#breakup advice

[thesirensense]

Your self respect has to be greater than your desire to be loved.

[the-wanderer]

[glowettee]

hey my favourite hoe!!!

i got some really bad news..

my girlfriend just broke up with me and im finding it really hard to cope with. do you have any tips?? I could really use any right now mwah mwah kiss kiss, xoxo emily

hey emily 💔

first of all, i’m wrapping you up in the biggest blanket hug ever. breakups feel like someone has yanked the floor out from under you, and you’re just… floating in the freefall. there’s no sugarcoating it, it sucks, and you’re allowed to say it sucks without trying to immediately “find the lesson” or “be grateful for the memories.” right now, your job isn’t to be inspirational. your job is to just survive the day.

⋆.ೃ࿔:･ surviving the first wave ･:ೃ.⋆ your brain is probably doing that thing where it keeps replaying moments... the good ones, the bad ones, all tangled together, and each one feels like a punch. this is normal. your brain’s trying to make sense of something it doesn’t want to accept yet. so, you need to stop feeding it extra material. that means muting her on socials, tucking away pictures, hiding her sweatshirt at the back of the closet. not because you’re erasing her, but because you’re protecting you. it’s like stopping the bleeding before you can even think about healing.

⋆.ೃ࿔:･ feeling without drowning ･:ೃ.⋆ the hardest part is letting yourself feel without letting it swallow you whole. when you start spiraling, set a timer for 10 minutes. let yourself cry, scream into a pillow, write an unhinged note in your phone about how much she hurt you, whatever. when the timer goes off, you do something physical to pull yourself out, wash your face with cold water, step outside, stretch until your muscles ache a little. grief is a wave. you don’t stop it from coming, but you can keep yourself from being dragged under every time.

⋆.ೃ࿔:･ stop romanticizing the version of her in your head ･:ೃ.⋆ i know you keep thinking about how she laughed that one time, or the way she looked at you when you were half-asleep. but here’s the thing... that girl doesn’t exist anymore. maybe she never did, at least not fully. you were in love with a whole version of her that’s now gone, and the person standing here in the breakup aftermath isn’t the one you built a life in your mind with. it’s brutal, but the quicker you stop reaching for her shadow, the sooner you can start holding your own hand instead.

⋆.ೃ࿔:･ make “nexts” instead of “nevers” ･:ೃ.⋆ people always say “you’ll love again,” which is true but annoyingly vague. so don’t focus on the forever, focus on the next. the next new café you’ll go to without thinking of her. the next song you’ll find that makes you feel something that isn’t grief. the next inside joke you’ll make with someone new. little nexts stack into a life that feels yours again.

⋆.ೃ࿔:･ create tiny rituals just for you ･:ೃ.⋆ when your relationship ends, all the small shared routines vanish, the good morning texts, the tv show you watched together, even the way you grocery shopped. that absence is loud. so you need to fill it with your noise. start a silly playlist you add to every morning. light a candle at night when you’re getting ready for bed. make sunday mornings your “slow breakfast and no phone” day. the point isn’t distraction, it’s proof that life still has sweetness even when your heart is bruised.

⋆.ೃ࿔:･ don’t rush the rebuild ･:ೃ.⋆ you’re going to have days you feel okay, and then suddenly one tiny thing will knock the wind out of you. this doesn’t mean you’re “regressing” or “failing” at moving on. healing isn’t a straight staircase, it’s a messy map with loops, pauses, and random bursts forward. be gentle with the girl who wakes up crying. she’s also the girl who will one day laugh so hard she forgets she was ever this sad.

so for now, eat something, even if it’s just toast. text a friend “i’m sad” and let them send you memes. wear something soft. breathe through it. you are not stuck here forever, i promise.

xoxo, mindy 🤍

[emptyhour]

people will come and go in your life. here's what one person taught me.

k:

being in a relationship shouldn't take away your sense of self or your own life. that person is not your entire life.

loving someone won't make them choose recovery, nor can you force them to choose recovery. they have to choose it themselves. being in a relationship doesn't mean becoming that person's 24/7 therapist.

you deserve better. i deserved better than being hid by her family because she wasn't out yet. i deserved to be loved loudly and proudly.

don't give 80% only to get 20% in return. match the person's energy.

breakups can happen even if you still love each other.

breakups will always happen, it's not the end of the world. i thought i couldn't live without her, let alone breathe, but i can (even though it's painful).

your identity is not tied to the person you're in a relationship with. you should be able to be in a relationship AND have your own identity. if you lose your identity, then get out of that relationship.

you can't be in a lasting relationship for someone who cannot read/act your love language. you can't teach someone to read you when they're not even interested in learning your signals.

don't chase after people that let you go, even if they didn't want to let you go. just because they didn't want to doesn't mean you chase them--in the end, they did let you go.

you deserve someone who will go out of their way to love you loudly (or in a way that you appreciate/desire).

~ emptyhour

[sks-wa-wa-wa]

tumblr i need advice

tw underneath this for a really really bad break up

there's a friend of mine whose ex is like.. being really awful. the breakup was bad. a lot of us in the group were like "hey this person is really abusive. telling you they're going to k1!! themself if you break up with them is not okay. being jealous and bitchy and saying you're cheating on them because you are being lightly affectionate with your friends and spending time with us is not okay." our friend group was split for a bit about it (though it's back together now, thankfully).

literally they were spamming on our friend's instagram, discord, text messages, and even fucking HONKAI STAR RAIL messages. it was fucking awful. well the ex is a mod in a few twitch places and is friends with a lot of the others in that same community. they got our friend banned from their comfort streamer's server as well as a few others. they're also starting to interact in spaces they said they hated before, all places our friend was part of and is now scared to talk in because they are scared of getting banned from somewhere else.

and today they got someone else from our group banned from another space because she accidentally did something that the ex saw as an insult. that friend has been in that community since 2023. we're trying to get her back in by saying it was an accident but like.. yeah that's still not okay.

does anyone have any ideas what to do? like.. it's gotten to a point where our friend is scared to go on the internet at all other than in places they know their ex isn't in.

[auttumnleafs]

I get a full butt and girls balls waxing after every breakup. I really reccomend it.

How the hell am i supposed to be sad when it feels like my balls are being opened like an envelope.

This is also several dbt skills like opposite action, alternate rebellion, the one where you hold an ice cube in your hand, cause it hurts but it doesn't do long term damage.

Get your balls waxed.

[imwritingnonsense]

Y'all I need advice so help would be appreciated.

Theres this guy. We'll call him Alex. Alex and I were really good friends for a few months and I really like having him as a friend. Then he asked me out. I thought I was agreeing to a single double bate with some friends to a state fair, not a relationship. From that day forward he's been super clingy, calling me his GF, and all sorts else. Its been 4 months. I fucked up cause I've kind of led him on by not saying much against it. He always says we're gonna get married and have kids. I tell him to slow down im only 21, I can barely drink legally. He's great. He really is. He is sweet, responsible, respectful, funny and fun to be around, he has a great family who is kind to me. The only con is that he is super Christian and MAGA while im the opposite. For months I thought I would eventually feel the same about him but he just feels like a friend, nothing more.

We are going to different colleges now but he calls me constantly. I need a way to gently break up with him without totally breaking him. He always says Im the love of his life. How do I do this?

[conscious-love]

Good relationships feel good. They feel right. They don’t hurt.

Michelle Obama