Hold On: You're Into Closure
CW: Unhealthy relationship dynamics, angst, jealousy, past conditioning, BBU universe, discrimination against other WRU designations
Sunlight streams in through the library window, highlighting the last of his hastily written notes. Blue ink bright against white paper. The colors don’t bother him anymore. Around him is silence, not oppressive, but comforting, heavy, the knowledge in the books filtering into the air. A few muffled conversations echo through the stacks.
Ezra slips his textbooks and notes into his backpack. Checks his watch. Twenty minutes till he’s supposed to pick up Star. That’s plenty of time to get his final grade.
Ten minutes later and he’s sliding into the front seat of his Civic, ignoring the check engine light that pops on. Mr. Castillo has checked the car twice—even taking it to his brother—and there’s nothing wrong besides a faulty sensor. It’s cute when Star teases him about it, so there’s no rush to fix it.
He hums along to the radio, smiling at the trees lining the street. Green buds dot the dark branches, silhouetted perfectly against the blue sky. Finally. People fill the outdoor seating at the coffeeshop. Ezra recognizes a few of his classmates and waves as he walks in. Cindy and Star are bent over her phone, Cindy explaining something with exaggerated gestures.
“Hey, what are you two plotting?”
“Ezra! Seriously, come here, I can’t decide if gold or navy would be the best with Star’s complexion.”
Star awkwardly smiles. “We’re looking at, at, at, um . . . Cindy’s showing me makeup.”
“That’s cool. Eyeshadow, I’m assuming?”
“Yeah, how, how did you guess?”
“I’m boring, but I’m not stupid.” Ezra kisses Star. “Whatever you chose will be perfect.”
Star blushes. Cindy rambles on about undertones and shades, but Ezra tunes it out in favor of taking some deep breaths. He’s staying for dinner. Dinner. With the Castillos, and Star, and . . . Daniel.
Daniel. Star’s bonded. The guy who punched him.
The guy who’s ass I fully kicked.
There’s some small satisfaction there. He’s still able to fight, even after everything. But he’s promised Star that tonight he will be on his best behavior, so no fighting, no saying stupid things, being nice and polite and thanking whomever cooked because he was raised to have manners.
Unlike the oh-so-perfect Romantic that Daniel is supposed to be.
The conversation wraps up and Star hangs up his apron. Ezra waves to Cindy, taking Star’s hand, and heads out. The drive to the Castillos’ isn’t long enough. Ezra stares at the road, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel, not looking at Star. He can’t. He won’t. The moment he does, he’s going to say something he regrets. Swallowing back every snarky thought about the man he’s about to eat dinner with.
They pull into the driveway. Silence.
“Um, you, you, you . . . this is still fine?”
Ezra smiles and takes Star’s hand. “Of course, stjerne. I’ve been looking forward to Robin’s cooking all week.”
“No, I-I mean with Danny. He’s here. Is that okay?”
No. “Yes, it is. I promise I’ll be on my best behavior.”
Star doesn’t let go of his hand. Ezra kisses the back of it and puts on his most charming smile. Tension drains from his shoulders when Star smiles back. The rich smell of cooking meat filters into the night as they walk up to the front door. Ezra holds it for Star and then steps inside.
Thad waves from the kitchen. “Hey! Glad you could make it! The ribs are almost done cooking and I have an ice cream cake in the freezer. Do you want anything to drink? We have water, lemonade, wine—but Robin said I’m not supposed to offer that—and pop. I can also make coffee.”
“I’m good with just water.” Ezra waves a hand. “You don’t have to get it, I know where the cups are.”
He walks into the kitchen, acutely aware of the man sitting at the counter. Daniel’s gaze bores into the side of his skull, but when he glances over, Daniel quickly looks away. Ezra ignores him, grabbing a cup and filling it with water.
“Star?”
“I, I, I’m fine, thank you.”
Ezra ducks his head to hide his smile as Daniel’s shoulders tense. Every alarm in his mind goes off, warning him of the danger of an angry man, but he takes several deep breaths. I’m safe, I’m safe, I’m safe. He isn’t going to hurt me.
And if he does, I’ll kick his ass again.
Thad turns down the music. “How were classes? Work?”
“Class was good. Finished up my last paper of the semester. Um, is it alright if I use the garage this weekend? My project isn’t fitting in my apartment any longer.”
“Of course. We need to wash the car anyway and this will be a good excuse. Star, how was work?”
“Slow. Cindy and I talked about makeup, um, about makeup for a while. She wanted tips so, so, so I gave her some.”
“She’s your coworker, right?” Daniel asks. He stares at Star, angling his body away from Ezra. “The one who makes the fancy drinks?”
“Yes, she, she, she is. I can make those kinds in a, a few months. I’m still working on the, the, the basics right, um, right now.”
“You’ll do great,” Ezra quickly says. “You’re picking it up faster than anyone else I’ve seen. I’m not worried at all.”
“I’m not either.” Daniel finally turns and glares at him. “Star’s more than competent.”
“I never said he wasn’t.”
“Made it sound like you were worried.”
“In what world did my compliment sound like I was worried? Maybe you should get your hearing checked.”
“I am in perfect health, thank you. WRU signed and certified.”
Ezra forces his fingers to remain relaxed. One deep breath, then another. Shoving away the urge to slam Daniel’s head into the countertop. It would be nice. Shut him up and stop him from looking his way with those stupid brown eyes and scar that now twists his lips into a perpetual smirk.
“Kids, stop fighting,” Thad sighs. “Daniel, we’ve talked about saying that before.”
“Oh, so this is a reoccurring problem?” Any calm Ezra managed to pull together is instantly shattered. “Do you say that to Star too?”
“No, just assholes who deserve the reminder.”
“Assholes who kicked your ass into next week, if you don’t remember.”
“I remember just fine.”
“You sure? Because I’m more than happy to teach you that lesson again.”
Daniel huffs and turns himself fully away. Ezra rolls his eyes, ignoring Thad’s warning look as he gets himself more water. The kitchen falls silent, broken only by the hum of the oven.
“I’m home!” Robin steps in. Thad goes running to hug them, swinging them around. Ezra blushes and refuses to look at Star. “Hello, sunshine, Star, Ezra, Daniel. How is everyone?”
Thad laughs. “Don’t open that can of worms.”
Star frowns, mouth moving as he quietly repeats the phrase. Ezra smiles.
“It means there’s way too much to discuss right now.”
He ignores how Daniel leans close to hear the explanation. Star thanks him. As they move to set the table, he and Star talk about more phrases he has heard while working. Ezra is able to explain most of them and when he gets stuck, he turns to Robin for help. They answer smoothly, practiced, and Ezra is reminded yet again of their infinite patience.
Not him. Never him. Even back there, his patience was limited. Frustrated with himself, with the handlers, with the other Pets. His classmates. His coworkers. Himself.
They sit down and Ezra does not lash out like he wants to when Daniel’s shoulder knocks against his. He swallows back some retort about how Romantics aren’t violent and sits himself down next to Star, instantly taking his hand. The conversation ebbs and flows, led by the Castillos. Thad asks about his classes and Ezra responds about the test and the model he has to make and he isn’t failing any of his classes.
A gentle tug on his hand. “. . . What, what, what is college?”
Ezra hums. “Um, it’s upper education, after someone finishes high school. It’s a lot harder and lets people focus on what jobs they want to do.”
“Like WRU?”
“No, not like that, Daniel.” Fucking idiot. “It’s very different. Everyone there wants to be there and we’re learning about actual, real jobs that people have.”
“But aren’t we people too?”
“Yes, and that means you don’t do the jobs that WRU forced us to have.”
“So people doing those jobs aren’t real people. They’re just stupid and don’t deserve help.”
“Daniel, Ezra. This is not a productive conversation.” Robin doesn’t glare, but Daniel still flinches back. A warm glow of pride fills Ezra’s chest because he doesn’t flinch any more.
Daniel hunches his shoulders. “Fine.”
He’s just like you, remember? You know what’s under that anger.
Shut the fuck up.
Dinner finishes soon after. Ezra mumbles some excuse about homework that needs finishing. Star follows him to the front porch, slipping a hand around his waist. He leans into the touch.
“Thank you for, for, for being here.”
“Of course. It is an honor.”
Star blushes. It’s a perfect thing, his head angled slightly down, looking up through his lashes, cheeks tinged pink. A doll-like look. “You’re sweet.”
He chuckles and kisses his cheek. “I’ll see you tomorrow. We’re working the same shift.”
“I, I, I can’t wait.”
As Ezra drives away, he can’t help but glance back. Daniel has joined Star on the porch and even at this distance he can see the wild gestures of an argument. He grips the steering wheel and forces himself to keep driving.
It isn’t my fight. Star likes me. I know that.
Besides, he can do way better than Daniel. I’ll show him that.
Tagging: @blood-is-compulsory @darkthingshappen @whump-for-all-and-all-for-whump @whumpinggrounds @pigeonwhumps @cepheusgalaxy @hellodecisionparalysis (let me know if you want to be added/removed!)
