#d&d jokes

[furry-fey]

that's what they call my cumshots

[whoreocookiesnmilk]

If the sex doesn't feel like rolling a Nat 20, I don't want it.

[cat-cosplay]

"The faintly lit passage ends in a crimson curtain behind which the sound of instrumental music flows faintly. Peaking around the curtain it appears to be a group of orc bards."

"Don't..."

"You've stumbled upon an Orchestra."

[comicbookhyperfixationtime]

POV The DM Nerfs Your Racial Ability

Look I get unlimited Misty Step is kind of absurd but Brian, Rachel and Megan all get flight and Kitty has temporary immunity to all damage types except psychic why does only Kurt have to worry about power scaling?!

[twilightstarr-zinnia]

Alhaitham is that character with a player who multiclassed and took feats just to give him proficiency in every skill.

[captainchibale]

How D&D classes dodge attacks:

Wizard: Shield spell

Bard: Cutting words

Ranger: Dexterously sidesteps

Rogue: Already gone

Paladin: Blocks with a shield

Barbarian: Takes the hit and grins menacingly

[sammileedavis]

You’re your worst critic

[devilishdm]

When your party doesn’t want to go along with your elaborate scheme to trick the guards through theatrics