#intergenerationalhealing

[arjunasearth]

It is healing when you begin to talk about it , because it becomes real, and you put it out in front of you and you can look at it, […] you begin to separate yourself from it. You are not your pain. You are a beautiful, wonderful, spirit […], a human being, that has had a really bad experience, perhaps a really painful experience.

But it is not what you are all about.

– Cree Darlene Auger

[janellejohnson]

I don’t get parents that see their kids clearly struggling and let them continue that way. I’ve told my dad numerous times but he lets it slide. Apparently he takes it as me just being emotional while my mom thinks it leads me to sin.

I wish people took mental health seriously. Even if I did have suicidal thoughts my parents think that it’s me just doing it for attention. I feel like I will never forgive them for that even if they tried hard without any emotional support. I just have a therapist and a dog.

As much as I should thank my parents for helping me by giving restrictive schedules in order to follow they keep on taking anything that make me an individual. I feel nothing now. I want to get away because I need to escape…. But I can’t.

[fandomregina]

Hey!! I read your analysis posts and they're SO GOOD, can't wait for more. I'm confused about the "generational curse" thing, I'm not sure what it is but something isn't clicking for me lol. Could you please explain what the curse is and how it started with Abuela and repeated in the Madrigal trio + the grandkids? Thanks!!! :)

Hi!! I love getting questions so thank you so much for asking one!!! And thank you so much! Hopefully I can get the rest of the scene out sooner or later, but the GIFs take a while to make so we'll see :)

It's actually generational trauma (or inter generational trauma) I was talking about. The definition from online is

"the concept developed to help explain years of generational challenges within families. It is the transmission (or sending down to younger generations) of the oppressive or traumatic effects of a historical event".

So for Encanto, the trauma is Alma and Pedro loosing their home to the soldiers and Alma loosing Pedro. Not only is Alma uprooted from her home, it's destroyed. Her husband is also taken from her, being murdered right in front of her. Although she gains shelter from the mountains and a magical house because of his sacrifice, that doesn't erase the trauma she has gone through. She also now has to raise a family and lead a village. This is a very large responsibility for someone who has lost their home, husband, has been removed forcibly from their homeland, has to raise 3 children, has to pretty much lead a village, and is having to do it all alone.

Because of this, Alma strives for perfection, has high expectations for her children and for using the magic gifted to them ("[We'll] earn the miracle that somehow found us"..."But work and dedication will keep the miracle burning. And each new generation must keep the miracle burning").

We see this trauma transmissioned onto her children, Julieta, Pepa, and Bruno. And then onto her grandchildren. Here is just a rundown of how the intergenerational trauma effects each Madrigal.

Julieta: She is the healer. I kind of see her having to play the mother role at a very young age because maybe Alma wasn't able to some days or weeks due to depression. She might also be the sibling the other two would come to after a fight with Alma or if they were upset and didn't feel like they could go to Alma (or being the therapist daughter/sister)

Pepa: Her emotions. She feels everything very strongly all the time. She most likely isn't emotionally stable. Alma usually yelled about her clouds or the certain weather above her head.

Bruno: "My gift wasn't helping the family". He couldn't really help the townspeople and his gift was seen as a bad omen of sorts. He was really the blacksheep.

Luisa: Being an eldest daughter and having a lot of responsibility placed on her head (yes I know Isabela is the oldest, but Luisa is also considered an eldest (to Mirabel anyway)). Worthless if not of service and honestly her entire song shows how the generational trauma affects her and honestly I might go into an analysis post on that song alone because it is a lot.

Isabela: The 'golden child'. Always always always having to be perfect. She can't step out of line or have any imperfections. She also seems to be a people pleaser. Going through the arranged proposal with Mariano to please Alma.

Camilo: He can't be himself or being himself isn't always what someone needs him to be. He has to always be changing himself to be what is needed of him to be.

Dolores: The middle/invisible child. She hears everything and everyone. Definitely a people pleaser. I mean, she lets Isabela have Mariano because Alma want him to marry Isabela, not Dolores, so she allows it to happen for the good of the family and doesn't complain.

Antonio: My baby is so young it hurts. But he goes to show you that no matter the age you are, you're still affected by intergenerational trauma. Pepa is a emotional wreck and so her kids cannot express their emotions well because she can't or gets yelled at for it by Alma. So, Antonio, instead of having a connection with his mother, he has it with Mirabel (for example, the walking to the door scene). Antonio is also very anxious about not getting a door because he knows first hand how it might affect him, seeing how it affects Mirabel after she doesn't get one since he lived with her for 5 years. He, along with the other kids, start helping the townspeople at about 5 years old. The pressure on these kids start young, if not from birth.

Mirabel: she sees how the trauma is affecting the family and wants to start the change to help them heal from it (end of the movie)

And as for all of them, they're really only seen throughout the movie as to be used by the townspeople for their gifts (if not by the townspeople themselves, then by Alma). They would do what they're asked no matter the cost really. And the Madrigals didn't get the help they needed until the end of the movie after Casita collapses because the townspeople finally see that they aren't perfect and kinda goes to show it's ok to ask for help. Nobody truly expresses what they feel either until things just collapse.

I think this movie does an amazing job at showing just how intergenerational trauma can affect families and how it's expressed in each generation/child. Also, the short shown before the movie (at least in theaters - called "Far From the Tree") is also an example of intergenerational trauma and how the cycle can be continued or stopped.

If anyone sees anything that may not be right or wants me to add something, let me know!!

[unofficialchronicle]

“Monarchs that survived the migration passed this message down to their children. The memory of family members lost from the initial winter was woven into their genes. When does a war end? When can I say your name and have it mean only your name and not what you left behind?” — On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous (p. 12) by Ocean Vuong

[workingchemistry]

I’m gonna preface this with I’m white Appalachian and not Hispanic, but I did grow up in inter generational trauma and have cptsd from it.

But I think the debate on whether or not Mirabel should have forgiven Abuela misses the whole point of the movie. I’m not going to tell anyone else how their family ought to heal but I know for me that there’s a difference in intentional abuse and a parent/guardian trying too hard to prevent further trauma that they end up hurting their dependent. Ime it’s really hard to hold the second against them.

Especially when, like Mirabel, you really genuinely truly do love your family with all that you have. Maybe forgiving whoever hurt you isn’t the right choice to heal but that doesn’t mean it’s always the wrong choice.

[mrsblackruby]

Highly Suggest This Vid

In my 8teen years I must recon with how much of my childhood I’ve blocked out because of the incarceration system, parental abuse, religious trauma, and racism.

There are so many systems of oppression that harm all of us no matter what are age is and people pretend the status quo wants to protect children and The Youth. When that’s a complete fabrication. I feel burdened when I think about my future but I think humans are worth saving. We need to heal because the systems have brutalized us all. We have to be able to confront the mask we created for ourselves. We need to believe we can guide ourselves without the shadow of authority. Pretty deep stuff…

[hear-what-she-said]

I heard Allison Russell for the first time during Farm Aid on Saturday. I’m also seeing others in my community with a similar message, speaking up and protecting future generations.

One of my favorite parts of the article is when she tells her 8-year-old daughter "the buck stopped with me. The intergenerational abuse stopped with me. It's never going to touch you."

Speaking about her album, Outside Child, she said, "There's a story of intergenerational trauma. But there's also a story of intergenerational resilience and strength and ability to survive. I wanted to amplify and uplift that."

https://www.tennessean.com/in-depth/entertainment/2021/09/23/allison-russell-outside-child-folk-music-nashville/5539898001/

Allison Russell: ‘The record isn’t about abuse, it’s about the journey out of it’

Allison Russell is using her album "Outside Child" to show that survivor's joy exists, and she's proof of it.

[kinginmyownmind]

"Healing From This Trauma, So My Kids Don't Have To"... Really a statement to sit in for a while...What does this truly mean if put in practice?

Having a sharp tongue, aggressive demeanor and all the violent impulses that come with that includes the abilty to close things off...people off...opportunities off...

Also can't forget the weapon of humor and laughing off! (Watching Dave Chappelle's The Closer just now and truly enjoying it, while also reading The Guardian article to try to understand the critique)

But are you healing? What does healing look like and how do you convey or "pass it down"? Whatever you are dealing with or are made to deal with because of other people's hate/actions...

I'm more and more trying to identify the root issues internally as these kids are getting bigger, smarter and more practiced at the social/intellectual/emotional judo of the parent/child sparring we do. In an effort to teach, it is a balance of wanting them to learn to protect themselves. Wanting them to carry themselves with a sense of strength, but also doing so in a way to not hurt them while doing it...

One wrong flip of a phrase...Pressure applied at the wrong time...holding too tight to something a second too long...boom!

Constant adjustment and self check and relying on your co-parent to inform your approach. But Healing...from trauma not a broken bone, cut, virus or even a transition in relationships...trauma (acute, chronic, and complex...buried and unrealized).

#Onward