiety. Even though I proceeded in to the Cafe, my anxiousness then climbed higher because people who didn't understand the context, and just heard yelling, then started glancing at me, one person glared.
The woman then , about 4 people behind me in line, as I'm looking at the bagels , let's out one my verbal scoff as I now sweatingly try to come out of my disassociative state to order my one thing I was looking forward to this evening....but it came to the point where I felt so uncomfortable , and left to go to a different café location. I felt robbed of my social right to space.
But if I had replied back, who's to say I wouldn't have been seen as aggressive? I felt completely like I had been spat at.
1) I do not have motives, other than manners, if I hold a door open for someone...so if this person had some negative experience with someone else, not my problem.
2) Most people I know, men and women, are courteous people. If you fall outside of this behavior, it makes me think you just aren't fit for a social setting
3) Everywhere left right and center nowadays, all I see on social media is how toxic men are, how men aren't needed, men are this, men are that...but if, as a man who's generally well natured and simply respectful as a human, is going to be publicly LYNCHED over a fuckin door ? Then no wonder why droves of us are now choosing to keep to ourselves.
I grew up under my baba ( my father ) who was a protector, kind, gentle to others and taught respect to women. A man who could have been completely crippled by being a child of the Lebanese conflict, he decided to raise me and my brothers and sisters, to honor our mother first...
I can't imagine a man like that, being in my place during an incident like this. It would break my heart. The idea here being, even though I felt like shit for a while, imagine what that kind of defamatory, vulgar treatment could do to a man who's got a more fragile mental state.
We wonder why male su***de statistics climb?
Absolutely ridiculous behavior and I've never felt so humiliated. Luckily, I was able to recover my evening a bit with headphones and music, but that was a hugely disappointing experience and I think some women, have got some serious fucking issues they are projecting into the world, only to weaponize them and use them to make men feel like they're freaks .
Absolutely vile lack of emotional maturity, and I hope nobody else , has to experience what I did.