Apr 30
Red Hood caught off guard by one Red Robin
Ko-fi
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Red Hood caught off guard by one Red Robin
Ko-fi
shark tank ☉ for the ask game: would loveeee to see ur take on dicktim during the prodigal son arc! tim being the robin to dick's batman after bruce not picking dick the first time around just has so much angst and potential and im really trying to push my dicktim agenda this year i think they deserve to be very Weird about each other
“You want me to be your Robin?” Tim cautiously questioned Dick. Dick gave him a half hearted nod. Tim glanced over his shoulder toward the med bay where Bruce rested with Alfred tending to him diligently. A broken back had put the big bad Bat out of commission.
“Tim… I wouldn’t ask this from anyone else.” Dick spoke softly, his fingertips reaching out to brush Tim’s hand. “I don’t know how to be Batman, not like B does. You though, you do.”
Tim gnawed on his lower lip, his eyes traveling down to Dick’s hand as it wrapped around Tim’s wrist pulling him closer. His sneakers squeaked on the metal floor until he was fully between Dick’s open legs. Tim’s knees knocked Dick’s thighs as he shifted, refusing eye contact. “I don’t know. I’ve turned Jason down so man-”
“I’m not Jason!” Dick hissed his hands trailing up to Tim’s waist. “You are the best detective in this cave. We both know B would be lost without you. Tim, please. I need you.” The heat behind the word sent a shiver down Tim’s spine.
Dick stood pressing his front to Tim's, his arms wrapping fully around Tim’s waist. His lips grazed Tim’s forehead, nose nuzzling Tim’s cheek. Tim knew if he dared turn his head their lips would touch. “Dick…”
Finally tipping his head back blue clashed with blue. Tim noted Dick’s pupils started to dilate. A large hand came up and cupped his cheek, Tim tried to take a step back but Dick refused to let go. The arm around his waist tightened, the hand by his face raked into his hair.
“You’re the perfect Robin Tim, you have no idea. There's a reason Jason wants you so bad. Why B has refused to let you go all these years. Come on baby bird… don’t you love me?”
Tears stung Tim’s eyes and he sucked in his lip to stop the trembling. He had heard the same speech from Jason. It was ingrained in his brain from Bruce, the older man’s words buried deep into his heart. Tim had quickly learned there were a certain set of responsibilities that came with wearing the R on his chest. A heavier weight than that of the Bat that would soon be stretched across Dick’s chest.
Dick’s lips ghosted Tim’s as he spoke, “I’ll be gentler than him, I promise.”
Sighing Tim closed the short gap, his fists gripping Dick's shirt between his fingers. He knew he shouldn't, but Dick was Tim's first crush, his first longing. Tim really did love the eldest Robin loved Dick more than anyone.
The situation may not be ideal but nothing ever was in their life. "So is that a yes?" Dick grinned pressing another kiss to Tim's lips. Tim eagerly nodded in response.
Batman: So this fountain makes wishes come true ?
Superman: So it seems
Red Robin: I see
Nightwing: ...
Red Hood: ...
Wonder Woman walks towards the group: Everything allright Batman ?
Batman holding all 4 men back with pure force: Never better
Jason : *chillin on his bed/reading a magazine*
Tim : *dramatically storms into Jason’s room*
Jason : *throws his magazine*
Jason : I WASN’T READING ABOUT RYAN REYNOLDS ABS--i mean hey bro, what’s up, what can I do ya for ?
Tim : . . .
Jason :
Tim : Kon broke up with me
Jason :
Tim :
Jason : alright. where’s my AK--
Tim : no. it’s okay. let him go ahead and date cAsSiE if that’s who he’s into
Jason :yer really not makin’ this any easier
Tim : . . .ya know, I remember when Steph and I broke up. .
Jason : are you gonna help me find my AK or not ?
Tim : *sits on Jay’s bed* . . .she cut her hair right after. . .
Jason : *still looking for his AK* hm, nope, not under the bed. . .
Tim : maybe I should do that
Jason : do what ? cut some bangs ? I mean, you gotta cute face Timmers, dont get me wrong, but bangs ? nah, you cant pull that shit off
Tim : yeah you’re right. . .oh, I GOT IT ! im gonna pierce my ear !!
Jason : just the one ?
Tim : well. . .why not ?
Jason : i dunno, kinda 90′ish. why not both ?
Tim : lets just start with the one
Tim : *gets up* alright ! take me to the nearest place of body defilement before I loose my nerve !
Jason : *smirking* why ? when I got a needle right here. . . .
*20 minutes later*
Dick : *walking down the hallway past the bathroom*
Jason : *from behind the bathroom door* STOP MOVING !
Tim : IT HURTS !
Jason : i HAVEN’T EVEN STUCK IT IN YET--
Tim : BUT I FEEL SOMETHING POKING INSIDE--!!
Jason : just breathe, okay ? relax. . .THEN i’ll SHOVE it in !
Tim : do 1, 2, 3 first . . .
Jason : 1, 2, 3 ?? that’s for babies. JUST GRIT YER FUCKIN’ TEETH AND TAKE IT LIKE A MAN LIKE I DID MY FIRST TIME !
Tim : WAIT ! NO ! I CHANGED MY MIND, I JUST WANT KON BACK-- !
Jason : TOO LATE ! HERE IT COMES--!!!
Dick : *breaks down the bathroom door*
Dick : *grabbing Jason*
Jason : WHAT THE FUCK DICK !
Dick : how DARE you try to take Timmer’s INNOCENCE !
Tim : NO ! YOU’VE GOT IT ALL WRONG !
Jason : and if you think for a hot SECOND that THIS ONE’S a VIRGIN then YOU’VE GOT ANOTHER THING COMIN’--!
Alfred : *casually walking past the broken bathroom door with fresh laundry*
Batgirls’ Favorite Mentor
Babs & Batfam || Babs & Cass || Babs & Steph || implied DickBabs || Implied JayTim || Read on Ao3 || Happy Birthday, Barbara Gordon! ❤
<< A sequel to last year’s “Dick’s Favorite Person”
~*~
After Barbara's birthday dinner, Tim, Cass and Steph dragged everyone down to the Wayne Manor home theater to watch movies-- 'everyone' including Bruce, Damian, and her father, all three of whom seemed uncomfortable at the prospect of spending the evening participating in normal family bonding activities rather than heading back out into the night to fight crime, even if they couldn't acknowledge that they all three shared that discomfort.
(She was pretty sure her father knew everything--that she had been Batgirl, that Bruce was Batman, and about all the Robins and succeeding Batgirls--or at least suspected most of it, and had for a long time now, but he would never admit as much in order to maintain his plausible deniability).
Barbara struggled to contain her amusement every time she glanced over at them sitting side-by-side, stiff and awkward, on the couch. Oh, the rich irony.
While Steph, Tim and Cass convinced her to pick out a few movies for the family to watch, Dick and Jason helped Alfred clean up from dinner and make some popcorn, and then they escorted the grandfatherly man down to join the little party as well. Barbara picked the Ghostbusters series--including the new reboot film--for their watch party, feeling a little pre-halloween excitement for the first time in a long time, thanks to her good mood.
Her father stayed through the first film--it was something special having her father on one side of her on the big sectional couch, Dick on her other side, and the rest of her chosen family around her, laughing and making witty remarks about the movie--and then he excused himself.
Bruce, Damian, and Alfred persevered through the second, after which Bruce excused himself to "check on an ongoing case"--Barbara knew there was no ongoing case, but she was sure Bruce would also mind his manners around the Birds of Prey, seeing as he had promised her he was fine with them taking over for the night, so she let it slide--and Damian followed, muttering excuses of helping his father.
Alfred sighed and apologized to her, saying he should probably go down and ensure they didn't get up to too much mischief. His tone and the way he phrased it made Barbara giggle and she kissed him on the cheek with a quiet thank you for the dinner and everything else before letting him leave.
That left Barbara, Steph, Cass, Tim, Jason and Dick to watch the reboot film together, and Barbara had to say she enjoyed the extra quality time with her Robins and Batgirls. After that Tim, Jason and Dick also took their leave.
From the sounds of it Jason planned to drag Tim back to their apartment where he had apparently made and hidden extra portions of the mocha frosting used on the cake he gave her earlier and had some creative ideas about where to apply it only to lick it off again--Jason kept his tone low, but Barbara, being Barbara, overheard anyway. She smirked, but also blushed, making a note to avoid watching the surveillance video records for their apartment during these next couple of hours unless it became absolutely necessary.
Dick, blissfully oblivious of Tim and Jason’s plans, wandered off after them, probably headed up to bed or down to the cave to train for a bit before turning in.
After the boys left, Steph and Cass got even more excited and energetic, pulling out nail polish, face masks, and makeup. Barbara chortled at the idea of them doing makeovers and manicures like teenaged girls at a sleepover, but she went along with it with grace. Despite being Batgirls, the three of them weren't overly feminine, but every now and then it was fun to do some normal girl stuff and laugh together at how silly some of it felt.
They put the ridiculous Halle Berry Catwoman movie on in the background--Selina hadn't been overly impressed with that cinematic take on her persona, but Steph vehemently claimed that Halle Berry, acting in that role, had been a crucial part of her gay awakening--and then they did facials and manicures while they talked about boys--not boys in general, and definitely not daydreaming over dating them, but specifically the batboys, commiserating long and loudly over how ridiculous they could be, particularly Bruce.
At a certain point, Steph began not so subtly steering the conversation toward something that was not yet apparent, but Barbara was the one who had taught Steph the finer points of redirection, so she would know, even if she hadn't spotted the end goal as of yet.
"Y'know," Stephanie said, "it's nice when the Birds of Prey come and help out around Gotham. They always do a good job and work well enough with the boys, too." She glanced over as Cass and gave her a pointed look. Cass grinned back at her and began nodding along to the words very deliberately.
"Yeah, that's true…" Barbara allowed cautiously, suppressing the urge to shake her head at their painfully-obvious non-verbal signaling. Their poor attempts to manipulate the conversation notwithstanding, she was curious to see where this was headed, at the very least.
"I mean you should totally ask them to come take over for a couple of days, sometime," Steph went on in a carefully casual tone as she finished the second coat of polish on the fingernails of Barbara's left hand. "Y'know? Maybe take a vacation? Get out of Gotham for a while?"
Barbara sighed and began waving the hand, encouraging the wet polish to dry. "I appreciate what you guys are trying to do," she replied, looking them each in the eye in turn, "but I just don't have the time, what with Halloween and then the holidays. This is such a busy time of year for the crazies--and even for the not-so-crazies--and Bruce will never-"
To her surprise, Cass crouched down right in front of her and cut her off, both with her patented Cassandra Cain stare and with the words, "Yes. But listen."
Barbara blinked, then nodded. Cass smiled slightly then looked up to Steph and nodded for her to continue.
Steph nodded back and dropped the faux-casual tone, saying, "It's already done, Babs. We asked every single Bird on the roster to come by during the second week of November, right after the Halloween crazy-fest and just before the holiday madness.
"Kara, Donna and Koriand'r agreed to rotate out to keep an eye on things from above, Cass convinced Bruce to let them all to bunk here at the manor-" Barbara's eyes boggled while Cass nodded smugly "-and all the boys are on board with the plan and ready to play nice. Cass and I will be here too, just to make sure everyone gets along." Cass cracked the knuckles of one hand and grinned, nodding ominously.
"So, you see, it's all settled," Stephanie finished, looking smug. "You just have to say yes."
Barbara blinked rapidly, struggling to process all the surprises that had just been dumped on her. "Wait… so…I get a choice? To say yes or not?"
Steph laughed. "Yes, Babs, of course; this our gift to you, not a mandated vacation! So what do you say?"
Barbara shook her head, not sure how to respond. "Look, even if I had the time, I haven't exactly saved up to, you know, do anything special or go anywhere...I wouldn't even know where to go..."
"Well, Dick said he would go with you, if you wanted some company," Stephanie said, "Or he would stay here to help hold down the fort if you prefer but, as for paying for the trip…"
Cass walked up to the double doors to the den, pushed them open a crack and stuck her head out into the hall. "Hey, Dick, get your dick in here."
Steph choked on air and then burst out laughing. Barbara couldn't help but grin, especially when Cass backed up far enough to allow an upset and confused Dick Grayson entry into their den of Batgirls.
"Cass, that uhhh…isn't how that saying goes…" he began slowly, looking at Steph and Barbara in alarm.
"She knows that," Steph replied with a smug smile. She shot Cass an appreciative look that Cass returned with a grin and a wink.
Dick simply shook his head and let it go. "So we're doing the gift now?" he asked, glancing at Barbara, but directing his words to Stephanie.
"Yes," Barbara replied, barely concealing her amusement at their 'sneaky' tactics--What had Dick done for an hour in the hall while waiting to be called back in again? Since when did Dick Grayson have the patience for subterfuge anyway?--"Steph and Cass just explained to me that I'm being sent on vacation-"
"If you want!" Steph blurted.
Barbara laughed out loud. "If I want, apparently, and that you've also volunteered to go with me." She raised an eyebrow and adopted a mischievous tone. "Is the part where you offer to be my personal cabana boy? Or to bring your police uniform and strip for me every night?"
Dick grinned. "No, but those aren't bad ideas." He sobered and went on, saying, "No, this is the part where I offer to fly you anywhere in the world--out of my own BPD savings--and give you the choice to go and explore on your own, or to take me along for the ride if you want someone to keep you company and have your back while you're on the road."
Barbara stared, feeling her eyes go misty. "Dick, I...wow. That's…Yeah, I'd really like that."
Dick's grin brightened into a genuine smile, and out of the corner of her eye she saw Stephanie fist pump and then fist bump Cassandra. Barbara thought about it for a few seconds and then said,
"The Italian Lakes."
Dick tilted his head questioningly. "In the Italian Alps?"
Barbara nodded decisively. "I know it will be chilly in November, but I want to go there. I've always wanted to see them and stay in one of the villas."
Dick laughed and nodded. "Like that one they used for the Naboo lake country in Star Wars Episode II?"
Barbara rolled her eyes but smiled. "Yes, you closeted-nerd, exactly like that."
"Consider it done," Dick replied without hesitation.
"Thank you," she replied sincerely, turning her gaze onto all three of them. "You all had to have talked about this extensively, probably weeks in advance, and done so much leg work to get everyone on the same page…" she narrowed her eyes, suddenly suspicious, "and you still managed to hide it from me of all people?!"
"Yes, from the all seeing Oracle," Steph laughed, grinning infuriatingly.
How even, Barbara mouthed, shaking her head incredulously.
"By only speaking in-person in electronics-free areas," Steph replied, smiling conspiratorially. "By passing each other coded notes and-"
"Smoke signals," Cass added, nodding sagely.
"And messenger pigeons, too, of course," Dick finished, his eyes sparkling with mirth.
Barbara shook her head at the three of them then shook a finger at one in particular. "Dick, you son of a bat, you lied to me," she accused, smiling broadly. "You totally had a gift all along and you led me on all evening!"
"Yeah," Dick admitted with a sigh, running a hand through his hair, "I didn't want to spoil the surprise, but it was sooooooo hard, I really wanted to give you something--anything--so much earlier..."
"I'm glad you didn't," Barbara cut in. "The surprises--both of them--were wonderful. Thank You." She looked Stephanie, then Cassandra in the eyes. "All of you. Really. This means a lot."
Steph swooped down to give her a hug. As soon as she straightened, Cass leaned down gracefully to give one of her own. Barbara squeezed each of them tightly in turn, trying desperately to relay the gratitude beyond words that she felt for their thoughtfulness as well as she could through the contact. The knowing smile Cass gave her as they separated told Barbara her unspoken message was received and understood.
"Only the best for the best mentor," Cass replied quietly.
Stephanie nodded. "We wouldn't be the Batgirls we were-" she glanced at Cass "-and are today if it weren't for you. You're the MVB forever."
Barbara frowned for a moment, then smiled. "Most Valuable Batgirl?"
Cass and Steph nodded and Dick nodded too, in the background.
"Forever," Cass repeated.
"Awwww, Batgirls…" Barbara cooed, feeling tears prick at the corners of her eyes. She motioned them back in and drew them into a tight group hug, all three of them slinging their arms around each other, laughing when their heads eventually clonked together. After a moment Barbara noticed Dick smiling fondly at the three of them from a discrete distance.
She raised her head and cleared her throat. "Okay, all non-Batgirls, please vacate the room. The official Batgirl spa night continues now."
Steph and Cass giggled but stepped away and busied themselves with rewinding the movie, giving Dick an opening to approach Babs before leaving once again. He stopped beside her chair, leaned down, and kissed her gently on the forehead, murmuring, "Happy Birthday, Babs."
She caught him by the chin and drew him down into a quick kiss, murmuring her thanks against his lips. He smiled, stood, then left quietly through the double doors.
To one side, Steph and Cass scrutinized bottles of nail polish with undeserved concentration, clearly trying to give Barbara and Dick some privacy. Barbara smiled.
"Okay, so, back to business. We’ve finished facials and fingernails, so...how about pedicures now?"
Steph and Cass blinked in surprise. "Are you sure?" Steph asked. She and Cass never made a big deal out of Barbara's paraplegia--often openly discussing it with Barbara as the situation required--but they'd also tried to avoid activities that would highlight her differences, such as pedicures.
"Yeah, I know, I wouldn't be able to feel it, but, you know, it's been such long time since my feet have had a chance to get fancy. It's my birthday, so…why not?" Barbara replied lightly, smiling slyly at them.
Slowly their faces brightened until Steph was beaming and Cass' eyes were reduced to delighted slivers.
"Absolutely!" "Of course!"
~*~
Alfred’s Favorite Barbara >>
If you’re still taking prompts please consider: himbo!Jason 😂
Thank you for writing in!
I think I probably went somewhere a little different than you wanted with this? I couldn’t really figure out a way to write Jason as a himbo that fits with my characterization of him, so I wrote him being duper out of it for other reasons. I hope this is okay!
—- Warning for mild language and mildly implied prior relationships—-
Stephanie watches Jason stumble around her small dorm room, disoriented and totally out of it. She is forever grateful that she has a single, but he’s making enough noise crashing into the walls that her neighbors might try and see what’s going on soon. Under her breath she curses that she’s the only one who was close enough to grab a heavily drugged and mildly concussed Red Hood off the streets before it became an issue.
“Jason, some on buddy, I need you to change into civvies. If my RA finds you here in costume she’s gonna think I’m into some really weird sex shit.”
Jason’s response is to just start stripping. Under other circumstances, Steph would feel little to no shame watching Jason change clothes. She’s seen it before and been encouraged too. But right now, it’s kind of sad. He’s managed to get off his jacket and shirt, but the laces on his boots are beyond his current skills. He looks up at her with the saddest puppy dog eyes she has ever seen.
“Stephie, I can’t get the boots off,” he says, sounding like a kicked dog, and the next thing she knows, Steph is kneeling on the floor in front of Jason and helping a fully grown man take off his shoes. The pants are the next to go. Jason even folds them clumsily while Steph digs through her closet to try and find some item of clothing with enough stretch to contain Jason.
When she turns around, he’s leaning against the wall to try and stop from swaying. His pupils are dilated so large they take up most of his iris. Steph walks over with a heinous triple XL student GSA shirt and a pair of sweatpants she stole from Tim who stole them from Connor. Instead of taking the clothes, holds his arms outstretched like he expects her to put the shirt on for him. Stephanie grumbles and obliges.
The shirt goes on fine, giving her a closeup of Jason’s truly glorious pecs in the process. The pants are another story. Jason is pliable, smiling at her dopily and letting himself be manhandled into them. The problem is that the fabric doesn’t seem to want to go past mid-thigh. Jason’s thunder thighs are stretching the fabric to the limit, causing Steph to struggle with them and end up with her face close enough to Jason’s briefs to see that they have little Shakespeare faces on them. God he’s such a dork.
Once fully dressed, he flops down face first onto the bed. Steph makes a personal note to revisit her purely academic interest in Jason’s ass at a later date, when he’s actually in possession of enough mental faculties to do something fun. There’s a certain appeal to the thought of getting Jason this out of his mind without any drugs. Maybe she’ll talk to Tim about that. Maybe Cass. For now she just leaves a voice mail for Tim.
“Hey Tim, I picked Jay up like you asked. Apparently a full dose of that sedative turns him into a total himbo. He’s kinda sweet like this though. Kept telling me my hair was pretty while I snuck him up the fire escape.”
Jason yawns behind her, still on the bed and wraps one heavy arm around her waist before burying his face in the small of her back.
“Read to me? Please?”
“Gotta go Timmy, apparently Jay likes being read to. We’ll talk later.”
Fanart for hella amazing ‘I got you babe’ by @fatcatsarecats
Here’s! -> http://fatcatsarecats.tumblr.com/post/182843031940/i-got-you-babe-nanimok-batman-all-media
I got you babe - Nanimok - Batman - All Media Types [Archive of Our Own] https://archiveofourown.org/works/17799218 fatcatsarecats: “Chapt
Tim - “you’ll get diabetes before 40 I swear”
Dick - “Jason bet on 30 you know?”
Tim - “It’s fine to take a nice nap kiddo”
Jason - *OH MY GOD JASON DON’T MAKE AN ASS OUT OF YOURSELF*
Timothy & Tim : “Fack Batman!!” *Gulp*
Tim - *Oh thank lord Damian didn’t like to show off his asset like Dick*
Damian - “.....what”
Ps1. This story is fucking amazing. Everything is beautiful and the scene are just perfect. I can’t stop reading it over and over.
Ps2. The drinking scene is THE BEST. LMFAO. Ra’s fricking Al Ghul, oh my pretty little boy Timothy. I NEED TO DIG IN MORE ABOUT THAT—-
Jason: i have a secret. Dick: you're a woman trapped in a man's body? Jason: no Damian: you're a man trapped in a woman's body? Jason: I am a man in a man's body. Damian: ugh, we're not talking about your night life.