In a modern AU, how would the Uchihas react to "no lube, no protection, all night all day" text message from their s/o??
I love such unhinged requests for these men🌸😭 Cutie Anon keep them coming. I had too much fun writing this!
Indra Ōtsutsuki
At first, he stares at the screen with that slow, dangerous smirk the one that promises trouble. He calls you immediately, voice low and commanding:
“Repeat that to me. I want to hear you say it.”
He clears his evening schedule within minutes. Expect him at your door, suit still on, but the tie already loosened. He doesn’t just show up he prepares.
Madara Uchiha
He raises a brow, scoffs once, then rereads it three times because surely his partner didn’t just challenge him of all people.
“All night and all day? You’re confident. Don’t beg for a break later.”
He shows up with the most annoyingly smug attitude, only fueled by the fact that you initiated it. He treats it like a competition he refuses to lose.
Shisui Uchiha
Shisui chokes on his water, stares at the text with wide eyes, blush creeping up his neck.
“I– wow, okay, so we’re doing that today?”
He sends five flirty voice notes in a row, all playful threats, then teleports (Shunshin) to your place faster than GPS could load. He’ll joke, tease, and flirt the entire way but do not underestimate him.
Izuna Uchiha
He freezes. Completely. You’ve just short–circuited his brain.
He types:
“…Right now??”
Deletes it.
Types:
“Are you sure?”
Deletes it again.
Finally sends:
“On my way.”
He arrives nervous but determined to prove himself. And once the switch flips? Good luck walking the next day.
Obito Uchiha
Obito drops his phone on his face. He wasn’t emotionally prepared.
He sends three emojis before finding words: 😳🔥🏃♂️
Then:
“Don’t play with me like that, I’m clocking out early.”
He literally makes up an excuse at work and leaves. He’s flustered, but the moment he arrives, the softness is gone, he shows he’s been waiting for you to ask.
Sasuke Uchiha
He acts unfazed… on the outside.
Inside? System malfunction.
He responds with a single dry text:
“Hn. Be ready.”
Then throws his phone onto the bed, runs a hand through his hair, and actually starts mentally preparing like he’s going into battle. He doesn’t brag, he lets actions speak.
Itachi Uchiha
He sets his phone down slowly, exhales, and smiles in that calm, devastating way.
He calls you, voice soft but with a sinful edge:
“You must really want me tonight.”
He doesn’t rush. He makes you wait in anticipation because he wants the moment to be unforgettable. When he arrives, everything is intentional, slow at first, then absolutely overwhelming when he decides you’re ready.
