I need people to realize ASAP that fetishizing trans women and fem(me)s is NOT SUPPORT! If you can never think of anything "kind" or "supportive" to say about us that's not sexual, or that can't be turned sexual in a hot second, I don't like or trust you.
If it always comes back around to sex and looks and the like? 8/10 times, I just have to poke around the barest bit and the fact you don't actually see us as people but only living sex dolls that you lash out at the moment we "ruin your fantasy" by existing as ourselves in a way you don't like. If we demand to be given respect, and or our basic human rights, etcetera. It just comes pouring out!
Editing to add, do you know what else is not actually support but fetishization? Telling an intersex person you wish you were intersex, and or that you are an intersex ally because you wish you were, on top of the obvious "god intersex people are so hot you're the perfect human" schtick. That is not support, not being an ally, not positivity. It is dehumanizing and fetishizing, downplaying our struggles.
If your support and advocacy for us, hell for any group really, but especially transfems (perisex and intersex) because we seem to be the main target of this crap always comes back around to what you think we do/can do for you? And or to sex? It is not support, not being an ally, not positivity. It is dehumanizing and fetishizing, downplaying our struggles. But you don't care about our well-being, do you? Unless we service you in some manner, you don't give a damn or the damn you do give is miniscule and secondary to yourself, to your needs and wants is that so? Our personhood offends you, because then we aren't of service to you, yeah? Become a better person or shut up.
That addition to this post was brought to you by someone telling me essentially exactly all of that, with the slight change of saying that "especially intersex women" are hot and "the perfect human." Die.
