Are you serious, Dutch? Right in front of my salad?
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Are you serious, Dutch? Right in front of my salad?
Have a gifset of a cougar wreaking havoc on my housebuilding
(shameless plug in case anyone wants to see the full video)
🍎 van der linde gang as fruits
van der linde gang as consumables masterpost x
arthur morgan — apple. classic. dependable. bruises easier than it lets on.
dutch van der linde — pomegranate. dramatic. layered. stains everything it touches.
john marston — pear. solid. a little rough. softer inside than expected.
abigail roberts — blackberry. sharp. resilient. survives anywhere.
jack marston — strawberry.
small. sweet. needs protecting.
hosea matthews — fig. complex. thoughtful. better with time.
charles smith — blueberry. steady. grounding. quietly strong.
lenny summers — apricot. warm. bright. easy to like.
javier escuella — passionfruit. bold. expressive. not subtle about it.
micah bell — banana. loud. yellow. goes bad fast.
sadie adler — blood orange. striking. sharp. impossible to ignore.
bill williamson — grapefruit. blunt. bitter. hits harder than expected.
sean macguire — raspberry. sweet. chaotic. slightly messy.
kieran duffy — plum. soft. gentle. bruises too easily.
mary-beth gaskill — cherry. pretty. sweet. stronger than expected.
tilly jackson — green apple. crisp. observant. sharper than people realise.
karen jones — dragonfruit. bright. eye-catching. a little dangerous.
molly o’shea — lychee. delicate. elegant. out of place in the wrong climate.
pearson — coconut. tough exterior. surprisingly useful.
strauss — lemon. sharp. sour. lingers.
uncle - raisin. seen some things. still hanging on.
susan grimshaw — cranberry. tart. necessary. keeps everything balanced.
reverend swanson — fermented grapes. well. you know how that ends.
josiah trelawny — starfruit. ornate. theatrical. impossible to ignore.
jack marston (rdr1) — crabapple. harder. more bitter. same roots.
ps: i actually love all these fruits & characters 😭😂
hopw u enjoyyyy! lmk any other ideas!
I just really wanna see a documentary on the Van Der Linde as though they were real life people, and whose only documentation was through the pages of Arthur’s journal, some wanted posters, and the small side quests Arthur did being able to be traced back to him. Basically, thanks to Arthur’s drawings and entries, their legacies are able to live on.
People start doing DNA tests and jokingly recreating the Van Der Linde gang with mini reunions on the internet.
Man… this makes me wanna draw people who look vaguely like the gang recreating this image in modern times…
(Also because I love the idea of there being gay ass drawings of Charles in the book and historians being like: “they were great friends”)
How Tall I Think the VDLG Are Based on Facts and Knowledge
Arthur- 6'0" (183cm) my beautiful baseline king. Tbh this makes it easier to base everyone else's height offa Arthur since he's the main playable character n all.
John- 6'2" (188cm) to Arthur's despair and a point of pride for John. They both remember the growth spurt that did it.
Dutch- 5'11" (180cm) but if you ask him he says 6 foot. Wears lifts or tall boots to make himself taller >.>
Hosea- 5'9" (175cm) not too tall, not too short. A very unintimidating height. Makes it better (sexier) when he bosses folks around.
Grimshaw- 4'11" (150cm) big angy, tiny package
Tilly- 5'4" (162.5cm) average lady height idk
Uncle- 5'10" (178cm) if it weren't for his lumbago he'd be 6'3" and no thats not a lie at all
Abigail- 5'6" (167cm) she's gotta get on her tippy toes to hug/kiss John and John loves picking her up
Bill- 6'1" (185.5cm) something something I like tall husky men
Javier- 5'7" (170cm) short king represent! Also, the height difference with his ship pairings🤤
Sean- 5'9" (175cm) my baby just has the silliest height. And he swears its proportional👀
Lenny- 5'11" (180cm) he only found out while standing next to a barefoot Dutch at the percolator in the morning. Filed it away for a rainy day
Charles- 6'3" (190.5cm) the Lone Wolf. The American Bison. A big scary man with the softest heart😭💕
Karen- 5'10" (178cm) I love love love the idea of Karen being tall. Like, there's a reason she can handle the kickback on those rifles. Also...for my lesbian fantasies.
Mary-Beth- 5'5" (165cm) a perfectly dainty height. Uses that extra inch and her tip toes to give Tilly forehead kisses🥰
Molly- 5'3" (160cm) she loved literally getting swept off her feet by Dutch (past tense👀)
Pearson- 5'9" (175cm) idk man I literally dont think abt Pearson that much. He yells at me too much about the stringy meat I donate (  ̄- ̄)
Swanson- 6'0" (183cm) but you'd never know cuz man's is always on his ass
Kieran- 5'8" (173cm) he's a little shrimpy but also I think he'd be taller if he stood up straight
Sadie- 5'5" (165cm) she is tiny but mighty
Jack- uhhh how tall are children? 3 feet tall (100cm)
Trelawney- 6'1" (185.5cm) why is he so tall? Well, he's gotta put all that charisma somewhere (its the top hat really)
Micah- 1 in tall. Fuck you Micah. (My partner says Micah is 6'1" or 6'2" but just has terrible posture)
EVEN MORE rdr2 cats
Random headcanons for rdr2 characters, modern and 1899.
- John is the best/funniest person to ragebait.
- Sean, John, & Arthur ate dirt as kids.
- Charles would love a lazy river and would spend hours there. Though, he would actively avoid Uncle who is also enjoying the lazy river.
- I feel like Karen would have a few pet reptiles. Like a chameleon or a gecko.
- I just know Tilly and Abigail have chased John with frogs. He doesn't like them. They look at him weird.
- Javier has bitten someone in a fight and will do it again.
- Arthur once tripped and fell into a mud puddle and he was about to just let it take him until Charles showed up.
- Hosea will just hide shit, for no reason other than he was bored. The remote? Gone. Dutch's books? Never existed. Someone's cigarette box? In a trench at the bottom of the ocean.
- Jack is the only person who can counteract this. He finds everything. Arthur will be just standing around looking for a pen and suddenly Jack is handing it to him.
- John would be that kid in middle school who was forced into band and played the flute. (He was horrible) Only to be kicked out because the flute "mysteriously" broke.
- Arthur threw it at him after John tried stealing his journal.
- Sean is the kind of man who wants to kiss his homies goodnight, but none of his homies will allow it.
If you ever stumble across Uncle singing and think to yourself "hm he sounds a little different" then that is because you have caught yourself an easter egg, a sad one. James McBride who voices Uncle in the majority of rdr2 was not the original voice cast for Uncle, rather that was John O'Creagh whom O'Creagh Run was named after, however he died during the production of the game and thus had to be replaced, but a few of his singing portions remain.