They might be rookies in Ninja ways but they are masters in tomfoolery
Just look at these idiots
What the heck Choji
Someone had to say it
Like mom scolding her brats

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They might be rookies in Ninja ways but they are masters in tomfoolery
Just look at these idiots
What the heck Choji
Someone had to say it
Like mom scolding her brats
If Someone Had Stopped Obito On October 10th
Kushina is still the Jinjuriki
The Uchiha Massacre never happens
Itachi gets out of ANBU and becomes a Jounin teacher.
Shisui stays in ANBU but mostly causes general chaos
Neji’s father is still alive because Kumogakure violated the treaty between themselves and Konoha and Minato, unlike Sarutobi Hiruzen, has a backbone and does not give in when the Raikage yells at him.
This means that the changes to the Hyuga clan happen sooner.
In addition to this, Neji is less angry when talking with Hinata and is actually decently polite.
Sasuke becomes a Medical Ninja.
Naruto is decently smart (he has ADHD)
Naruto and Kiba are best friends.
Sasuke and Naruto get along decently but Sasuke doesn’t talk nearly enough to keep Naruto occupied.
Hinata is still fairly soft spoken but she and Naruto have some weird rivalry going on.
Sakura and Ino aren’t friends. They worked on a project together but Ino is a Clan Heiress and she has to work with Shikamaru and Choji.
That being said, Sakura is great friends with Naruto because she helps tutor him.
Ino is actually tamer than in canon. She quieter but still bossy to makes sure Shikamaru and Choji actually help her. Her mother, as previously mentioned in other posts, is an ANBU Black Ops and so Ino is decently trained in weaponry and combat as well. She automatically defaults to Shikamaru’s lead though.
Shikamaru is still lazy.
Choji is motivated and actively spars with Naruto and Hinata. Shikamaru and Shino usually watch them and keep score. Sometimes Sasuke joins to watch.
Because Naruto, Kiba, Choji, and Hinata have an after school sparring ring, Sasuke started his learned medical ninjutsu, which he learned from his aunt, to keep them from having to miss class the next day.
While doing that, Ino is actually working at the flower shop, training, reading up on clan jutsus, and generally having no free time.
Team 7 is still Naruto, Sakura, Sasuke under Kakashi, who is usually on time but is still super laid back like his canon self.
Team 8 is still Hinata, Shino and Kiba under Kurenai.
Team 10 is still Shikamaru, Choji, and Ino under Asuma.
Jiraiya is still a fucking creep. (I don’t like him btw, even if it’s a coping mechanism/mask). He does train Naruto as Minato can’t.
Also, Naruto resents Minato because he’s rarely home and Kushina is pushy to get him to learn Uzumaki clan techniques, which he doesn’t want to.
Ironically, Naruto hates ramen because he’s named after a common ingredient. It’s Kushina’s favourite dish though, so he’ll eat it, just not the narutomaki.
Also, Danzo’s on the run because Minato ordered him to end ROOT and when he didn’t, Minato tried to kill him but he just ran instead.
Itachi would probably become Hokage once MInato retires at like 40 to go back to training child soldiers.
Naruto Modern AU where Sasuke is this tired and stressed straight laced guy in law school just trying to live up to his parents over blown expectation because of his “perfect” older brother but he’s also hot or something so while he’s freaking out about law school people think he’s so cool and popular but in reality he has literally no idea what he’s doing. and Naruto is that one guy that skateboards and wears beanies all the time and snorts pixie sticks in his free time and is all “living to live, man” but at the same time would totally throw down in a Wendy’s parking lot and then like pat you on the back afterwards, he takes nothing seriously and is besties with his therapist
And the others? Oh boy. Kiba Inazuka is totally a dude bro but a dude bro who was raised by lesbians so he’s got that respect women juice down to a tee and he has girl friends and guy friends and like he’ll play football with the boys and be like “yeah Trisha painted my nails the other day <3 I love this shade” and they’re just like ?????. Shino is the weird wicked smart bug kid that names all of his beetles and will enthusiastically show them to you and he seems cold and emotionless most of the time but he hears everything and will show up at your house at 4 in the morning like “I heard you were talking shit about me, bitch.” Hinata is the sweetest ray of sunshine that cares about her friends more then literally anything else and because she’s a rich girl she’s friends with Sasuke but on the down low she’s so kind and she hardly ever talks about her personal issues but like every single one of the 9 would suplex her dad if they ever got the chance no questions asked.
Lee is weird and straight laced but also really loud and annoying, like a teachers pet that even the teacher doesn’t know what the fuck is going on with. Neji hates the fucking world and wants you to know it (and like fair king tbh fuck it up) but he also gets the best grades ever and is super loved by all his teachers even though he could out curse any sailor at any time regardless of circumstance. Tenten is weird she acts normal and is absolutely ordinary but everybody gets the feeling that one day she’ll snap and murder everybody in the room and like they love her but they keep their fucking distance if they value their heads.
Inoshikacho is like that one groups of friends who have nothing to do with eachother if their parents weren’t friends but they’ve been stuck to eachother like super glue ever since elementary school and there’s no going back now bitch. Ino is kind of a bitch and she talks shit but she has a moral compass for the most part and is genuinely a good person overall but spite her and she will fuck you up and ruin your life just because. Choji is laid back and chill and really really well adjusted and commonly gives sage advice out of nowhere because he’s probably the most mentally stable out of all of them tbh he just eats chips and tells jokes. Shikamaru is that kid who could probably outsmart Albert Einstein but he won’t ever turn in his fucking homework because of executive dysfunction so he just. He just sit there. People tends to think of him as a stupid stoner but he secretly knows everybodies secrets and darkest insecurities by heart.
And don’t even get me fucking started on Team Taka. Suigetsu is incredibly slutty but will also fight you for funsies and he looks harmless but he can fuck shit up if he feels like it aswell as get himself into the weirdest most convoluted situations you’ve ever seen. Karin is smart and tells it like it is always, everybody values her honesty and wit. She holds the brain cells, and only her. Juugo is a big scary looking tough guy that also owns a hundred different animals and feeds the squirrels and birds and meditates all the time even though he looks like a truck. He’s mostly a pacifist, surprisingly.
Okay, so I’ve been trying to make up a bit of a timeline for Team Minato’s ages (+ a little bit of Konoha 12 ages) bc the fan made one on narutopedia sucks, in my opinion.
So, the Academy’s school year is similar to Japan’s and that means the kid needs to have their birthday before April 1 to enter the upcoming school year.
We know that Rin’s birthday is November 15 and Obito’s is February 10; that means that Rin was born the previous year. She is about 3 months older than Obito. Kakashi, on the other hand, was born on September 15, well after April. He and Obito were born the same year (with Obito being 7 months older than him) but had Kakashi entered the academy when he was supposed to, he would have entered a year later. Instead, he entered when he was 4.
So, if this holds true, then that means that Sakura is actually the youngest member of Team 7, not the oldest. Her birthday is March 28, she’d enter a few days after her 6th birthday. Sasuke’s birthday is July 23 and Naruto’s is October 10 and, as far as I know, neither of them entered the academy early, so they’re in the right year.
All the other members of the Konoha 9 were born after April, except for Shino who was born on January 23, so he and Sakura are the youngest of the group (with Sakura being the baby).
For Team Gai, Tenten was born on March 9 while the boys were born on dates after April. This must mean that Tenten was born the same year as the majority of the Konoha 9.
Anyway, I don’t know if this is already well known in Naruto fandom and I’m just late to the party, but the timeline I previously mentioned had Rin entering the academy at 3 years old and that’s just foolishness.
Just trying out my new markers on the rookie nine. This got pretty popular on reddit. 😰
The cute kids in markers
sasuke is a bitch but we still love him (kinda) right?
Naruto Sexuality Headcanons
This is pre-boruto because I don’t know anything about Boruto.
Naruto is bi.
Sasuke is demi-sexual. It’s the only way I can explain the weirdness between him and Naruto, and him ending up with Sakura.
Sakura is straight.
Sai is ace. He likes paint.
Kakashi is ace.
Kiba is bi but to an almost pansexual degree? If someone’s down, he’s down.
Shino is aromantic but not asexual. He wants kids (he teaches at the Academy for christ sake! Though that doesn’t actually make a lot of sense as the clan heir... I’ll need to deal with that later)
Hinata is bi but prefers men. She’s experimented, specifically with a lot of blonds (she has a type, good for her) but really admires and respects Naruto.
Kurenai is pan.
Shikamaru is bi but prefers women. Specifically strong, domme like women (just look at Temari. Do not tell me that she would not top him.)
Choji is bi but Does Not Care for appearance. He cares more about how they treat his teammates.
Ino is pan. She does not care about age but will draw the line at children who are under 16 (my headcanoned adult age for civilian children and when Kage are legally allowed to start the spying via sleeping with a target) but she has no problem with older men, women, or unspecified gender.
Asuma is but did experiment when he was up with the Monks of the Fire Temples. It didn’t work out but hey, it’s not like he has a long lost kid somewhere being raised by a fire priest.
Neji... I can’t really figure him out. Too serious. Probably somewhere on the ace spectrum but doesn’t really care. Probably just interested in getting through life with Rock Lee as a teammate.
Tenten is BI AS FUCK
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO FIGURE OUT WHAT ROCK LEE’S SEXUALITY IS????? I JUST REREAD THE ENTIRE SERIES AND I DON’T GET GAY, ACE, BI, STRAIGHT OR TRANS VIBES FROM HIM!
My friend (who has never watched or read Naruto), that from a single picture, that he is somewhere on the pan/ace spectrum. I am deferring to their judgment because they are non-binary, openly bi and don’t know anything about him.
Might Guy is the same as Rock Lee. Maybe straight.
Temari is bi.
Kankuro is asexual. He likes being the fun uncle.
Gaara is very much ace but loves children. So he adopts way too many children. (He’s like Batman, with 10+ children running around that he’s not entirely sure are his but eh, doesn’t really matter at this point)
Karui is straight but was bi-curious in her youth.
Omoi is a baby. Probably bi or pan, but is full of anxiety and is not allowed anywhere near romance until he can get some anti-anxiety medication.
Not to say he can be in a relationship, but he’ll probably go nuts overanalyzing and then break up with the person in like, a month tops. Unless the person is really good, then I root for them both.
Mitarashi doesn’t care about sex or romance. She likes fire and explosions.
Ibiki is Tired. (I know it’s not a sexuality, but honestly, for this man, it should be an exception. He has to deal with the bullshit people of the T&I unit. Which is an entirely other post).
Zabuza and Haku are in a father/mentor-son/mentee relationship.
Haku was genderfluid.
Killer B doesn’t really want a family. He wants to rap.
A is bi. He has a son.
Terumi Mei is a lesbian goddess. She managed to seduce Zabuza once before he tried to kill her because they were in ANBU together. And he knew her girlfriend.
Itachi was pan.
Kisame was ace (he has a KID in Boruto????) and really likes sharks. Itachi tried to avoid all conversations like that after he first told the Akatsuki and Pein banned that kind of talk from then on.
Hidan is attracted to witchcraft.
Hashirama is straight but his wife was bi.
Madara was gay.
Obito was... yeah, no clue.
Rin was straight but tried a girl. Wasn’t her cup of tea but she doesn’t care about anyone’s sexuality.
Please, for the love of god, add more characters. I have no idea how many are on this list, but there are so many more. Feel free to add your own on.